There are a couple majorMajor tears
Major-con differences. In NA there are people there who were on all types of drugsChemical dependence - resources
Chemotherapy
Drug abuse
Drug abuse and dependence
Drug abuse first aid
Drug allergies
Drug induced hypertension
Drug rash on the back
Drug rash, tegretol
Drug signs and teenagers
Drug-induced hypertension, heroinDrug abuse etc..for some people that can be scary. I know alot of people who are afraid to go to some meetings just because they are little old lady's addicted to pills and feel the NA meetings are filled with hardcore drugChemical dependence - resources
Chemotherapy
Drug abuse
Drug abuse and dependence
Drug abuse first aid
Drug allergies
Drug induced hypertension
Drug rash on the back
Drug rash, tegretol
Drug signs and teenagers
Drug-induced hypertension users and biker's etc..their words not mine. Most times people at NA meetings are long time drugChemical dependence - resources
Chemotherapy
Drug abuse
Drug abuse and dependence
Drug abuse first aid
Drug allergies
Drug induced hypertension
Drug rash on the back
Drug rash, tegretol
Drug signs and teenagers
Drug-induced hypertension users who chose to go out on the street to purchase drugsChemical dependence - resources
Chemotherapy
Drug abuse
Drug abuse and dependence
Drug abuse first aid
Drug allergies
Drug induced hypertension
Drug rash on the back
Drug rash, tegretol
Drug signs and teenagers
Drug-induced hypertension to get high. Now at the PA meetings you find alot of Mommy's, grandma's, regular old Joe's who would never get drugsChemical dependence - resources
Chemotherapy
Drug abuse
Drug abuse and dependence
Drug abuse first aid
Drug allergies
Drug induced hypertension
Drug rash on the back
Drug rash, tegretol
Drug signs and teenagers
Drug-induced hypertension on the street and innocently got addicted to prescription pills not because they chose to go purchase a drugChemical dependence - resources
Chemotherapy
Drug abuse
Drug abuse and dependence
Drug abuse first aid
Drug allergies
Drug induced hypertension
Drug rash on the back
Drug rash, tegretol
Drug signs and teenagers
Drug-induced hypertension to change the way they felt. But ultimately abused a drugChemical dependence - resources
Chemotherapy
Drug abuse
Drug abuse and dependence
Drug abuse first aid
Drug allergies
Drug induced hypertension
Drug rash on the back
Drug rash, tegretol
Drug signs and teenagers
Drug-induced hypertension they felt was safeSafe driving for teens
Safe sex because a Dr prescribed it. I love PA meetings they are specific to my problem and everybody there is addicted to painAbdominal pain
Abdominal pain diagnosis
Acupuncture and pain
Ankle pain
Anterior knee pain
Back pain - low
Bone pain or tenderness
Breast pain
Causes of painful intercourse
Chest pain
Chronic pain - resources medicationAllergic reactions to medication
Drug allergies
Drug-induced hypertension
Getting a prescription filled
Home pharmacy
Inhaler medication administration, xanaxXanax
Xanax xr etc..I will go to NA meetings because I am still an addict and if I need to be among a group of people for support I can still find support there. PA is fairly new and I know in my state of AZ we have several meetings now. They are pretty small most nights and I absolutely feel like the people there know exactly what I am going through. The other difference is that at PA alot of people are still people with chronicAcute vs. chronic conditions
Addison’s disease
Anemia of chronic disease
Cause of chronic bronchitis
Chronic bronchitis
Chronic cholecystitis
Chronic fatigue syndrome
Chronic fatigue syndrome - resources
Chronic lymphocytic leukemia (cll)
Chronic lymphocytic leukemia - microscopic view
Chronic motor tic disorder painAbdominal pain
Abdominal pain diagnosis
Acupuncture and pain
Ankle pain
Anterior knee pain
Back pain - low
Bone pain or tenderness
Breast pain
Causes of painful intercourse
Chest pain
Chronic pain - resources issues and so at certain meetings we discuss that and I have been given great refferals to Dr's and such offering alternative therapies for painAbdominal pain
Abdominal pain diagnosis
Acupuncture and pain
Ankle pain
Anterior knee pain
Back pain - low
Bone pain or tenderness
Breast pain
Causes of painful intercourse
Chest pain
Chronic pain - resources. Either way you will get support but PA may offer support more specific to your needs. I don't know where you live but I highly recemmend you try one or several PA meetings. You really get to know the people there because they are a bit smaller and I love to see some of the people there who have nine years sobriety. the thing is at alot of the meetings it seems as if everybody is right out of detox or has a couple months so at firstFirst progesterone mc10
First progesterone mc5
First-progesterone vgs 200
First-progesterone vgs 400 I was a little scared that getting off pills was impossible. But a couple of the meetings have the long timers. Also there is one guy who is always throwing this statistic around, he says do you know only 1% of us will make it and not relapse, I hate when he says that because it discouraged me at firstFirst progesterone mc10
First progesterone mc5
First-progesterone vgs 200
First-progesterone vgs 400 thinking well then why bother. I have asked him not to say that because it is not true. After talking to many addictionologists I know the percent is much higher but he continues to say it anyway. I think he discourages new comers. So you weed through those peopel and find most peopel are awesome and helpful. Again I just think if you are only addicted to pills then PA is the perfectPerfect choice place, they deal with issues closer to your own. Like finding new Dr's, painAbdominal pain
Abdominal pain diagnosis
Acupuncture and pain
Ankle pain
Anterior knee pain
Back pain - low
Bone pain or tenderness
Breast pain
Causes of painful intercourse
Chest pain
Chronic pain - resources etc..Good Luck

