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Anxiety Community
This patient support community is for discussions relating to generalized anxiety, anxiety and eating, anxiety and sleeping, mood swings, and phobias.
Help...........
by jimmyclappa, Jun 12, 2007 12:00AM
Firstly id like to point out that ive been a heavy alcohol abuser for about 4 years and i was taking drugs like exacty, anthetamines, etc for about 7 months (stopped 5 months ago). I'm a extremely paranoid person, Im depressed and not happy with anything, i had a short councilling session about 2 years ago for depression which did not help and i refused to take anti-depressents. And i have panic attacks over very stupid things, allot more since the drug taking began... When i get a cold or something i think im dying, When i feel ill i think i have food poisioning and im going to die or i have menigitis etc. I can also make myself ill from just thinking these things.
Now thats out the way heres my problem,
roughly 3 months ago i was due to start a new job on the monday, from the thursday, friday and the saturday i heavily drank (dont know if this is relevant). On the monday i was okay... Had the feeling of coming on with a cold. Tuesday morning woke up, Felt absolutley awful. Actually had to leave work because i paniced myself so much i thought i was going to die.
General flu like symtoms like a dull headache when moving head around etc. Stuffy nose, very tired eyes, aching mucsles, trouble breathing, etc... Bascially feeling hungover really (everytime id being hungover for the past 4 months or so i would get the same kind of problems kind of really tired sore eyes difficulty breathing and not hallucinating as such but for instance just feeling parts of my body would feel strange...but these problems would always dissapear fully after the next day) As usual when i panic myself i need to get to a safe place which at the time was my room in my old flat, Slept it off.. Ate some fruit what have you felt a bit better, for the rest of the week i felt the same waking up with blurry eyes etc. After the week i went out drinking on the weekend again etc. 2nd week started getting very slight stabbing pains in my right eye. Not exactly painful just a very short burst would usually last a few seconds then stop.
Automatically "i have a brain tumor im going to die". There hasnt bein one day i havent thought about that since i turned ill, I broke down to my step dad and told him i needed to move back and i thought i was dying etc, he said you need to go to the doctors but i was so scared id been calling it off...Went to the doctor explaining symptoms and he said your probably still recovering from a viral infection you had etc. Checked my blood pressue (presume a bit high because he said thats fine your just anxious) and checked my eyes, he said im confident there is nothing behind the eye and its perfectly normal, Went to opticians and they checked my eyes said everything was fine.
Symptoms are still there... Im getting more stressed, and now i have the internet i search almost all day long for various things i could have and keep thinking i have a brain tumor.
These are a full list of my symptoms,
Head pains on right side at back no particular time (shooting, sometimes a kind of bruising pain but if i kind of scratch or rub the area it goes away, on the odd occasion a flu like headache)
Shooting pain same as head sometimes in left eye but mainly right.
Weak legs or arms or both/muscle ache, come normally sometimes but dont seem to be as bad if im outdoors or driving my car
Feeling blurry sometimes, just not "normal"
Seeing floaters sometimes especially in bright light outdoors
Nightmares about dying of cancer (presumubly because i constantly think about it?)
Sometimes ringing in the ears. No hearing loss, Visual loss or anything. Kind of needing to pop my right ear sometimes asif you were on a plane.
Ive started waking up confused and dazed
Churning stomache in the morning sometimes
Generally not with it, Short term memory loss...
Fear of going out because i might die
Etc.
This is completley screwing my life up, When i got ill i refused to leave my room, i didnt interact with friends, i became extremely anti-social and scared to go places incase the symtoms started up, apart from weekends because when i got drunk i would feel okay. Its pretty much everyday. Ive stopped drinking alcohol on weekends, Im eating healthier. Ive got it into my head if i eat certain things like sugar, or drink coffee etc i will feel worse i tell myself in my head i will and then i get worse. I am sick of this i just want to feel normal or die this is effecting my entire life and i cant get myself better i dont know what to do with myself. Ive actually came to the point where i dont care anymore and i dont feel asif i have anything to live for because of this stupid ****. I also have blood tests on the 27th.
I have it drilled into my head that im dying and there is no point in trying to look positive anymore. I could continue but i dont wish to bore people.
