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MedHelp Member's Question

Ecstacy

by Andrew, Sep 18, 2000 12:00AM
Ok, I've been doing Ecstacy since the new Millineum and I've been enjoying it so much.  I have a great groupe of friends with which I go to the rave club and we always have a great time.  I've always prided myself on being a hard worker but I've always played hard to.  Latey I've begun to worry about my mental state of minde as well as my phsysical.  I think this is causing me irreprable dmamage and it's disturbing, but at the same time, the escape and feeling of euphoria it offeres is far to tempting.

I've had my fair share of trauma to deal with in the past 3 years, the least of which is graduating University and being in the work world.  My life is nothing like it used to be, I'm only 25 and I feel like I'm getting so old already.  Ecstacy gives me that feeling of youth, it allows me to have the fun I couldn't have while in University..................I don't want to stop.  However, my mind is screeming for me to give it a rest.  I don't want to stop seeing or hanging out with my friends even if they still do it.  How do I deal with this, how do I control the urge to take the pill when my other friends decide to?  I just want to be able to have fun again without that ecsacy and I'm worried I've gone to far for that.  Is there help?
Member Comments (24)

by Brad, Sep 18, 2000 12:00AM
I was wondering, are there any doctors out there who know about "E" and might even take it on occasion?  Is once every 2 weeks to much and if so, what do you consider to be occasional use?  I guess, like Andrew I'm concerned about becoming depandent on it.  I've cut down to once every month, but is that concidered to be responsible use or not?  I'm not wanting to stop.....I'd still like to do it on occasion, I just want to be careful and use it in moderation.  Also, how do I get my friends who have been doing it as often as I....to hold back and think of it the same way I do now.  I just want to make sure that we don't kill a good thing and that everyone remains safe and well!

I think that's possible.  I think it's rediculous that Andrew should have to give his friends, if they are truly his friends, then they will respect and support his decisions.  You're on the right track Andrew just make sure you don't get cought up in the "Crowd"!  LATER!

by loanne, Sep 19, 2000 12:00AM
hi andrew.  i relly admire the fact that you're thinking about this rather than waiting for the inevitable consequences that arrive when we continually look outside of ourselves to be able to feel good. sometimes i think it doesn't matter which drug it is.  in aa, we call it changing seats on the titanic.  if you are unable to find what you need without altering yourself to do it, then you are at the beginning of a very long, lonely, miserable road.   keep posting.

by Andrew, Sep 19, 2000 12:00AM
I've recently gone to see my physician and she's placed me on an anti-depressant as well as give me a recommendation to a good psychologist.  I'm not wanting to take the pills, however I do want to see the psychologist, does anyone think this is wise?  I used to be a very happy person, I think I can be that again but I think it can happen without the medication.  I agree with you Joanne, as much as I'm not wanting to.........I'm going to have to make some changes if i want to get better.  I just don't want to loose any friends!

by CHAD FROM PHILLY!!!, Sep 19, 2000 12:00AM
Andrew, screw your friends. Trust me I know what I am talking about. I use to do X very often then switched to GHB. I had a harder time detoxing off of GHB than any other drug. I don't think you need the anti-deppressants. In my mind if you can't make yourself happy then your screwed. I think all you need is a change of life. Stop clubbin' and hanging out with those guys for a couple of weeks to see what I mean. Leave them behind!

by From Andrew to Chad, Sep 22, 2000 12:00AM
I completely disagree with you.  I don't think you should have to give up friendships because of a few bad habbits.  If what you have is true friendship then your friends will respect and support you regardless.  My biggest fear was that they woulden't, because I woulden't be going out with them as much.  WELL THAT'S NOT THE CASE!  I've had more support than I can tell you about, in fact we've even decided to start hanging out in pubs again, their suggestion....not mine.  I always knew I had great friends.......I'll never doubt itr again!  Sorry but you're wrong!

by tom to Andrew, Sep 22, 2000 12:00AM
I think Chad was referring to the very real "peer druggie" pressure that happens simply by being around people who are using. They might not be encouraging or actively pressuring you to use, but the situation itself generates incredible pressure to get high when all around you are lit. It's not that they stop being friends, they're all just using and you're ... not. If you've ever gotten truly clean and sober (not something I've experienced much), it really puts you in another dimension. You don't laugh at the same lines, boring things stay boring, and finally, they notice you're bored and say, "well, excuuuuse us." You suddenly feel like the vice principal taking everyone to detention. They're oil, you're water.

