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Any words of wisdom for trying to taper over the holidays?
by lisabet, Dec 01, 2002 12:00AM
Please help - I've relasped in a big way. The last few weeks I've tapered fairly successfully from 10-12 hydro habit a day down to 5 or 6 a day, plus cut way back on my Jack Daniel nighttime habit. Was actually starting to feel good about myself, then Thanksgiving rolled around, everyone piled in at my house for the holiday meal; a nice day, no bickering, yet I found myself in the bathroom time and time again swallowing pills; needless to say I'm back up to 10-12 again plus drinking again the last 3 nights. Seems like I just fall apart during the holidays when expectations are so high; spending time with family, trying to make the holidays special for my teenager. Does anyone have any suggestions how to make the holidays easier to get through? If this comes across as sounding self-pitying, I apoligize. I am just so disgusted and mad at myself. Thanks for listening to me vent. Love/Peace, Lisabet
I have given this a lot of thought and here, in my humble opinion, are the key points to keep in mind.
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2003 SOBRIETY CHALLENGE - HOLIDAY TAPER PLAN -
Dec 1st - Start
Jan 1st (or sooner) - End
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The idea is that everyone here, as a group, start our tapering plan today, and we support each other in our efforts such that, by Jan 1st, 2003, we are all at a ZERO dosage with our drug of choice.
There are several key points that I have gleaned from everyone here, plus other sources:
1) Accept the fact that you will be in some pain. Deal with it in any way you can without narcotics! Notice that the 2003 sobriety challenge says nothing about being pain free! Accept the fact that you will be dealing with pain without pain killers by the end of the tapering process! There are so many weapons at your disposal - use them all. More on those in a follow-up post.
2) We are powerless over substance abuse - We cannot do it alone! This is the basic premise of AA,NA, ect. Asking for help from a doc, a spouse, or others here is not important - IT IS A REQUIREMENT! We should put our tapering plan down on paper or in a spreadsheet/calendar program and then share it with someone, so we will not deviate from it. I showed mine to my wife and said "Heres my plan, help me stick to it!" Letting a medical professional in on the plan is a great way to build an extra security net, and get advice from a pro, of which I am not.
3) Most (not all) agree that Tapering is easier than cold-turkey! Tell ourselves over and over - "If I don't cut my dose, day over day, week over week, what am I setting myself up for?"
The answer of course is something far worse, like in-patient detox, or a week of cold turkey. Which would we prefer? Tapering must be easier. See my next post for how to do the tapering schedule.
4) Your higher power wants to help. Will you let Him? This is potentially the most controversial subject for some here, so-reminder-this is just my opinion. However, all AA/NA programs use this as their core concept. God wants us to be sober, no? If you beleive that, then He already has a plan for your life, and all you have to do is ASK for help. Prayer works folks - I promise it does, and millions of people swear by it. Remember, in the entire history of mankind, it is only in the last 30 years that America and the world has kicked God out of our lives. Before that God was the underlying reason to be living, and was a key concept in the founding of the United States. In the last 3 decaded though, we have been told we can do it ourselves! And look at where we are, what we have become. God is there for you. Turn to face Him, an ask for help.
5) Use the Thomas recipe - it really works!
6) Do the opposite of what we have been doing while using. If we go to this street corner where our dealers are, do the opposite - go as far away as possible! If we go to three docs in one month, go to ZERO docs in one month. If we use at a friends, well is he our friend? Go somewhere else. In other words - let's throw our narcotics-enabling habits away starting right this instant!
7)Dedicate the month of December to this problem if possible. Think of all the things that we do during the holidays, and let's tell ourselves that unless it ABSOLUTELY NECESSARY to do, this month, we're not doing it - NOT adding it to our plate of stuff to do. I know this will be difficult for some. But wherever possible, clear out the **** on your upcoming calendar, and write down the words TAPER TO ZERO in the December calendar in your minds. "This month my number one goal is BECOMING DRUG FREE BY January 1ST!"
8) Once we clear our calendars of unnecessary junk, and focus on Tapering to zero, now we need to stop focusing on it ;-0. Distract your mind and put it on something positive and stress free for you. Exercise, a good book, a movie series, relaxation exercise, ANYTHING! But don't sit around thinking about it, as Methman said "get moving!"
WE CAN SUCCEED TOGETHER GUYS!
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Think of the following analogy:
We are all in a giant dark pit, each of us having his or her own staircase leading upwards. Each staircase is close to someone elses, but you must climb your own staircase. Some us have staircases that start close to the top and are not steep at all, with easy-to-climb steps. Others have staircases that start almost at rock bottom, almost in pitch black darkness, and start out very steep with hugs steps. And each staircase is ever-changing, with the steps getting larger, then smaller, slippery, then moving left and right, then becoming straight, and easy. Someone may be starting to fall next to you, when their staircase starts moving or gets hairy - catch them and set them to climbing again.