one thing about na is they do not focous on any particular drugChemical dependence - resources
Chemotherapy
Drug abuse
Drug abuse and dependence
Drug abuse first aid
Drug allergies
Drug induced hypertension
Drug rash on the back
Drug rash, tegretol
Drug signs and teenagers
Drug-induced hypertension.

we  in na focous on ourselves, we are the problem.

take away the drugsChemical dependence - resources
Chemotherapy
Drug abuse
Drug abuse and dependence
Drug abuse first aid
Drug allergies
Drug induced hypertension
Drug rash on the back
Drug rash, tegretol
Drug signs and teenagers
Drug-induced hypertension and we still have to deal with why we used.

it's not what we used that makes us addicts but why we used.

it reminds me of something my father spoke to me about his early

days in aa , people there would seperate themselves with what they drank beer drinkers over in that corner, wiskey drinkers over there, wine drinker there , ectAbortion - elective or therapeutic
Acute cytomegalovirus (cmv) infection
Acute hiv infection
Adenoid removal
Adrenalectomy
Advanced care directives
Anorectal fistulas
Aortic dissection
Appendectomy
Appendectomy - series
Artery cut section , ectAbortion - elective or therapeutic
Acute cytomegalovirus (cmv) infection
Acute hiv infection
Adenoid removal
Adrenalectomy
Advanced care directives
Anorectal fistulas
Aortic dissection
Appendectomy
Appendectomy - series
Artery cut section.

i found the same delema in na in the 70's herion addicts in one corner, speed freaks in the other corner, pill headsHead and face reconstruction
Head injury
Head lice
Indications of head injury
Radial head injury over there.

and pot headsHead and face reconstruction
Head injury
Head lice
Indications of head injury
Radial head injury where just looked at and asked what they were doing there. not a pretty site.



i have come to beleive that addictionDrug abuse and dependence is all about seperation

where ever you find seperation , wether it be the seperation of famly's , or split presonalities , when we seprearate ourselves

from the rest of society as addicts.

the word diabolic in its origonal greek  comes from dia-boline

which means to seperate, the oppisite of synboline which means

to put together.

the prefex dia means 2 , which is the splitting of 1.

one is to be whole or holy, so the solution is unity.

the word attonement brokenBroken bone
Broken or knocked out tooth down is   AT -ONE- MENT  to be one

with everyone else through dropping our seperations.

by asking for forgivness



anyway i could go on and on



peace   hippy





***@****

Thanks for continueing to post, I know it takes up your time but you've helped me a great deal. I over heard one of my kids telling my wife that daddy has been in a better mood lately.



I owe it to the participants of this forum!

Teeitup!

congrats on the good humor, teeitup ...



NA! What a concept! The best thing about the NA meetings I attended were the tatoos on the women! There was a woman in one of my NA groups who had a stylized Egyptian snakeSnake bite
Snake bite on the finger tattoo running the length of her gorgeous body. I'm afraid all I could think about in THAT NA meeting was that tattoo.



