Chrosty, I hear ya on everything.  FLaddict is right though -- go back and read your posts.  Think about it.  (I know that's tough love, but you know the love is there at least, I hope.)  Again, I'm more of a newbie (few weeks or maybe a month), and I don't know your whole story, but I know you've been trying, and I know you sound like an awesome individual with an absolutely AWESOME heart.  Yes, do it for your kids.....but also do it for yourself.  Let's get these f------ things out of our lives.   I just took 2 hydro 10's together for the first time ever.....only about 5 hours since I took my last one.  I'm trying to get rid of this icky headache/migraine.....and instead, I'm giving one right back to myself.  These things are horrid.  HORRID.  I can't believe I've been on them so long.....and I can't believe I've been in denial for so long either.  Didn't someone in this thread mention something about the icky hydro hangover the next morning.  OMG, that's me!!!!!!  I always feel like sh-- in the morning and never put two and two together.  Until now.  Geez.  Anyway, I KNOW how terrifying it is to be without.  Just knowing I have some stashed in my purse is more comforting than anything else in the world, so I KNOW what you're saying and feeling.  I can hear and feel your pain.  I really can.  I'm there, too.  I crave these things.....but I want them OUT OF MY LIFE.  But, for right now, how can we help YOU to do that?  Keep posting and let us know what's going on, ok??  Please let us know.....  

Oh my God Girl!  I just posted almost the exact same post.  Sort of.  Anyway, I too dream of pills all of the time.  I can get 30 and already I start panicking about what to do when I run out.  No one knows about my addiction, but my husband made the comment the other day, "You spent 1700.00 in a week.  You're spending money like a drug addict."  lol  If he only knew how true that was.  Anyway, FLaddict talked to me about a tapering plan.  Maybe we should do it together.  I love ya and I'm thinkin of you.  God, I feel your pain...I really, really, do.  We have to let this monster go!

xoxo

we all "one more timed it" till we couldn't anymore... when is the time that is really going to destoy your health for good???  GOT CHILDREN?

ok girly time for some tough love.. I wish you could go back and read all your posts. Every week or every other week you post you post that you are out of pills and its the end of the world. And that there is no way you can get more. Yet you do.. If you would have stopped weeks ago you already would be feeling better and on your way to a happy healthy recovery process. How long are you gonna do this to yourself??  YOU CAN DO THIS... Take that will you have to quit and use it to conquer your fear. You deserve it, your hubby deserves it and so do your babies. If you put all the effort you put into getting more pills when you are out into getting free of them you would rule the world.
I love ya girl but I can't watch ya keep doing this to your self like this.

listen to fladdict,your never gonna stop till you stop

Hey, I know the new script looks half full doesn't even before you get it...Chrosty you know you have to start doing research on Suboxone!!!!  I feel for ya cause I tried and tryed and treid I just couldn't stop.  Please don't do it alone... trust me!  You will run out of the FIVE HUNDREDS IN ONE DAY!

What city and state are you in??

Hey you...I know you and me never really talked that much, but I have to respond to this. I agree so much with fladdict and tomanypills. Because I have been where you are...and I KNOW what you are going through. I was SO hooked, I was up to 30 norcos a day towards the end....THIRTY NORCOS A DAY.....I could have went into liver failure, I could have seized, I could have DIED. And, like you, when my bottle was getting low, I panicked....and always managed to get some from someone...UNTIL..the day finally came when I COULDN'T GET ANYTHING. Nothing. That's when I decided enough. Enough worrying, spending money we didn't have....E N O U G H. Like you, tapering was not an option for me.  I'd gobble those things up like a box of mint meltaways. (my favorite candy lol).
Chrosty, YOU HAVE TO THROW OUT THAT SCRIPT. I know you are thinking "she's crazy, no way am I gonna toss this script" but you have to, if you want to really quit. Fish is right, you'll go through those 5mgs in one day. If you are really wanting to quit, quit NOW....while you have no pills at all.
Lemme tell ya what its like once you quit:
NO MORE WORRYING ABOUT WHEN AND WHERE YOU ARE GONNA GET PILLS.
NO MORE WONDERING WHAT STORY YOU ARE GONNA TELL AN ER DOC TO GET PILLS
NO MORE SPENDING MONEY YOU KNOW YOU DON'T HAVE
NO MORE 'VICODIN HANGOVER' YOU KNOW YOU GET WHEN YOU WAKE UP IN THE MORNING
NO MORE WORRYING ABOUT YOUR HEALTH.
NO MORE, PERIOD.
Yes, its gonna be hell for the next 3-5 days. But believe me honey, it gets better.....by the end of the 5th day you feel like a new person, at least I did.
Think of the FREEDOM you will have soon....break those chains of addiction and be FREE.
You know what's a good idea for you? When you are through the w/d's then get a jar...like a big mayonaise jar and put the money you WOULD have spent on pills in it for a few months....THEN, count it all up...and I bet you have enough to take the family to a theme park, or the zoo, or something FUN for all of you to do!

THROW OUT THAT SCRIPT, CHROSTY.....Trust me.....throw it out.
Start your new life NOW. Post, Post, POST all weekend....I have to work tomorrow night but I'll be here tomorrow day if you need to talk.
You can DO this.....you're stronger than you know.

BIG HUGS,
Jenny

You ARE a GOOD mom, wife, daughter.....You are. You just are caught in the claws of a mighty addiction demon...but you are stronger than that demon, you just don't even know. Don't sell yourself short, ever-----you ARE good. Its that addiction thats the bad thing in your life right now. NOT YOU.
You can do it, chros..I KNOW you can.
THROW out that script, and be free starting NOW. :) :) :)

Jenny

I know for me, that's the kicker......I look at my kids and I think OMG, what if I take one too many, what if my body says no more........how freaking selfish am I to do this first of all to myself, but then to my kids, who I brought in to this world, I am Mommy....and that makes me want to do this no more....I don't know your story, but I know every state has some kind of aid for those with no insurance...so there is help, and Lord knows I am not trying to come down on you, and I am no different or no better than you or anyone else on this forum....but I feel your pain and I'm sorry.

Oh honey, I forget can yu get help from a dr to taper?

I am so sorry you are struggling. I am new and probably don't have the best advice. I read your posts. You are an awesome person....just know that I care....