You know this site is soo great, but I wish so bad that we were all in one big house together to be there to rip the phone out of someones hands when they are about to pick it up to make that call to try to get some more pills, and i wish that we could be together just to give a hug to someone when they are feeling low. The way i am feeling today, just freakin sucks... God, i want so bad to get some, i know i am not gonna do it, just feeling this way for some reason today. My nerves are shot, i feel worthless, and lazy, and sad i feel it all right now. I swear to all of you, if it were not for this site i would have failed. I know me, and i am a quitter. I pray every night "Please God help me I can't do this on my own anymore." Give me strength...I have come so freakin far, to turn back now, but this damm temptation is killing me. I feel like i am gonna lose it any moment now. My kids are driving me up the wall today, my husband went back to work, and i feel lost and lonely. He was my support, now he is gone. I can't take this emptiness i am feeling inside. I know this is prob.normal but i am weak and don't know how to deal with this. Part of me wants to run away and go cry somewhere,God if i didn't have kids i would.
I know it gets better, i read what you all say, but errrrrrr i really don't know if i am gonna be able to make it. I keep telling myself 10 days now over and over in my head, and it feels like eternity to me and i am proud to say it has been 10 days, but at the same time i just want to quit and give in. I miss my husband being here, but he had to go back to work. This just sucks today... See here i am being a crybaby again, when ya all have your own problems to deal with, sure ya don't need someone like me whining around. Just feels good sometimes to write what i am feeling is all... Sorry

Hopeless