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Avatar universal

I am scared now.......any advice?

Hey everyone....I was scared to get on this site at work, I work at a call center, they do monitorings and can see what websites you are on! Well, I was getting on anyway, when I'd feel I need to talk to someone! Today, one of my supervisors sent through to me a message asking me to move stations cause she couldn't hear me, and I was in the middle of writing a post!!! Then all my supervisors gathered in her office!!!Now, I am so scared that they know about my addiction, I wanted to tell them but was so afraid of getting fired I was waiting til I could say " hey I haven't done anything in 6 months" or something like that!!! Noone has said anything, but now I'm afraid their not going to come through with training me on the new accounts so I can get a raise!! Do you think that their looking down on me??? I really hope not, I may just be paranoid!! But it was a coincidence how they all gathered in the office, and one of my co-workers that's a boss's pet....kept looking at me funny??? I would lose my mind if I lost this job, they have picked me up through my worst, and has held onto me when they could have easily fired me for my screw ups!!! I don't know what to think!! I see we haven't had any smart a**es getting on talking ****....that's a good thing!! Help guys...what should I think or do? Should I go be honest about the situation...I never had to take a drug test to work here, should I just tell them? or continue to keep up good work! my boss just came to me yesterday and told me he was proud of me for doing so well the past week and a half!!! lost and confused
strictly me
5 Responses
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Avatar universal
try not to worry, if they ask just be honest  maybe they just wanted you closer, he /she must like your work to tell you that so maybe all will be well goodluck and just act likenothing has changed! oh wait is this in the addiction catagory? lol maybe some us talk about other stuff to get our minds off of it
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
well, i think you'll be ok.
if they'd seen the forum you were posting to, and wanted to fire you, i think they just would have done it,. and not bothered to simply "move you closer".  

You might re-think posting in here again at work, because possibly they simply don't want you doing that again. And honestly, they are in their rights to do so. If they're paying you to work, and you're not working, then you can be fired. Unfortunately, it's as simple as that.

Good luck. Don't let yourself get stressed out about it. Like i said, i think if they wanted you gone, you'd be gone already.


BNB
Helpful - 0
149087 tn?1258453820
Hi. First off do you have a legit script from the docs saying that they prescribe these meds to you, or do you buy them off the street? If you get them legit, and come clean about it, it may not be that bad. I think though if you get them off the streets its going to be harder to explain.

If it were me, I would go to the main boss and explain the situation. Tell them that you are tired of taking pills. ( I dont remember what you are taking or how much) and that you have found somewhere to reach out for help. Explain to them that you are trying hard to be clean. How many days do you have clean now KMH? However many tell them that.

Perhaps you could also suggest that they can test you anytime they feel the need, just to make sure you are staying clean. That would be kind of like and incentative sort of thing. Like 'hey if you dont believe me or trust me, then test me' Prove to them and to yourself that you can beat this thing.

You know that everyone here is behind you 100% and more.

Whatever you decide to do please keep us updated. Take care and try not to stress too much over it...
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Hey...thanks guys!! I don't think they asked me to move to get me closer, they didn't tell me where to sit at, but the voice logger at work has been messing up lately they couldn't hear me on my calls that's why they asked me to move!! I was having a hard day today, the one guy had me so ticked on here it was horrible, I messed up today, I'm going to be honest, after I came home I stressed cause my daughter had a doc's appt. and I don't drive (which her doc is in the same neighborhood as the pills....errr so mad at myself) And I was upset crying over everything, scared about work, upset about our financial situation right now, my emotions are going crazy, etc. and someone was there while i was crying and gave me some oxycodine...only 2-5mg...but it doesn't matter. I should have been strong enough to say no. Now I feel even worse and have been crying more cause I'm so upset at myself now, 9 days down the drain :( tear tear!!! So tomarrow I start ALL OVER again, I hope that it wasn't enough to make me seriously w/d again?? But yea I guess I should stay off of the site while at work, but your right if they were going to fire me I would have been fired, they've given me ALOT of chances there, and I was messing up alot for a minute there, with the fact of the pill habit and the girl who was babysitting 4 me screwed me over ALOT...wouldn't show up, or be 2-3 hours late, it was something or another every week, my bf bro/(who's our roommate) is babysitting for me right now! I feel like **** right now...thinking about it now, I don't think I will be able to mess up again....it feels worse then getting off of them (besides the withdrawls) but my gut is all knotted up, my mind is going wild, and my emotions are trampling me right now, I can't go through all of this!!! I was so positive the other day about life, and I knew I wouldn't fall....but I knew i'd have good days and bad.
Many regrets today....strictly me
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I wouldn't worry.  It's clear from your posting that you are working to get off drugs not stay on them.  Your not looking at stuff you should'nt or buying stuff you shouldn't.  If they do come to you tell them exactly what you posted.  This place has pulled you through.  Let them know how you got started and why you want to stop.  Relax it'll all be okay. I used to work in a call center.  If your making the numbers that's all they care about.
Helpful - 0
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