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216878 tn?1196037520

Shelby and everyone, Plzzz help me, I need advice...

You are so right, we are normal people. Others may look down on us, but they just don't understand is all. You know something, everyone is an addict in one way or another...Some have to have that first cup of coffee in the morning, and if they don't have it they say they can't get going, Right? Well that is an Addict also. But does that make them bad? NO it does not... It is us, the ones that are here and are able to admit our problems and ask for help, that are doing a good thing.

I feel the biggest thing for me right now is my depression, OMG it is terrible, just got off the phone from my husband, and told him, "Think i will call my doctor and finally admit to him that i have been addicted to percocets and tell him that i have been clean for 10 days now and let him know i have went through all the major withdrawals but let him know about this severe depression i am having, Then maybe he can give me something to help with that...

This is what i want to do, but also scared to do it...cause i know if i do then my days of getting pills are done forever...But sure would feel good just to be honest with myself and my doctor, and at the same time maybe he can give me something to take for this awful depression... Should I do this?

I know he would understand, and be proud that i can admit this to him, just scared, cause i know i will be done forever with pills if i do this....But i really need something for my depression, It is killing me here...


Any Advice?????

Hopeless
11 Responses
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177036 tn?1192286635
Do you have colonidine?  The dox don't have any problem prescribing that.
Helpful - 0
216878 tn?1196037520
No i don't... What is that?
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
hopeless... first of all, my friend in AA told me "a day at a time."  so, if it makes it easier, don't put that "never gonna be able to take a pill" trip on yourself - it only makes it harder... likely, you will never take one again anyway, but that worry is for tomorrow.  again, that's why they say "a day at a time." often times, they say just get thru the next 15 minutes...

as for the anti-depressants, can you go to a psychiatrist instead?  i only say that because they tend to know the anti-depressants better (in general) then a regular MD.  if not, i am sure the MD will be able to help you too... (my GP helped my ex-husband with them at one point. and it helped.)

maybe it's also worth telling the MD about the addiction - i don't know.  maybe it's a safeguard against yourself. maybe not a bad idea? but if too overwhelming - screw it. you can always do that later if you feel you need to.

regardless, i would get help for the depression. all my friend kept telling me the last few months i was depressed.. i guess i was the last to know.  i started the anti-d's this week and sister, i am SO glad i did...

my love to you...
mj
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I know exactly what you mean.  I wondered if I had been on prozac or something to increase my seritonin level if my recovery would have been quicker (always looking for somethiing quickerlol)  Frm what I have read when on opiates your body kinda takes a break from producing seritonin and it takes a while for it to kick in.  It took me a month or 35 days to be exact.  Ask your doctor - it can't hurt.
Helpful - 0
216878 tn?1196037520
I guess i could call a someone besides my MD...
Do you mind if i ask what are you taking for the depression? And did it start working right away? I know some take like 2 weeks or so to start working... and i need something that will start now.

Thanks
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
One of the things they tell you to do when you are serious about getting clean is to inform your Doctor and the pharmacies you use that you are an addict.  It helps to keep you on the straight and narrow.  It is your decision but sweetie the depression does pass!  I know it is hard but try not to worry so much.  You don't have to make any decisions today.  You need to just relax as much as you can.  Try and do something you enjoy.  Take your time.  Listening to music helped me a lot and of course watching a boat load of movies.  Anything that will take your thoughts in another direction.  Do you have a animal?  My cat had been my constant little guardian.  Helps to bring my stress level way down.  Maybe go through some old photo albums - I did that and it brought back some wonderful memories.  Things I did not think about while being intoxicated.  I will try to think of more things.

