Hey sweetie, I'm so sorry you are still havin' that speech problem.  I'm hoping with time that will get better.  Maybe ask your doctor about that, also.  I do know that I've always had a speech problem since I was a kid.  I always forget what I was gonna say or if I'm in a big group of people and I'm standing and talking to them all, I stutter and forget.  I hated book reports that I had to stand in front of the whole class.  I used to get ill to my stomach.  But I totally improved when I was on the pills.  I talked very smoothly... as a waitress, I hated big parties because all their eyes were on me while i was taking their order.  When I was taking pills while waitressing, I was at ease and had no problem talking to them at all and I got all there orders right when I was taking pills.  I don't know why but that is really odd isn't it?  I hope you get better over time.  And good luck with the surgery.  Keep us posted, k?

Luvs ya and take care,

Lil.  :)

Hey girl, it looks like you got a lot of feedback and some interesting comments.  Did you do a search on the internet?  If you find out anything else, let me know.  I, too, want to know if my brain will ever return to "normal".
Love,
Yodes

What happens to us is the opiate fools our brain into not making any endorphins since the opiates are loaded with them.  So once you go cold turkey you have ZERO endorphins.  That is why we get the creepy crawly feeling.  Our neurons are firing trying to pick up endorphins and finding none.  It take awhile for our depleated brain to begin making endorphins.

Hi there. I don't have any real answers for you except to say that I think our brains need lots of time to re-adjust and it happenes in different stages.
I also wanted to say HI and say that i'm sending {{{{{HUGS}}}}}} and {{{{{{{LOVE}}}}} your way! LOL

I know what you mean, it is scary to think about the pills doing that type of damage.  I don't know the answer but I can share my own experience since I've been down this road before.   And you didn't sound arrogant in the least.

After injecting crystal meth (ever looked at the ingredients??) for two years straight, I went on to earn a B.A., a Masters, two teaching credentials and am 2 classes away from a second Masters.   Before shooting crystal meth, I had shot heroin for a few years.   I had basically been high from age 12 - 24 with the exception of when I was pregnant with my daughter and until she was 4 yrs old at which time I wouldn't even take an aspirin.
Now this is full on street drugs I'm talking here.

Speed ahead to present, and after being clean for almost 2 decades I get hooked on script drugs.    
I am about 30 days clean and find that I get that loss for words type of thing too.

I think that it is temporary and that we will once again be as articulate as before.  I don't know how young you are but for me I keep the age factor in mind as well.  
Menopause has similar symptoms, aphasic speech issues (we know what we want to say but its slower retrieving the words from our brain and getting them out).  

I guess time will tell.  
tzt

Hi dear, I don't really know if I have anything to contribute to your questions.  I have only been clean from the oxys for about 130 days, and I still do not think or talk or write as well as I used to.  I hope my brain returns to "normal", but I guess only time will tell.  I think you could do a search on the internet and probably find a lot of good information.  Even our doctors and therapists use the net as a tool for information.  I hope you are feeling better and having a great day!  It is a beautiful day here in N. Central Florida, but hot!
Love,
Yoda

I hate so say it, but this was something I noticed right away when I started taking hydrocodone. My thinking was much clearer and sharper. I've had a bad memory since I was a teenager, but seemed to always be on top of things when I took my meds. Like you, I didn't care for the high feeling and would dose just enough to cut the edge of pain.Too much and I would have to go lay down.
Someone told me that made me a funtional addict. It really never caused any problems for me.
I know the drug centers on our endorphines - so maybe if we try to kick up the natural endorphines somehow, stimulate?? the clearer thinking will result.

End line is the drug was probally making my memory even worse cause my boyfriend is always commenting on it. (I wasn't 24-7 on the meds)

I agree with the others, in time our brains will probally heal, if we quit beating them up. A good healing herb is passionflower, but too much can act as a sedative.

