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Addiction: Substance Abuse Community
This community is a place to share information and support with others who are trying to stop using drugs, prescription drugs, alcohol, tobacco or other addictive substances. Discuss with others, the symptoms of addiction, addiction recovery, ways to quit like tapering and cold turkey, and withdrawal symptoms. If you are interested in general "chat", please visit our Addiction Social Community.
open fourm. what is our goal here.
by hippy, Nov 16, 2002 12:00AM
my own personal experence here at this fourm has been a great help to me ever since i stumbled acrossed it back in feb /02
whhile i have been here i learned how to deal with the probleem
of getting off a 10 to 20 a day vike habit.
the good folk's here welcomed me ,and pointed me in the direction of the vitamine receipe here at the fourm known
as thomas's receipe. i started taking it right away and it helped
greatly in the area s of depression during withdrawls and lack of energy due to withdrawls.
along with the supportof the people here at the fourm i was able
to kick cold turkey. i still read the post everyday , and i try to reach out and answer any questions that i can.
there are other people here who have to take meds for severe pain issues. the people here at the fourm in this situation
are a great help to anyone dealing with such issues.
i have been around addicts that are clean an some that use,
and they all do there best to get along, we are a sensitive
lot. one of the hardest things for us to do is to ask for help,
amit when we are wrong, ask for direction. and sy wer are sorry.
these are secondary issues, the primary issues are geting off the drugsand dealing with pain and taking meds responsably for
real pain issues.
peace!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
whhile i have been here i learned how to deal with the probleem
of getting off a 10 to 20 a day vike habit.
the good folk's here welcomed me ,and pointed me in the direction of the vitamine receipe here at the fourm known
as thomas's receipe. i started taking it right away and it helped
greatly in the area s of depression during withdrawls and lack of energy due to withdrawls.
along with the supportof the people here at the fourm i was able
to kick cold turkey. i still read the post everyday , and i try to reach out and answer any questions that i can.
there are other people here who have to take meds for severe pain issues. the people here at the fourm in this situation
are a great help to anyone dealing with such issues.
i have been around addicts that are clean an some that use,
and they all do there best to get along, we are a sensitive
lot. one of the hardest things for us to do is to ask for help,
amit when we are wrong, ask for direction. and sy wer are sorry.
these are secondary issues, the primary issues are geting off the drugsand dealing with pain and taking meds responsably for
real pain issues.
peace!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Mrs. Rat,
I don't like calling you that because it seems so negative and you are a good human and don't deserve that title.
No, I did not give my son for adoption. The drug addict father abducted him from the daycare after I left him after he told me he killed someone.
I told the police, how useless they were. Since he was the birth father and went out of state they refused to track him down. I never allowed drugs at that time. I was really sraight as an arrow. I did not even drink caffiene even though I loved iced tea. I was an athletic health nut so to speak.
The ex-boyfriend, was straight until one year after residing with me. He started on weed and went on from there but only at his buddies as I told him never to bring it to the house. He was in the LSD days and stayed away for three days after I had my son then not quite 1 and 1/2 years old. He came home in a panic and told me he thought he killed someone. I said ,you either did or did'nt. No details but I called crime stoppers. They even came out here over 10 years later to ask questions. I had left him shortly thereafter he told me that with my son. Two months later, boom, I went to pick him up after work from daycare and they said OH, your husband came by and picked him up.
I haven't seen him since. I told the police. What useless trash they were. I have spoken with him about eight months ago, he contacted me at 22 years of age. He said he would call back and give me his cell phone when he got it. Nothing. I offered him my land in Florida. I saved it for him, on a lake. I offered him to come here and have my lawn service and plant nursery half/half and share my house and offered to put him through college. He was too confused and overwhelmed. I don't want to write a book so it's not all in complete order, but no, it was a kidnapping.
Thank you for asking. If you have any suggestions I am open to your comments anytime. If not on the forum. I will get a HOTMAIL Address to discuss it considering the things here lately.
I would like to hear your story too, I am not clean now, so don't think I one of those holier than thous. Take care, you are not a rat, maybe a cat! I love cats they are so intelligent and love their babies. I have 10 cats, four kittens, 1 dog.
Take care and and God Bless you.
Chatahan.......wildcat
Hippee,
This the the most intelligent post I read today, thank you. You are so correct. We need to support each other in sobriety and not bicker especially these petty things. I admit my share yesterday. Remember once I said something to you, I cannot even remember now but I apolgized the next day and posted to you sensibly and you returned a pleasant post. We should try to get over these little glitches I call them and move forward.