My other NA meeting was dominated by one or two guys who were, as far as I could tell, irretrievably pissed off that they were heroinDrug abuse addicts. Never sat through so much angerIslets of langerhans
Ovarian cancer dangers
Pancreatic islet cell tumor in my life. I had to make myself transparent and let it all flow through me or I wouldn't have made it through those meetings.



The secretary of my other, other NA meeting began each meeting by telling us how she put a .357 magnum to her headHead and face reconstruction
Head injury
Head lice
Indications of head injury
Radial head injury that morning and tested how far she could pull backBack pain - low
Back strain treatment the trigger without the hammer dropping.



I can understand why a lot of people would be more comfortable in pills anon. In my case, I must confess that I am much more of a mind with my NA associates (except those really angry ones). I have always used drugsChemical dependence - resources
Chemotherapy
Drug abuse
Drug abuse and dependence
Drug abuse first aid
Drug allergies
Drug induced hypertension
Drug rash on the back
Drug rash, tegretol
Drug signs and teenagers
Drug-induced hypertension because I loved them. Scoring from a doctor was just a big, expensive, time-consuming, demeaning and galactically boring painAbdominal pain
Abdominal pain diagnosis
Acupuncture and pain
Ankle pain
Anterior knee pain
Back pain - low
Bone pain or tenderness
Breast pain
Causes of painful intercourse
Chest pain
Chronic pain - resources in the ass. So I stopped pretending to be a good guy and just did what I had to do. And I didn't (and still don't) feel a bit guilty about it. I don't think my attitude would win the day at a pill anon meeting ... probably no featured speaker gig for me at PA. Besides, I'd probably want to tell them about the tattooed NA girl, and how much I'd give to be the one who gave her that tattoo.



Thomas

This is great info guys - thanks sincerely.



The smaller meetings part is probably the key for me. I suffer from PanicPanic disorder
Panic disorder with agoraphobia attacks in large groups, especially if I have to speak. (And yes, I do know this is likely the key cause for using to begin with...)



As a rec alkie, it seemed I spent a lot of time in AA meetings listening to folks ***** about their neighbors dog, or the comment about the 357 magnum. While it is in my heartCongenital heart disease
Cor pulmonale
Coronary heart disease
Cyanotic heart disease
Depression and heart disease
Heart attack
Heart attack first aid
Heart attack symptoms
Heart bypass surgery
Heart bypass surgery - series
Heart disease to help those folks if I can, I need something a little bit closer to home for the helping me part. ChronicAcute vs. chronic conditions
Addison’s disease
Anemia of chronic disease
Cause of chronic bronchitis
Chronic bronchitis
Chronic cholecystitis
Chronic fatigue syndrome
Chronic fatigue syndrome - resources
Chronic lymphocytic leukemia (cll)
Chronic lymphocytic leukemia - microscopic view
Chronic motor tic disorder painAbdominal pain
Abdominal pain diagnosis
Acupuncture and pain
Ankle pain
Anterior knee pain
Back pain - low
Bone pain or tenderness
Breast pain
Causes of painful intercourse
Chest pain
Chronic pain - resources folks, like those here, seem to have a lot in commonCommon cold.



PA sounded good, but I just didn't know what to expect at a meeting.



I am going to try next week, but, God willing, will still be here if you all haven't signed a petition to have me banned ;-).  (WILL someboby PLEASE SHUT HIM UP? )



Rex

I think i'm at risk. No, I KNOW i'm at risk to become addicted to pills that make me feel hmmmm...hmmm...good!



I maybe allready addicted to pills. These pills i have been taking for the last 7 years. Rivotril they are called. Are they in the benzo familly or something? I don't know much about pills, i just take them when they r prescribed.



These rivotril pills were prescribed to me 7 years ago when i started having panick attacks. The doc also gave me Zoloft and then changed to EffexorEffexor
Effexor xr a few years backBack pain - low
Back strain treatment. I stopped EffexorEffexor
Effexor xr, cold turkey, 2 months ago. Really weird withdrawl about 2 weeks, but i stuck to it. Life hasn't been easy, and i guess i did get depressed, so that is the reason for the pills.



But the last few months, i didn't feel that bad for depressionAdolescent depression
Bipolar disorder
Depression
Depression - elderly
Depression - resources
Depression among the elderly
Depression and heart disease
Depression and insomnia
Depression and men
Depression and the menstrual cycle
Depression in children.