You know what things like that come up in recovery our chemistry gets a little bit on tilt, but it will come back if we take care of ourselves..Right now I feel much like you just described, but I know from doing this before that some things take longer to come back in to focus. Right now I am fighting depression but that has never been a part of my life? seems to be now though.But I know it will pass..I am sorry to hear that you have to have another operation it does make it hard.But I really believe you will come back, but you have to remember that sometimes healing takes time. And that is a hard one for most people when they get off drugs. You know you are doing the right thing but can not understand why things are not the way they once were. Memory, ability to communicate, feeling just happy to be alive, lots of emotions even sleep so many things are thrown off balance...But they do come back healing takes time..So heres to your health hang in their..a-wakan

Thank you all for your comment's, I hope it is a time thing. I'm not the most patient person when it comes this type of stuff. it is very frightening I can tell you that. I need to have the ability function a high level, to articulate and process my thought's clearly. That's all I have left is my brain, if I lose that, I'll truly be lost.

I was a lot like you (3.94 GPA in a Master's program at UGA), and now that I'm off all this, I can tell that it was all an illusion. Here's an experiment...have someone videotape you while you're on the pills. I did. And, I was flabbergasted to say the least. I looked like a bumbling idiot. I still trip up over words almost 2 weeks after quitting, but I've looked at some of my videotaped presentations, and they're amazingly improved. Why do I say all of this? Because, the drugs do just what everyone on here says they do..they alter perception.  

Let's see if this actually will post. I've typed this 3x's and when I've gone to post got booted off. If this doesn't go, this will be my last attempt.
While I was write my last post I laid back for just a sec. and ended up falling asleep. When I woke up I just continued to write, I didn't even think to pop over and see if anyone else had posted. Plus, I completely left out an entire part of what I wanted to write. Sorry guys.

Fish: How's the Sub detox going? Have you been tapering? I hope all is going really well in your fight. You keep hanging strong.

justlikeme: 60days that's FANTASTIC.....Keep doing whatever it is that got you here. Great Job

awaken: keep holding on for the ride, you're going to do great. Keep posting and we'll all be here to support you.

mom2: How are you doing today?? Are you staying strong?? I' sending those ((((Hug's)))) & ((((Kisses)))) right back at ya MUUUAAAHHH...ttyl


tzlady: Hope you're having a fantastic day as well. I hope that things are getting easier for you and that this road to recovery doesn't have too many hill's and valleys. You're such a great soul.

Yodes: What's up girlfriend? You having a good day? You sound like you are. It's a beautiful day here in sunny South Florida too, but super hot....ttyl


broknbck: I hope all is gong well with you. You can reach out to me anytime. I'm not sure if I've read any of you post's but am planning on checking that out. Stay srtrong.


RSCLADY: I hope you're doing better today, I was glad to see you back. Anyone can do this, keep fighting one day at a time.

TO ALL OF YOU: THANK YOU ALL SO VERY MUCH FOR TAKING THE TIME TO POST YOUR SUPPORT AND CONCERN OF ME. I TRULY APPRECIATE EACH ONE OF YOU, AS I DO ALL THE PEOPLE THAT ARE HERE TO SUPPORT ONE ANOTHER.
YOU ARE ALL A GIFT, THANK YOU AGAIN.

Sorry GA, I truly appreciate you're support and you on this matter. I completely understand what you are saying, but in this case it's not a perception, it's a fact. If you knew more about me or my story you may understand this whole thing better. Thank you your word's don't go unappreciated.
Peace,
Gypsy

i believe pills 'can'  damage our brains, but our brains will recover fully.

it just takes time.

its the time between quitting and full recovery thats a weird kinda limbo where our natural chemistry is 'off' and the chemistry of the pils is gone.

ive never been 'smart' and i feel weird/less sharp now 60 days off the pills

but i believe as long as i stay off the pills everything will improve.

might even grow some 'smarts' ;)

Geeze Where is DutchessGolden when you need her?  I do know that rebuilding the receptors take time and things like "new" pathways get generated with time.

Gypsygirl, someone told me once that the past is the best one you will ever have and if you think about it, it's the truth.  Emotionally we can do very strange things to ourselves... think about stress?  It can manifest itself physically.  My suggestion would be to you is put a smile on.... Be thankful for what you have left, and be helpful to others and I'll bet in just a little while, all of this worry will go away.  Keep in mind that you were put on a much lower dose and your brain came all the way back... give things time when you get off again and don't stess yourself into "something."  Maybe someone else will come up with a better answer but I do know that worrying will not make it better, only worse.

Keep up that PMA
fish