by Shiny, Sep 25, 2000 12:00AM
What is GHB?  You know everyone says drugs are so easy to get and bla-bla-bla, I know off no one who can get any speed, or anything else for that matter.  Guess it's a good thing too because I know I wouldn't have the will-power to say no.

by Andrew to Tom, Sep 27, 2000 12:00AM
Well maybe you don't have the will power......I don't know, but I went out to the clubs with my friends this weekend and the majority of us didn't flip/roll.  Sure there were some that did roll but there was no pressure......they understand why I chose to do this!  Anyway, that's beside the point, I had a great time anyway and all I did was was have some drinks and a few tokes here and there.....Nothing serious!  Who's says you can't have a good time and enjoy the music when you're not on Ecstacy.  My mind is so much clearer now that I havn't rolled for 2 weeks, I'll probably never roll again!  In fact, as I looked around the rave club that night I noticed just how ****** up everyone was and I knew then and there that I even though the ecstacy feel phenominal at the time......it screws your head up and I value my sanity far to much for that.  Peer pressure is only as strong as you let it be, once you've made up your mind, nothing should be able to change it!  This is one lesson I'e learned out of all of this!

by Andrew to Tom, Sep 27, 2000 12:00AM
Well maybe you don't have the will power......I don't know, but I went out to the clubs with my friends this weekend and the majority of us didn't flip/roll.  Sure there were some that did roll but there was no pressure......they understand why I chose to do this!  Anyway, that's beside the point, I had a great time anyway and all I did was was have some drinks and a few tokes here and there.....Nothing serious!  Who's says you can't have a good time and enjoy the music when you're not on Ecstacy.  My mind is so much clearer now that I havn't rolled for 2 weeks, I'll probably never roll again!  In fact, as I looked around the rave club that night I noticed just how ****** up everyone was and I knew then and there that I even though the ecstacy feel phenominal at the time......it screws your head up and I value my sanity far to much for that.  Peer pressure is only as strong as you let it be, once you've made up your mind, nothing should be able to change it!  This is one lesson I've learned out of all of this!

by tom to Andrew, Sep 28, 2000 12:00AM
a few tokes? Andrew, now you know that's cheating! I was referring to that ghastly, "I'm going to see my parole officer" sobriety, that, "I just walked in on my mother-in-law taking a dump" sobriety. That's very different than a few beers and a couple joints.

by Andrew to Ttom, Sep 28, 2000 12:00AM
It's not like I'm in Detox or anything!  Truth be known, I barely drink (my father was weekend binger, it turned me off) and as for smoking some joints here and there over the weekend, that's nothing compared to some collegues of mine at work.  So many people do and yet no one admits it.  My problem lies with ecstacy, I feel extremely confident in saying I've battled that demon and it wasn't nearly as hard as I thought it would be.  I think at the beginning I was scared that I was addicted to it, now with the help of 2 good doctors, I've just come to find out that like 2 of my siblings, I have an Anxiety disorder which was only later amplified by the ecstacy.  Now that I have everything straitened out, life is beautifu lagain and I'm functioning much like I was a year ago.  It's amazing!

