Hi Hun;
First let me say WAY TO GO on your clean time..it is NOT easy,,omg..far far from easy. The post from this person is not worth your thoughts.
You KNOW how you feel, I know how you feel, we ALL know how you feel. Her post was nothing, and she does NOT know how it feels. Plain and simple.
Do not allow that post to get you down. I have failed a taper 4 times now, and I feel horrible, yes. But I will be damned if I let HER bring me even more down.
One day maybe they will understand how it feels, but we can't think about that. Only think about YOU and you getting better hun!
You ARE doing a great job!
I am behind you 100% and so many others are as well!
Stay with us my friend!
Huggs
Tracy

Good Morning,

I am sorry your not sleeping well and I know the feeling was up all night last night and finally fell asleep at 5am and had to get up a 6!  I have a 13 year old who I know I am so cranky with and i feel awful..I dont have a boyfriend or a husband, but that is great that he is supportive of what your going through, I wish I had someone to squeeze me at night so the pain would go away and I could fall asleep, I have some trazadone, which is a sleeping/anti-depressent, but I dont want to take that in fear im mixing something I shouldnt.  But keep your head up..my legs hurt this morning but I know if I take something I will have one more day to try and I dont want that.

Thanks so much for your kind words. I really do appreciate them. I know this is a tough battle and I pray I win. I won't let mommaofpoohbear get me down today. I am erasing her from my mind ;0). I just am hurting this morning!!! The nights are just awful, I am usually such a sound sleeper. I know it is because of the w/ds. It is so hard not to think of the vica's. I might have to have surgery and I am thinking it is good to go off them now. I have such a high tolerance to them and especially over the last 6 weeks I was taking so many per day. I was thinking that if I had surgery then no amount of pain med will help me. I have always had a high tolerance to pain meds and a low tolerance to pain. You all have made me feel very welcome on this board. I am rooting for you vica and helpless 101. I send warm wishes your way and hope you have a peaceful day.
God Bless

I'm so glad you told your husband!!!! It really does make a difference. I'm holding your hand all the way and feeling your pain!!! Day 4 and I feel terrible today as well.  No sleep (as you well know!) and so much weeping and anxiety I really thought I was having a breakdown!!! Feel better evertime I come to this forum we are doing this one day at a time and we are doing a great job!!!!Keep it up and don't let the meaness of some get to you! I think these people are very unhappy and lack compassion for others!  The rest on this forum have been a godsend!!!

Thanks so much! It does help to come on this board. We are both at the same stage of w/d. Damn, I hate it LOL. I am sending hugs to you. I am glad I told my husband and I am so lucky to have him. I erased that poster from my mind, it was just the first post I read at 3:00 am. I was looking for inspiration and support, but I just got a rock thrown at me instead :0). You hang in there too!! I don't cry a lot, but I sure did this morning. I feel like I could cry at the drop of a hat. I am going to physical therapy at 12:30 and I am dreading it. It is so painful and I am used to taking my vics when I come home. God Bless all the great people on this board. I am praying for you all and hope you have a peaceful day.

Ah hun I am really sorry that you are so sore. I am really proud of you for opening up to your husband though. He will more than likely be your main crutch when you need one to lean on, and its also healthier for a relationship when you are totally honest with each other about everything. That way when or if the so called secret gets out of the bag, there is no resentment towards one another.

When you go to your physical therapy, just tell them that you are no longer on your pain meds, and ask them if they could take it a little easier on you. I have had to do that before.

Heres a little story thats happened to me in the past:

Awhile back before I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia, I was going to PT. They could not figure out why I kept on getting these same knots in the same spots day after day. Well one day they got tired of trying to massage them out, so....I kid you not... the nurse took her elbow and placed it on the knot and put all of her body weight on it. You want to talk about peeing your pants. OMG!!! That hurt so freaking bad I was bawling. I went off on them and I never went back. Now fast forward a year. I moved and went to a different PT. From day one before I even layed on that bed of theirs I told them that they better never use their damn elbows on my back EVER or I would deck them, and you know what, I love it there. They are the most understanding and sweetest physical therapists I have ever met.

The key is though, they dont know how much pain you are in, or where it hurts the most, unless you speak up and tell them. More than likely, if they are worth their license then they will listen and treat you the way they should without hurting you further.

And for heavens sake, please dont let mamapoohbears post bring you down. Just as I said before, at her 24th hour of being clean she was thanking you all for help, then oddly enough at her 25th hour she was a totally different person.

Perhaps the withdrawls had started in on her and she was gettin bitc*y...HAHA Karma sucks, and hopefully she gets what she deserves soon enough. I know that is mean to say, but hey, she had no compassion or feelings for anyone when she came in here and opened her big old rud a** mouth spoutin off.

So you just ignore her ok and hang in there, because believe it or not look all around you, there are more of us who are cheering you on and less of those who are trying to bring you down. Take care and get some rest after your therapy appointment, and take my advice, ask them to be a little more gentle with you today because you are more tender than usual.
Take care, and try to have a better day,
Aurora

You made me smile!! I did tell the therapist that I was in a lot of pain. He went a little easy on me. He is a real sweet guy and I can tell by his eyes how gentle he is. I am sad to say I went back on meds and I am going to taper off. I will win this war :0), especially because of this board.

I was just very weepy this morning and mommaofpoohbear was the first post I read. I am new to this board and I know I have been moaning and groaning alot. It was like she was typing at me. I think she might be starting the w/ds. I also think that you were absolutly right to call her on it. I thought she was a regular. Oh well, I am over that :0).

We are supposed to get alot of snow tomorrow. Brrrr it is cold out there. People laugh at me, but I really can smell snow. My husband used to laugh until one day I told him it was going to snow, he laughed and told me it was not even in the forcast. LOL, it started snowing ten minutes later. Now he has me go out on the porch and tell him if it will snow. LOL

I hope all is well with you today and you have a peaceful night.

Warm wishes your way,
Mariyah