Love,

Shelby
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
so far i dont feel depression just stress and tension. i think thats just me and the way im dealing with things though. remember the other day how happy you were outside with your hubby and doing all those things? maybe watch some comedy movies...take more hot  baths to relax ya. take a walk..
make a lil love ..get down tonight..kiddin hehe that slipped.
you know this will pass like all the other wd's. give it some time ok
Helpful - 0
216878 tn?1196037520
Yes I animals... lol, way 2 many... 3 dogs, 3 cats, and the one cat just had kittens... I do try to focus alot on them, been taking them for walks in the evening and i do feel a little better after i come back. Sometimes i just sit on my front porch and watch them, and just imagine what life would be like to be them, just for a day...I have been watching some movies as well, but find myself daydreaming in the middle of the movie, thinkin about pills again.
My mind just keeps wondering, i find it hard to focus on something. (makin me nuts)
But I am not gonna make any rash decisions today, maybe this is just a bad day, and tomorrow might look a lil different.

I know most of this is cause my husband left me for the first time today since i started. He had to get back to work. Just really missin him here, and having a shoulder to cry on. He was my encouragement, he just knew how to get me through the day. He really kept me motivated... now him not here, i am feeling alone and lost and don't know what to do with myself, I feel scared. I just talked to him again, and he tells me, "you can do this" he tells me I don't need him, he wants me to learn not to depend on him so much, cause he wants me to be my own person and learn how to be strong again.

Just scary is all, alone for the first time since i started this whole thing. Not knowing who i am and what to do with my days now. I am frightened and afraid and just feel alot lost....I know when he gets home i will be fine, but he won't be home until tomorrow afternoon, He had to go out of state... This really sucks.. But thank God i have all of you to help me through this rough day and what i am sure is going to be a very long and rough night..

Thanks again, Hopeless
Helpful - 0
216878 tn?1196037520
LOL
Ya just know what to say to put a smile on my face again.
Yes i do remember the other day after going for a walk OMG  i did feel good that day.
I know everyday is not going to be the same. It is normal to have bad days.
Just want to take something to help my depression, but don't know if i should call Dr. or not.

HEHEHE.... speakin of  makin lil love, and gettin down tonight, my poor hubby, he wants it so darn bad, but i don't...Thank God he is patient...lol ( :

Had to share that with ya..

again thanks for your encouragment

Hopeless
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
You husband is right - you can do this.  You will find your strength again.  We all will.  It comes back slowly - but it comes!  I had a tough day last Friday but I got through it - several people here sort of talked me through it.  One thing they mentioned is if you are not eating - and your blood sugar is low - it will make you crave the pills more.  I ate a bunch of strawberry ice cream - I wasn't very hungy but ice cream goes down very well.  Also, maybe a smoothie - if you like those?  

Oh and by the way I have 4 cats and 2 dogs - actually my husband is a fanatic for animals like I am and we are going to pick up a dog we applied for at the animal shelter tomorrow after work.  So the count will be 4 cats and 3 dogs!  The dogs are all labs too.  Hyper as heck.  I love them to death though.  And you might have read about my one cat in particular.  He is with me all the time!  He is a nut.  Actually I think he is literally nuts.  You know he sleeps on his back, his legs are everywhere!  None of my other cats will do this.  He is so silly.

Shelby
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I totally understand what you're going through!! The depression is horrible during withdrawals! And you are at day 10, so prob in the worst of the depression right now. It WILL clear up, I promise!! It prob doesn't seem like it right now, but you will start to feel better soon.
My advice to you would be to tell your doctor that you are addicted ( and went cold turkey). It will prevent you from being able to call up in the future to get more pills if you have a bad day, ya know? You are on day 10, and through the worst part, which is AWSOME!! You don't ever want to go through that again, and one day you just might forget how awful it was, and call to get more pills...if you tell your doc, not only will he be able to help you right now with the depression, but he won't prescribe you pills in the future...basically, you'd be protecting YOURSELF from a relapse!!
That is only my opinion, but I am here for you either way!! The depression can feel like your life is ending, I know, but it's not and it WILL get better, and most likely very soon!!! I'm here for you!!!
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