by Nick, Oct 17, 2000 12:00AM
I never really did ecstacy that much.  I can even count the instances (4).  The last time i took one (yellow ck), which was a half a pill...i had the worst experience of my life.  After it started kicking in, the first 10-30minutes were fine and i had that great 'e' feeling.  Then i decided to drink literally 2 sips of MGD (because my friend exclaimed that it enhances the roll).  After drinking, it caused my stomach to hurt and i had that sick feeling.  I had that throw-up feeling, so i finally barfed out everything that was in my system (which wasn't much, considering i didn't eat for roughly 6 hours).  After throwing up, i went walking upstairs with 2 of my friends, when all of a sudden i sat down near the dining room table, they sat down also.  I started hearing things and being paranoid.  When they sat me near my bed and told me that it was better for me to lay down...as i began to lay down, i started to feel like i was going to literally die...i was teaching myself how to breath (because i couldn't breath naturally)...then when i looked all around my arms and hands, my veins seemed to dissappear and my whole body started tinggling.  After 10 minutes of this, my fingers started crutching (coming together) for roughly 30mns.  My friends massaged my arms and hands trying to get it back to its original state.  After it did, my body and head got tinggly again..and was like that for another hour.  Finally when i felt like i was at least a lil back to normal,,,i layed down and went to bed.  When i woke up, i woke up with the biggest headache,,,and i looked at my veins and it looked very small (around my arms and hands) compared to what it is normally.  The headache progressed throughout the week on and off...this headache was one i never experienced before.  I have to mention that i am about 5`8`` and 135lbs and i smoke about 5 cigarettes a day.  i didn't smoke until 5 days later, when i smoked a cigarette, i would get this headache to get dramatically worse and last to literally the next day.  Finally, its been roughly 3 weeks...and it feels like i still have this bad symptom...the main 2 symptoms include reduction in veins EVERYTIME i smoke (which from now on, no more smoking), and a [extreme] headache on occasion.  If anyone knows/experienced this...or has any comments/suggestions about this, please email me at:

***@****



I am hoping that time will prevail with this, my family has no idea that i did any drug, and i want to keep it that way.

by Luke, Oct 20, 2000 12:00AM
I have been taking pills for over a year now along with the majority of my friends at university.  I hate to **** on the government's parade but I'm pleased to say that we are all industrious students with no mental or physical disorders, and all together have happy-happy lives.  Dysfunctional?  Nope.  But I do recognise that as a student, my brain is my livelihood once I graduate.  To this end I have searched many archives to find out everything bad about pills.  There's a lot.  But it all seems to be avoidable/insignificant.  70-80 people have died from ecstacy.  That's it.  I worry about my kidneys a bit because we are still not sure what MDMA does to them.  Apart from that, it seems like quite a safe bet.  Until last night ... My french house-mate got a phone call from his mum (a nurse) about an article she read on ecstacy (that's right readers, we even tell our mums).  According to a french doctor, if you have ever taken more than two pills, you have a 75% chance of developing altzheimers (spelling?) or Parkinson's disease.  Now that IS worrying.  I don't know if you lot in the States have heard anything about this but I would be interested to hear any replies on the topic.

Cheers,

Luke

by earl, Nov 27, 2000 12:00AM
hello all i am thinkin about takin "X"i used to have sever anxiety and panic attack but they went away then i too LSD and had a severe anxiety attack and feel like im trippin all the time the way i see things,they look wierd like on acid ,im getting better and am thinkin of taken X and would like to know what is the most reliable brand and should i take half the first time or should i not take it at all i want to feel the euphoria + they say i can help you find yourself and fix whats wrong in your life,since the acid i kinda feel different like im distant ,dull inside!! (SOMEONE  PLEASE GIVE ADVICE!!!!THANKS FOR THE TIME

by to earl, Nov 29, 2000 12:00AM
it dosnt sound to me like you have much brain as it stands why would you want to loose more when you have so little.i hope your post was a joke. that **** kills  wise up dipshit

by J, Nov 30, 2000 12:00AM
Luke, I knew nothing about this link to Parkinsons/Altzeimers.

I too am a university student (final year) and regularly take pills with my friends. Likewise no dysfunctional/junkie element in this group of people, rather some close friends who prefer the dance scene to the "drink beer and get in a fight" mentality that people the world over condone as people "getting carried away" or "having one too many".

Alcohol/cigarettes/drink driving/bad diet/car crashes........... the list goes on. You are at more risk from doing any of these than ecstacy. And thats a fact.

by J, Nov 30, 2000 12:00AM
Luke, I knew nothing about this link to Parkinsons/Altzeimers.

I too am a university student (final year) and regularly take pills with my friends. Likewise no dysfunctional/junkie element in this group of people, rather some close friends who prefer the dance scene to the "drink beer and get in a fight" mentality that people the world over condone as people "getting carried away" or "having one too many".

Alcohol/cigarettes/drink driving/bad diet/car crashes........... the list goes on. You are at more risk from doing any of these than ecstacy. And thats a fact.