Even been seeing a phsycologist and it helps...a bit.



Sometimes i get this real deep feeling to just take anything that could give me a high or to dull the emptiness in my soul. I drink a bit, when this happens, but i don't like the taste of alcoholAlcohol and diet
Alcoholism
Alcoholism - resources
Breath alcohol test
Delirium tremens
Fetal alcohol syndrome, and my mom has been an alcoholic for the past 35 years, so i just have 1 or 2 drinks, just enough to feel a slight buzz. And yes, i do mix the Rivotril with the alcoholAlcohol and diet
Alcoholism
Alcoholism - resources
Breath alcohol test
Delirium tremens
Fetal alcohol syndrome. I don't care at this point.



I don't even know if the Rivotril is addicting. I know that i have to tripleTriple antibiotic
Triple paste
Triple sulfa topical
Triple x pediculicide my dose, just to get a slight feeling of calmness.



2 years ago, i had backBack pain - low
Back strain treatment surgeryAbdominal wall surgery
Before and after corneal surgery
Brain surgery
Carotid artery surgery
Carotid artery surgery - series
Cataract removal
Cataract surgery - series
Cervical cryosurgery
Cervix treatment - cryosurgery
Congenital heart defect corrective surgery
Corneal surgery. Was on morphine pump for 4 days. What a cool feeling! Went home with a drugChemical dependence - resources
Chemotherapy
Drug abuse
Drug abuse and dependence
Drug abuse first aid
Drug allergies
Drug induced hypertension
Drug rash on the back
Drug rash, tegretol
Drug signs and teenagers
Drug-induced hypertension prescription. Has only enough for a week. Tried to renew the script with doc, but he was not available. (Neurosurgon in big city hospital).



Last week, i had really bad cramping so went to the er. They tested and told me i had IBSRibs and lung anatomy
Ultrasound, normal fetus - spine and ribs. (IrritableIrritable bowel syndrome BowelBowel incontinence
Bowel transit time
Constipation
Crohn's disease
Diarrhea
Ileus - x-ray of bowel distension
Ileus - x-ray of distended bowel and stomach
Inflammatory bowel disease
Intestinal obstruction
Irritable bowel syndrome
Large bowel resection Syndrome). Was allowed DemerolDemerol hcl. I asked for it as many times as i could. Even when the cramping had gone away after 48hrs, i still asked for the DemerolDemerol hcl, it was such a good feeling!



Been out of the hospital for 4 days. I keep thinking about that good feeling with the DemerolDemerol hcl and i'm trying real hard to restrain from going to any doc to ask for a painkiller that ressembles this Dermerol, even if now, my crampsAbdominal pain
Leg pain
Muscle cramps
Painful menstrual periods
Relief of menstrual cramps r tolerable. (When i want or need something, i'll do anything to get it)



I've found this forum. Read alot of the posts. I feel like i'm just about to cross the fine line and become addicted. I know now, by reading all the posts, that in the longrun, it would not be of any help, but geez...it's just gnawing away at me right now.



I've managed to stop myself from finding a doc for a prescription, for now. What's helped me alot, and i really mean ALOT...is reading all of your posts.



Why am i writing today?



Well, i feel so on the edge, that i think that maybe, just maybe, if i confide in someone, anyone, about my weaknessWeakness for these types of drugsChemical dependence - resources
Chemotherapy
Drug abuse
Drug abuse and dependence
Drug abuse first aid
Drug allergies
Drug induced hypertension
Drug rash on the back
Drug rash, tegretol
Drug signs and teenagers
Drug-induced hypertension, maybe i won't cross that fine line.



Thanks for listening.

Can you e-mail me at ***@****?  I need to discuss something with you.  Thanks.

O, you mean that fine line you passed about 100 miles ago?