All staircases, though lead to the same door at the top, from which comes this beautiful glistening sunlight, shining like nothing you have ever seen. On the top of the door is a sign that reads "YOUR LIFE". We can see the top and would give everything we own to get there. If we don't start climbing today, we don't move. But we can also see that the steps get easier near the top.
Some of us will not be able to make it up the huge steps without help and encouragement from the others next to us. Helping someone else up their staircase gives you added strength to climb your own, and we all want to walk through the door at the top on Jan 1st, 2003, or sooner. Those that reach that door sooner MUST help the others still climbing, doing everything they can not to fall over the edge, and then have to start over again.
Good luck and God's Power to all - I will have some follow up posts with details on how to build your taper schedule.
Time to reclaim our lives!
GO!
Rex
This is NOT my plan - this is OUR plan - Right?
Rex
Think of two anchor points:
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START - Your dosage today
END - Your dosage on Jan 1st - ZERO
(Note, you may want to change the end date to something sooner. If so, build your schedule from today to whatever you pick as your end date)
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Rather than think about this upcoming week first, go to Jan 1 and build backwards. You must decide, along with your doctor or person who is helping you, what that last week on your meds will look like, but it should be as low as possible, perhaps 1.5 or 1 pill/drug dose per day.
Example: .5 tablets of Vicodin three times a day.
Here's an example of a Vicodin schedule, again working backwards from Jan 1st, 2003. Adjust accordingly for Percs, Meth, ect!
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December 22 23 24 5 26 27 28
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dose/day 2 2 1 1 1 1 .5
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December 15 16 17 18 19 20 21
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dose/day 3 3 2.5 2.5 2 2 2
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December 8 9 10 11 12 13 14
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dose/day 6 6 5 5 4 4 4
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December 1 2 3 4 5 6 7
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dose/day 9 9 8 8 7 7 6
OK, so there's an extra 3 days at the end of week 4 where you may want to be effectively at ZERO on these days, where many will be off of work, Dec 29th, 30th, and 31st. But you may need to use the days as a fudge factor, that is, either to accelerate or catch up if your drift from your schedule.
Summary points;
* Plug in your own numbers based on your two anchor points
* Build backwards from Jan 1st, 2003 to today.
* Design your schedule for a very slow taper during the final week
* Share this schedule with someone who will help you/force you to stick to it.
* Please let someone here now that YOU HAVE ACCEPTED! A post to I Accept might be good. That way, your committed....
CELEBRATE YOUR SUCCESSES HERE WITH EVERYONE ELSE!
You will be pleased to see that at the end of every week, you took less than the last week!!! You're winning! you will win!
Please post if you additional ideas, or items that have helped you succeed..
Good luck and God's grace to all!
Rex
I start today!
Rex
Please give us any suggestions you have on our plan, from a professional point of view.
Rex
For BodyMechanic ..... I am really curious. Is this 5 day medicine supposed to get you off of ultram as well? I don't mean to be sceptical, but 5 days dosen't seem long enough. At least not for ultram. If a medicine naturally takes 3 weeks to leave your system, how would a 5 day drug be able to do it?
The concept is simply to make a committment along with the rest of us to accomplish a set goal. So for you, if you ca'nt get to zero, how about to 25% or even 50% of your dosage today.
You can do that right? And so at the end of the month you will have made real progress..
Please join us...
Rex
I think it may have something to do with pressure - I know it does for me. I feel pressure with my job and supporting my family and all, and the pills are a way to not feel the pressure, if even for a hour or so.
I think we would all be suprised if we knew how many here were actually considered to be the silent responsible types...
Anyway, I respect your wishes - let me know if I can help, even if all you need is cheerleading. Seeing a dr can only help.
One last temptation though. Imagine if what you thought you couldn't do, you actually can do! Damn the torpedos - full speed ahead I say.
Just go for it - we'll help.
Rex
I found myself in a situation similar to your where I had been using ultram long enough to develope an addiction. I anticipated that this might be a problem and I stopped taking ulram for a month prior to this detox. During that time I used hydrocodone never(almost) exceeding 60-80mg a day. Today I am on day 4 of the detox and I woke up this morning knowing the worst is over. I still have 2 more days of buprenorphine left so I expect to be even better by then. Unless I am badly mistaken, this has been by far the easiest drug withdrawal I have ever done.
Lisabet
Places that use buprenophine are not easy to find but they do exist even in the south. Your computer and telephone will help you locate one. Post your state and maybe someone on the board will know of an office near where you live.
How many vicodin pills did you need to get off ultram? 60 to 80mil is how many vicodins and at what strength? Just trying to figure out what I will need. I'm taking 150mil of ultram a day.
This wednesday I'm seeing my doctor and laying it on the line .... I hope it dosen't backfire. I'm just going to ask to change to vicodin. He did it once before ... but I didn't want to keep using it. Anyway .... sounds like it took a month for you to get off ultram. Good luck to you ... treasure your sobriety.
Lord knows it's a precious gift .... Goldie
I like your idea. I am not ready to go totally off, and cold turkey I don't think is good for what I take, but I do committ to taking 25% less starting today. It's a start.
Thanks for caring and also to everyone else in here.