I am a 46 yr old white female.  I suffered panic attacks most of my life, but didn't realize what they were until they got really bad in 1992.  At that time I became enclosed inside my house in my own personal hell.  I was prescribed a number of drugs to help with the panic, but none worked...I still ended back up in the ER.  FINALLY...my doctor put me on Klonopin. He prescribed 1 mg every morning.  I started feeling "normal" once again and was able to live my life like most people without fear.  

In 2000 I went into the hospital and went off the klonopin with the help of experts in the mental health unit.  The withdraw was horrible.  I was going through a divorce at the time and was devastated, so my mind was mostly on loosing my marriage.  Even though I was focusing on the failed marriage, I still suffered the withdraw with great pain, mentally and physically.  It took about 1 week in the hospital and about a good month and a half at home before I was completely rid of the klonopin.  

After being off of the klonopin until sometime in 2003, I started suffering panic again.  I couldn't think and was afraid of life itself.  So I started taking the klonopin again at the 1mg dose and WOW....I started living normal again.  The anxiety went away again.  So now my dr has decided I suffer from a life-long anxiety disorder and will be on them for the rest of my life which I have learned to accept.  I never increase the dose or take any other kinds of recreational meds or drugs. In fact, I am afraid of the effects of meds and try to avoid anything except the klonopin.  I don't drink either.

My question you ask?  My husband.  He thinks I am addicted to the klonopin and makes fun of me for it and puts me down.  He even gets verbally abusing sometimes to the point that I feel I need to leave my marriage and move away.  Unfortunately, he is on Loritabs...3 of the 7.5 a day for pain.  He has been on these way before our marriage 3 years ago. His thinking is fuzzy and he cannot remember things and I get the blame for that.  Sometimes it almost seems like he is "not all there".  He denies being addicted and goes into a RAGE when I offer to help him to get help from a professional.  What do I do?  Are the Loritabs making him slow?  Is my klonopin the wrong thing for me to take?  Right now I feel like I can't take much more of this with his personality being so abusing.....I'm afraid I will have panic attacks even though I am on the klonopin.  Please help me somebody!  We have a mental heath appt today for our marriage.  He told me he was going to tell the therapist that I am the abusing one, not him.  He is scaring me.  Please give me feedback on my klonopin usage and his loritab addiction...if you can call it an additiction.....Misskimberly