Yes, I drank two days ago after having a seizure. My mistake. But yesterday I did not, but had w/d's of course. You know the viscious cycle, you've been there. I am so depressed today I don't even feel like going to church. I know that's the devil wispering with all this negativity here lately.
I am glad to hear of your soon to be adoption. You are so lucky to be sober and have a good wife to help you. I wish I could find my son. I looked his name up the other day on the net from where he last told me the last state he resided in. I wanted to call, but there were several listings as the father changed his last name to a really common one. His first name is not too common though. I may try calling,
Hippee,
Sorry but my cat jumped on the keyboard and blammo, a post.
I was almost finished anyhow. I was just saying I may try calling him. I pondered it all week. and that is probably one of my triggers. I have to get my butt to meetings. They helped in the past, so I should go with what worked before.
Thanks for your inspirational message on what we really should be discussing on this board.
I should go now and hopefully others will post positive and drop all that entire last thread, including the one a little ways down. Take care and God Bless.
Chatahan........wildcat
I'm on day 5 here today and hanging in there. I have times where my brain is clear and those are the times I will be using to talk with others.
MrsRat
said we were sory about it and moved on. i know we all
need ech other help. you never know when you will need that
person to talk with,.
one addict helping another is without paralel, sorry for the
mis spelling.
i hope everyone is doing and feeling well, pax and love.
hippy/ michael
My first thought after reading your post, even in this brain fog of day 5, tells me your ex sounds like a few of my ex's with the 'I killed someone' bull**** talk. They do that to scare you into staying with them. I, like you, didn't fall for it and left.
I also have an ex who has my youngest son. He will be 13 in a few months. Just got my daughter back after she raised enough hell her dad was tired of her and she had found me by going thru her grandma's addy book when she wasn't around. She just turned 16. I also had custody of both of them, but after a divorce had no choice but to let them go to their dads. I had no job to take care of them and no where to live. Was recovering from a head on car crash too.
Oh how I wish I could talk to your son. He's young yet, please give him more time to come to you dear lady. It sometimes takes till our kids have children of their own, before they see things as we, their parents, see them. Then they understand and do come back to us.
My birth mother when I found her and to this day, is an alcoholic. I never let that keep me from loving her. She gave me this beautiful life that I'm trying to get back. The Crohn's Disease comes from her bloodline, not my birthfather's. I still have to love her as she is. I can only pray that one day she will get to the point where she doesn't need to cover the pain of her lost kids any longer with the alcohol.
To find your son right now is up to you. Only you know for sure how he will react to you if you are not yet sober. You may or may not want to wait until you are sober before you try for contact again. We all are different in how we view others and what personal traits of theirs we may or may not agree with.
I will happily email you if you get a hotmail addy or any of the tons of free types of webmail there is available today. I do know that hotmail has not had the best of security in the past. You may wanna try another free service for email. I'd hate to see your email get read by an employee sitting in an office somewhere, just cause he's bored and he can.
MrsRat or BB, if you prefer to call me that :)
Lisabet,
You were not rambling at all. It must be tough to hold a secret. That has to be just as hard in my opinion. You are waiting for the axe to fall so to speak. I will be praying hard for you to able to find the right time in God's will to let your family know the truth. Then you will have full support.
That's my problem, lack of support. Always winging it on my own. With all the responsibilities of life we need support, I don't mean financial, but emotional. Financial doesn't hurt either!!!! LOL..... JUST KIDDING THERE. You know I am listening to the songs I referred to and came back and saw your response. I am one of those that always survived and believed in isolation. I am really isolated here on Guam, I'll tell you that. LOL. Maybe only the arctic would be more isolated, but I despise cold weather!!!!!
Right now I hear, I saw you on the radar scope, your eye was more than what I expected. We are in double jeapardy, double jeapardy.
I need to change the song some, because it was referring to Pakas double eyewall. I will rewrite it for Chatahan and Halong five days later.
Off the wall, sorry, first time I listened to music in a while due to depression.
OKAY, THIS IS FOR YOU, .....WE ARE BACK ON THE ROAD AGAIN , WITH OUR EYE TO THE SKY, THE DRYLINE IS FIRING HIGH, SHE IS ON THE GROUND...... AND SO ON............ Sorry trying to get myself in a better mood. The addiction songs and resulting consequences are a little more intense and serious.