You're like me, in that I truly fell in love with opiates, felt that they filled a hole somewhere in my psyche, although I've never determined what that hole is really about. The firstFirst progesterone mc10
First progesterone mc5
First-progesterone vgs 200
First-progesterone vgs 400 opiate I used at age 17 was propoxyphenePropoxyphene
Propoxyphene compound 65, a very low-grade painAbdominal pain
Abdominal pain diagnosis
Acupuncture and pain
Ankle pain
Anterior knee pain
Back pain - low
Bone pain or tenderness
Breast pain
Causes of painful intercourse
Chest pain
Chronic pain - resources killer but chemically related to methadone. That firstFirst progesterone mc10
First progesterone mc5
First-progesterone vgs 200
First-progesterone vgs 400 night was akin to a religious experience and changed me forever. In both our cases, addictionDrug abuse and dependence came firstFirst progesterone mc10
First progesterone mc5
First-progesterone vgs 200
First-progesterone vgs 400, with tolerance and dependenceAlcoholism
Chemical dependence - resources
Drug abuse and dependence following. The Rovotril you're using is KlonopinKlonopin
Klonopin wafer, a long acting benzo (Valium class drugChemical dependence - resources
Chemotherapy
Drug abuse
Drug abuse and dependence
Drug abuse first aid
Drug allergies
Drug induced hypertension
Drug rash on the back
Drug rash, tegretol
Drug signs and teenagers
Drug-induced hypertension). KlonopinKlonopin
Klonopin wafer is another very addictive 'pleasure' drugChemical dependence - resources
Chemotherapy
Drug abuse
Drug abuse and dependence
Drug abuse first aid
Drug allergies
Drug induced hypertension
Drug rash on the back
Drug rash, tegretol
Drug signs and teenagers
Drug-induced hypertension. Taper off the Rivotril. Don't abruptly discontinue it.



The difference between us is that you're looking for a solution now. I've been chasing the ultimate high for 30 years until now I think it might just be chasing me. I can't undo 30 years of opiate and benzo use. But you're not even at the point where you're experiencing withdrawalDelirium tremens. I advise you to seek psychologicalChild neglect and psychological abuse help to determine why you feel such a compulsion to cop these highs. It isn't just that they feel so good, although your familyBirth control and family planning
Choosing a primary care provider
Ewing’s sarcoma
Family troubles - resources history could make you susceptible to mind-altering drugsChemical dependence - resources
Chemotherapy
Drug abuse
Drug abuse and dependence
Drug abuse first aid
Drug allergies
Drug induced hypertension
Drug rash on the back
Drug rash, tegretol
Drug signs and teenagers
Drug-induced hypertension (history of alcoholismAlcoholism
Alcoholism - resources, etc). There's something you're trying to "fix" with these chemicals, whippet. Find out what it is, and, chances are, they'll be a simpler, healthier solution. Keep on with what you're doing, and you'll wind up a lifelong junkie like me. As the Marque de Sade once said to a priest, "You've only read about Hell. I've been there." Best of luck.



Thomas

Oooookayyyyy...



Read your post, reread mine.

Again, read your post.

Again, read mine.



Do i seem a little...f***up?



Can't argue with you, after a good long think, i thunk i am a little over that fine line.



Ok, i admitt, i'm hooked.

Now, i best get my ass over to the psy and dig deep to find the reason why i need to numb.



Thanks Thomas02, i needed a good dose of reality.



Scared straight if i have to let go of the only pills i have left. Don't know if i can handle that right now.

don't get rid of the pills you have left. That's an empty gesture at best and will just make your situation that much more desperate. What I said to you is not gospel. It's just what I get out of your original post. You sound like someone whose fallen in love with narcs and needs to decide whether to stop now or go all the way. If the shrink isn't the solution, then find another. But you've really got the passion, my friend, and that will drive you to the ends of the Earth if need be.



Thomas

so is there any one who has info on PA,

me i have never been to a pa meeting,

here in the philly area they have CA,

never been to one of them either.

over the years , i have noticed that  most people who

went to more than one fellowship did not make it.

it seem ,s to work better when people commit to one place

and get involved with a home group. and get to know people

and let them get to know us.

all these places have the 12 steps and that is the meat and potatoes of the programs, tho fellowship with other s is

a strong plus, sorta like being part of a gang.

there are different approches to the 12 steps, when someone mentions  one we are so quick to disagree, well i have put my footAthlete's foot
Athlete's foot, tinea pedis
Clubfoot
Clubfoot deformity
Clubfoot repair
Clubfoot repair - series
Diabetes foot care
Diabetic blood circulation in foot
Diabetic foot care
Erythema toxicum on the foot
Foot pain in my mouthMouth sores
Oral cancer too many times over the years, these days i try to just take it all in and be nice.

as far as speaking in front of people goes , that comes after we break the ice,best to talk about  today when speaking and talk

about the truth, the truth is the most interisting thing in the world, olover north told the truth about lying and it facinated the country.