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Anxiety Community
This patient support community is for discussions relating to generalized anxiety, anxiety and eating, anxiety and sleeping, mood swings, and phobias.
HATRED TOWARDS MY FATER
by Jordanmalyon, Apr 21, 2007 12:00AM
My father beat me when I was a kid. All I can think about now is that I want to ******* smash his face in. I found his phone number in the phone book and called him and told him that I wanted to fight him.... I left a message on his answering machine and told him that I wanted to fight him. I gave him my address and phone number but he never called back.... He told me when I was a kid that if I ever thought I could beat him up to call him and he would fight me. I base my life around revenge now and I hurt people close to me like my father used to do.... (not physically.... Mentally) even tho sometimes that can be worse. I have agoraphobia now, and sometimes I cannot leave my house at all.... I dont blame this on my father, but things he did to me when I was a child could have provoked the way I feel now. I am a father now, and I would never do to my kids what he did to me. I think that it would feel GREAT to beat the **** out of him at least once, But I don't think that he will come near me anymore since Im alot bigger than I used to be. anyways I just wanted to vent a bit.... sorry if anyone thinks Im just a guy pleading for attention. if anyone can give me advice I would appreciate it. I have anger issues I need to resolve, I cannot take any type of authority figure in my life. I am very angry, and I want to stop being so angry. my mind is racing with things to say.... but I dont want to talk to anyone I know about it....
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Here you go, I even put up a link so you can order it directly from Amazon. It's very readable, and quick, and practical and it will allow you to move on. Just because your childhood was horrible, you don't have to have a miserable existance now. Living well is the best revenge. ;D
Best wishes to you.
http://www.amazon.com/Bad-Childhood-Good-Life-Blossom-Childhood/dp/006057786X