Aa
Today is going to be hard
Today is going to be a difficult one for me. About 3 trs ago I had to have my ovaries removed. I was 33. I had hugy cysts and they needed to be removed and tested for cancer. Fortunately it came back negative but now I can't have children.
At the time I didn't want kids. I was ok w/having them removed. What infuriates me now is my doc at the time.
You see I told her I didn't want kids but I was only 33. She didn't give me any other option. Well a few months ago a friend had the same problem as me. BUT she still has her ovaries they just removed the cysts. So now I wonder "did my doc do right by me".
I was too young at 33 to think I didn't want children because now I do. I want a child with all my heart.
I had my neices over night Friday (they are 9 and 10) and part of the day Saturday and I was so happy when they were here. I just felt at piece. But now I am so sad.
Being a Mom is something I know I would be so good at. I love kids and I find myself having conversations with my neices about life and I think what a great mom I would be.
I tell them so many positive things. Like how lucky they are to be sisters and be so close in age and how that bond when they are older will get them through rough time.
we were watching a silly movie once and there was a fat cheerleader. Well let me tell you she was by no means fat. So I told them not to fall prey to that. And they were like "yeah she is so not fat and those girls (in the movie) are mean. I always tell them how smart, pretty and loved they are. I think if I had a child what a great kid they would be.
The hard part is my husband doesn't want kids at all. I told him how I feel and would sit on this until November and then we would talk.
But I know my feelings will never change. But I also know I won't ever have kids and that saddens my soul like you can never believe. I think that is one reason I turned to pills.
Anyway so today is gonna be rough really rough cause it is moms day and a reminder that I will never celebrate this day.
But I hope all you mothers give your kids love today and enjoy the bliss I am sure they bring to your lives and I hope they make you stronger and keep you on the straight and narrow.
Missy
At the time I didn't want kids. I was ok w/having them removed. What infuriates me now is my doc at the time.
You see I told her I didn't want kids but I was only 33. She didn't give me any other option. Well a few months ago a friend had the same problem as me. BUT she still has her ovaries they just removed the cysts. So now I wonder "did my doc do right by me".
I was too young at 33 to think I didn't want children because now I do. I want a child with all my heart.
I had my neices over night Friday (they are 9 and 10) and part of the day Saturday and I was so happy when they were here. I just felt at piece. But now I am so sad.
Being a Mom is something I know I would be so good at. I love kids and I find myself having conversations with my neices about life and I think what a great mom I would be.
I tell them so many positive things. Like how lucky they are to be sisters and be so close in age and how that bond when they are older will get them through rough time.
we were watching a silly movie once and there was a fat cheerleader. Well let me tell you she was by no means fat. So I told them not to fall prey to that. And they were like "yeah she is so not fat and those girls (in the movie) are mean. I always tell them how smart, pretty and loved they are. I think if I had a child what a great kid they would be.
The hard part is my husband doesn't want kids at all. I told him how I feel and would sit on this until November and then we would talk.
But I know my feelings will never change. But I also know I won't ever have kids and that saddens my soul like you can never believe. I think that is one reason I turned to pills.
Anyway so today is gonna be rough really rough cause it is moms day and a reminder that I will never celebrate this day.
But I hope all you mothers give your kids love today and enjoy the bliss I am sure they bring to your lives and I hope they make you stronger and keep you on the straight and narrow.
Missy
Hi there, I'm just new to the forum, have posted a couple of times but your post breaks my heart cos I know how you feel. I am 34 have had 2 spinal fusions and am on alot of drugs I dont wanna be on. My sister just had a little girl last month, my first niece, I've 2 nephews, she's 37 and livin in the states so I wont get to see my niece.(I'm in N. Ireland)
I've wanted kids as long as I can remember and I honestly thought by now my dream would have come true. My partner already has a son so that kinda hurts too cos his little circle of life is complete so it doesnt really matter to him I guess. But I really feel your pain. Maybe your Dr had no choice but to remove your ovaries, however thats a question obviously I'm not able to answer. Your hurt probably completely outweighs mine as I have to believe that "someday" I will be off all this rubbish and be able to be a mum, however, god knows what damage to my body they have all done and if I will ever be able to get pregnant. I lost a child in 1999 and thats a tough one to think about. I just have to tell myself it was the wrong time and not meant to be, but that doesnt always help.