You now I have two tornado songs that would have been better suited for Twister. But I never sent them. Talk about babbling, I really am showing my true love,,,,,the wind......
I need to email you, I saw it twice, can you post it again, I would like to share more. We have so much that can be done if we put more than one mind together. Talking here as you've seen lately is wierd at best.
Take care and God Bless.
Chatahan.........wildcat
My e-mail address is ***@****. I would be glad to hear from your anytime.
Love and good-nite, Lisabet
MrsRat,
Thank you for your comments and suggestions. It is very comlicated like I said and sobiety is not my real issue here as I've tossed a full unopened just obtained bottle more than once.
Right now I am in full confusion. It may be the low grade Klonopin for my seizures, or the fact I had a seizure a couple of days a go. Plus I stopped the Ultram and need to run if you know what I mean? I think I just want to rest. I skipped Church and need to do other things. I don't know why I am still on here. I don't feel good. I need to go. Sorry, but thank you for your concern. Take care and God Bless,
Chatahan.......wildcat
You did make me laugh, yes, a Crohnie knows what 'going' a lot means. LOL. I'm on a first name basis with my toilet, have been for most of my life.
Due to time zones I'm hours ahead of you, so I have hours yet before I will sleep I'm afraid, even with all the drugs I have to knock me out. They don't work real good during the withdrawal time I am finding out. Not being able to get warm isn't helping me any either. The cold makes me flare :(
I am unable to go to church for some time in the future. If you are like me, can you call your Pastor on the phone and talk with him ? That's what I have been doing with mine. We pray over the phone when I need it. I hope that's an option open to you.
Hope tomorrow when you are up and posting, it finds you feeling better than you did today. Heh, hope that for me too.
MrsRat
mrsrat,
It's only 6:40 pm here. You must go to sleep really early. I can go anytime. All I have to do is lay down and boom, asleep. That's except during withdrawal. I have to get up early tomorrow as I have two of my cats to be spayed. Or I will have fifteen soon.
I do not discus my really personal life with anyone, so don't bother asking please. The church thing. Gotta go, I don't feel well and the tape player is screwing up. TAKE CARE.
Chatahan........wildcat
We have 'Arizona' time here. We never change our clocks, so half the year we are Pacific time, the other half we are Mountain. Once I was here a couple of years I pretty much got the hang of it.
By your time that you said, it sounds like you aren't in the states, yet I thought you said you were in Florida (OHHHH, how I miss it).
Forget where you posted it at, but I also don't discuss religion on the net. That's something my hubby enjoys, but I don't. I am sad I am gonna miss communion tomorrow though. *sigh*
Gonna go now for awhile. My daughter brought me home a banana and I am gonna try to force myself to eat it. Read y'all in here say it's good for the leg shakes and I get them when I lay down. I haven't eaten since monday, yes, it's saturday, I've been staying on a liquid diet because of my Crohn's. Hopefully eating it won't cause me pain and it will help the legs.
MrsRat
Suzie
Suzie,
Yah, your as good as anyone to blow off some steam. I just went out for a peaceful dinner at Wendy's. As I was coming out, This girl said. "Hey, remember me from mental health?" She was all smiles and happy. The guy with her just sat and looked stunned.
I said yah, "aren't you the one that pushed me on the floor? She said yes. I said, "yeh, I have had a permanent lower back broblem ever since." She just giggled. I said, "You know, if I wasn't on 12 mg's of Klonopin at that time I would have thrown you through the wall." She giggled again. I said,"Really you are lucky, I was on 12 mg's of Klonopin. DO you know what that means?' She just looked starry eyed, I said, "I have had a f#$%d up lower back ever since. If I was not on 12 mg's, I would have probably killed you then."
She just giggled and didn't even seem to be coherent of the consequence of her action. I told her bluntly, "Don't ever introduce me to yourself again in the future or I may klll you and maybe anyone with you".
I know there I made a threat, but she broke confidentiality as well as I still could sue her for injuring me. I said,"If you don't believe me, I have a machete right here waiting for you." my dog was waiting too!!! Good Bart!!! She had nothing more to say and and I heard the boyfriend say let's go. Then we both drove away. Man, I still wish I had thrown her at the wall. I called the cops back then, but pffffffffff, useless ****. I was just another f#@kin psycho to them.
The theme here, maybe the ***** will think next time before getting violent. I was detoxing and could not do anything except call the police, a waste. But I warned her of next time, don't think you are a friend just because we shared an in-patient