Now thats out the way heres my problem,
roughly 3 months ago i was due to start a new job on the monday, from the thursday, friday and the saturday i heavily drank (dont know if this is relevant). On the monday i was okay... Had the feeling of coming on with a cold. Tuesday morning woke up, Felt absolutley awful. Actually had to leave work because i paniced myself so much i thought i was going to die.
General flu like symtoms like a dull headache when moving head around etc. Stuffy nose, very tired eyes, aching mucsles, trouble breathing, etc... Bascially feeling hungover really (everytime id being hungover for the past 4 months or so i would get the same kind of problems kind of really tired sore eyes difficulty breathing and not hallucinating as such but for instance just feeling parts of my body would feel strange...but these problems would always dissapear fully after the next day) As usual when i panic myself i need to get to a safe place which at the time was my room in my old flat, Slept it off.. Ate some fruit what have you felt a bit better, for the rest of the week i felt the same waking up with blurry eyes etc. After the week i went out drinking on the weekend again etc. 2nd week started getting very slight stabbing pains in my right eye. Not exactly painful just a very short burst would usually last a few seconds then stop.
Automatically "i have a brain tumor im going to die". There hasnt bein one day i havent thought about that since i turned ill, I broke down to my step dad and told him i needed to move back and i thought i was dying etc, he said you need to go to the doctors but i was so scared id been calling it off...Went to the doctor explaining symptoms and he said your probably still recovering from a viral infection you had etc. Checked my blood pressue (presume a bit high because he said thats fine your just anxious) and checked my eyes, he said im confident there is nothing behind the eye and its perfectly normal, Went to opticians and they checked my eyes said everything was fine.
Symptoms are still there... Im getting more stressed, and now i have the internet i search almost all day long for various things i could have and keep thinking i have a brain tumor.
These are a full list of my symptoms,
Head pains on right side at back no particular time (shooting, sometimes a kind of bruising pain but if i kind of scratch or rub the area it goes away, on the odd occasion a flu like headache)
Shooting pain same as head sometimes in left eye but mainly right.
Weak legs or arms or both/muscle ache, come normally sometimes but dont seem to be as bad if im outdoors or driving my car
Feeling blurry sometimes, just not "normal"
Seeing floaters sometimes especially in bright light outdoors
Nightmares about dying of cancer (presumubly because i constantly think about it?)
Sometimes ringing in the ears. No hearing loss, Visual loss or anything. Kind of needing to pop my right ear sometimes asif you were on a plane.
Ive started waking up confused and dazed
Churning stomache in the morning sometimes
Generally not with it, Short term memory loss...
Fear of going out because i might die
Etc.
This is completley screwing my life up, When i got ill i refused to leave my room, i didnt interact with friends, i became extremely anti-social and scared to go places incase the symtoms started up, apart from weekends because when i got drunk i would feel okay. Its pretty much everyday. Ive stopped drinking alcohol on weekends, Im eating healthier. Ive got it into my head if i eat certain things like sugar, or drink coffee etc i will feel worse i tell myself in my head i will and then i get worse. I am sick of this i just want to feel normal or die this is effecting my entire life and i cant get myself better i dont know what to do with myself. Ive actually came to the point where i dont care anymore and i dont feel asif i have anything to live for because of this stupid ****. I also have blood tests on the 27th.
I have it drilled into my head that im dying and there is no point in trying to look positive anymore. I could continue but i dont wish to bore people.
Post Comment
Quit the booze (just makes things worse the next day and so on), go out for a walk (need to get a little exercise and air) and call the doctor!!
Best to you and please post with any questions. There are many knowledgeable people on this site and are going through or have gone through what you are experiencing.
next you need to go to a good dr, he can give you meds to help you get through this. if not for my meds not sure where i would be.
you need to start living and stop worrying;;;;;;;;;; yeah right easer said than done, but with the help of a goopd dr it can take place.
yes i have had some of your symptons, they are no fun going threw a spell now been there 3 weeks but pulling my self out if not it could be a life time thing and i have to much to live for besides worrying i have something i dont have.
try relax, get good doctor and look foward not backwards. life is always worth living . God Bless you
I never used to feel that terrible when hungover...