I just want you to know you are not on your own today. My heart is with you and I completely understand how you are feeling right now.
Sending you the warmest hug I can.
Stay strong
With Love
Tin Lizzie
I've wanted kids as long as I can remember and I honestly thought by now my dream would have come true. My partner already has a son so that kinda hurts too cos his little circle of life is complete so it doesnt really matter to him I guess. But I really feel your pain. Maybe your Dr had no choice but to remove your ovaries, however thats a question obviously I'm not able to answer. Your hurt probably completely outweighs mine as I have to believe that "someday" I will be off all this rubbish and be able to be a mum, however, god knows what damage to my body they have all done and if I will ever be able to get pregnant. I lost a child in 1999 and thats a tough one to think about. I just have to tell myself it was the wrong time and not meant to be, but that doesnt always help.
I just want you to know you are not on your own today. My heart is with you and I completely understand how you are feeling right now.
Sending you the warmest hug I can.
Stay strong
With Love
Tin Lizzie
I think that today should be called "mothering day" because whether or not we biologically give birth, there is that innate "womanness" in most of us that makes us "mother". Sounds like you are doing a great job at mothering those nieces. I mother adults, dogs, students (as a teacher), etc. baby birds that have fallen out of their nests, and so on and so on.
We all have a mother so let's celebrate her as well as all women who have mothered us in some way. Let us not forget the gift we have to share as strong, nurturing women.
Have a great one!
We all have a mother so let's celebrate her as well as all women who have mothered us in some way. Let us not forget the gift we have to share as strong, nurturing women.
Have a great one!
Hi. I can't say that i know how you feel, but i can see the sadness in you.
You are so right when you say it should be mothering day. All of us women are naturally motherly and nurturing no matter if they are biological or not.
I'm sure your nieces feel that from you.
We mothers need to be reminded some times how fortinant(spelled wrong) we are. So thank you for that reminder!
God bless< and you can do this.
KVMJ
You are so right when you say it should be mothering day. All of us women are naturally motherly and nurturing no matter if they are biological or not.
I'm sure your nieces feel that from you.
We mothers need to be reminded some times how fortinant(spelled wrong) we are. So thank you for that reminder!
God bless< and you can do this.
KVMJ
I cannot tell you how warm my heart is right now by all your kind thoughts. I suppose it is true we all are Mothers in our own way.
I loved the part about Mothering sick birds. About 3 wks ago an egg fell out of a nest. I took the egg and put it in a basket under a warm light. I wanted it to hatch so bad. And I looked online to find out what to do if it hatched. I was ready to gring bugs up (I don't usually kill anything, even a bug) and feed every hour. The egg never hatched. And my husband just smiled at me. He knew but he also knew what I was doing (what a good man he is let me tell you. Sticking by me through all of this even though he doesn't get it he is always here for me).
But it is true as a women we nurture so even if I don't have kids (I have a kitty) I can still claim this day.
Thanks for all your kind words. Helps to know you are all out there and we are not alone.
I loved the part about Mothering sick birds. About 3 wks ago an egg fell out of a nest. I took the egg and put it in a basket under a warm light. I wanted it to hatch so bad. And I looked online to find out what to do if it hatched. I was ready to gring bugs up (I don't usually kill anything, even a bug) and feed every hour. The egg never hatched. And my husband just smiled at me. He knew but he also knew what I was doing (what a good man he is let me tell you. Sticking by me through all of this even though he doesn't get it he is always here for me).
But it is true as a women we nurture so even if I don't have kids (I have a kitty) I can still claim this day.
Thanks for all your kind words. Helps to know you are all out there and we are not alone.
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