wow. nobody here.

Question

Well fine then. I guess everybody is out on a saturday nite x-cept me. My birthday too. What an exciting life I lead.

amythist2779 · Answer

Hi there. You are fairly new and I have not introduced myself yet. I am Aurora and been around the site since about the end of October. I dont post comments often because Im not the gabby type most of the time, but I thought I would atleast say HAPPY BIRTHDAY and good luck on the success you are having so far. Keep up the good work. You and everyone one else in here can do it, I know its hard, but you all have the strength, you just need to find it is all. Take care and keep your chin and spirits up. If you get down, you know you can come here and someone is bound to return with some kind of comment sooner or later. 

Again Take care and Happy Birthday. I hope it was a decent one for you!! ~~later~~

Aurora

manonfire · Answer

Ya, I been to meetings. Had 11 yrs of sobriety at one point. They can help. I can't go back. I don't want to face those people in my condition.

FLaddict · Answer

sent you an email my friend hope you got it...you get a big (((((((((((((((((((HUG))))))))))))))))) today..

creek · Answer

Have you gone to meetings...sponsors?  what is your spin on it?

manonfire · Answer

Can't bullsh*t a bulsh*tter, thats what they say. I wish you'd flush em, but I understand if u don't. I won't be mad.

creek · Answer

Who TF am I kidding?  Me too, got 'em, take 'em.  Thanks for cutting through right to the bullshit I'm dishing out tonight.

manonfire · Answer

Not insane. addicted, but not insane. :-)

Ok, I ain't sayin flush em. Just don't take anymore. Maybe tomorro u can flush em. If you are anything like me, you will be downing the whole damn bottle before I get done typing this. I don't buy the emergency dose thing. Not sayin it can't work, just not for me. If I got em I take em.

creek · Answer

Have you read the theory about just have the pills here, know you can take one, but always say I will wait another day.  Am I nuts, but I feel like I really wish I could try that.  So, yes, I can not take anymore tonight.  That is what I CAN DO.  You are right, **** or get off the pot here, I have to take some action and get back on board.  This is hard.  I am glad you are here to kick me in my ass.  I don't have a lot but it is enough to ruin my recovery, I will not flush em so don't even go there.  But maybe, just maybe, I could keep em here and just keep going one more day.   Do I sound insane???  Deny Deny Deny  is that what you are thinking about me?

manonfire · Answer

Quit sitting there stinking in your s h i t ! We have all had slips. I don't think any of that **** u said about yourself. I bet u wouldn't think the same about me if I slipped. What makes it easier will be to not kick the **** outa yourself, and don't slip anymore tonite. You can do that, right?

creek · Answer

Well in all reality we know we wouldn't be on tonight if we didn't need to connect.   Ya, I ****** up big time.  Something kinda "fell into my lap" without much effort and it just happened...no willpower, no self-respect, just complete euphoria because I could take one.  Now I feel like a peice of ****.  I feel like I am sick.  I feel like I am a waste of time and energy and I will never change.  Self-loathing, pathetic, addicted loser.  You asked :)   How are you doing?

manonfire · Answer

I won't pry, but I am here if u want to talk about it

creek · Answer

It is tracys birthday today too.  I wish you a happy and clean day.  I hope your life isn't much more exciting than mine, or you will bail on me too tonight!!!  Yes, saturday nights alone are tough.  I have a relapse issue going on tonight...guess I found my partner in a bottle.

wow. nobody here.

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