Addicted to and getting off painkillers

Question

New to this forum and would love the support.  Been taking painkillers off and mostly on for about 7 years.  I go to a "pain management doctor" who prescribes 15 5mg oxycodone - before I decided to leave him one year ago and try to get clean I was taking 12, 15mg - so my dosage is much lower.  It's the easiest and cheapest way to continue this addiction although I do have chronic pain - but don't we all.  I have been diagnosed with fibromyalgia and used to be a personal trainer - however, I do zero exercise now and just work alot.  I'm smart enough to know that if I took better care ofmyself that I would feel alot better, but at this point I take the pills, I think about the pills, getting them, running out and what excuses I might have to tell the dr if I run out early, which happens ALOT!  I'm so over myself already!  I tried to get clean most recently with an addiction specialist who put me on subox....(dont remember exact name) - I felt awful, probably should have stuck with it, but didn't and ran right back to my dr.  I was a "recovered" addict years and years ago, meaning that everyone and I mean everyone in my life EXCEPT for my husband knows NOTHING about this problem.  I could NEVER EVER share this with my children much less the people/job.  What's my options?  I can't just go into rehab, disappear for awhile with no questions asked - which is why i tried this other doctor.  I try to wean - and thats just a joke - I don't even have the willpower to cut down when I know that I am running out. Would love to talk......

paiiin · Answer

Hey im 33 been taking vicdin for 10 years and find it difficult to get off them i get aches in my legs and arms and my head is in the clouds just thinkin bout vics i have terrible bathroom problems my whole body is achey i cant stand it especially when i run out i want murder someone i get very angry PLEASE anyone that can help..............

badj8998 · Answer

Hey all you out there like me,just wanted to say myself been on painkillers for allmost 25 years.Last 5 im taking 20MG oxy and 2 10 MG  valium for back and leg nerve pain.I really wish i never had the first one but also hope the pills nerver stop coming.the worst is when im out, i find myself running to the pharmacy to get some nyquil or night time cold medicen.all i can say is if your trying to quit or out, that stuff eases most of the DTox symtoms.I really feel for anyone else thats hooked on pills.It just plain sucks.Tootles

badj8998 · Answer

Hey all you out there like me,just wanted to say myself been on painkillers for allmost 25 years.Last 5 im taking 20MG oxy and 2 10 MG  valium for back and leg nerve pain.I really wish i never had the first one but also hope the pills nerver stop coming.the worst is when im out, i find myself running to the pharmacy to get some nyquil or night time cold medicen.all i can say is if your trying to quit or out, that stuff eases most of the DTox symtoms.I really feel for anyone else thats hooked on pills.It just plain sucks.Tootles

frannyritt · Answer

able to talk for a moment - what i really need is advice - what is the best way?  is it at all possible to do this on my own, at home, if totally have to have "the flu" for couple of days - is it even realistic?  Or how about that rapid detox - i heard of a place in Florida that actually was on the dr. phil show.  anyone heard of that?

frannyritt · Answer

Thanks for responding - at least i know i'm finally in right place to talk.  I do want to stop - I'm sick of myself, but as strong as that feeling is - i don't....or i'm terrified of what i need to go thru and truthfully - its so easy and inexpensive with this dr i have.  i once did go thru rehab and that was because i was buying them on the streets, living with my two daughters and was completely out of control, money ran out, finally hit a bottom.  I really want to keep typing and hear responses but i am at work and i keep hiding this screen, so will come back on tonight. thanks to all!

ThursdayNext · Answer

Willpower is smoke.  One moment it is there and the next it's not.  As a personal trainer you know that you have to have the right combination of excersice, food, rest, etc. to create the body you want.  You say you are recovering addict.  What's the connection.  If you were dealing with a client that came to you out of shape after working so hard to get into shape wouldn't you ask what's the connection.  I think you should look for that.  Stop beating yourself up.  It's not helpful to the situation your in.  Being in pain is exhausting enough.  Take care of one thing at a time. The first issue at hand is why you don't want to stop taking them.  The second issue is we don't just wake up one morning and stop.  It's gradual.  Just like changing someone's body.  You can't do that without working on their head as well.  Maybe you should treat yourself with the kindness and respect you show your clients. 
Hour #3 of tapering off.

bugsy89734 · Answer

Hi fran,,I too am an addict,,med proffessional and an addict,,well,,I am on day 5 of clean living and I think the worst is over ,,,90mgs hydo,,60-90 morphine and 4-6 soma daily was my recipe for failure,,,anyways ,,I am lucky right now because I was hurt at work 2 weeks ago and I am on WC right now until I go back to work next week,,so I decided to squash the devil now when i had time off,,,you can not work through immediate withdrawls,,at least I could'nt,,,,the vomiting the first two days was atrocious,,anyways all the sweats,,ha's,,stomach pains,,vomiting,,no appetite,,SLEEPLESS nights,,ect ect ect,,slowly improve after day 4,,,I am currently in day 5 of recovery and when I fell weak I write in this forum,,people are great here,,,,stay strong make a decision and go through with it,,it does get better,,I am a prime exp in day 5,,,take care,,,,bugzzzzz

Addicted to and getting off painkillers

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