STRESSED OUT!!!

Question

Hi my name is Kristy, I have 3 children and Im having a problem..Im a single parent and i just moved on nov 2. I have a 2,3, and 5 year old.My big problem is with my 3 year old. Since he was big enough to walk, he has been a hand full. He has been kicked out of a day care for spitting at the teacher choking her kicking and he punched the director in the face, this was going on for a while but recently its gotten worse. I was working at the school he was going to, they would send me home early because no one could handle him or leave him in my class all day. about a week ago i started a new job, I left him and my 2 year old with the baby sitter for 3 hours, well in that time he got a hold of the house bird and he tied it up with fishing line, plucked its feathers, broke its legs, broke its beak, and stabed it. I am really stressed out with not only him but my other children. The second day of school for my 5 year old I was called to the school for a conference with the principal, the teacher, the counseler, and the resourse officer.they were having a problem with him, He was kicking the wall, screaming crying and no one could calm him down. Im  a young mother at 21 and I dont know how I can handle this. Ive tried going to the pediatrican and they dont have any answers for me. Everyone says my chilren are too young for any tests or counseling. So if you have any suggestions please contact me. Email me

mamacat3 · Answer

To: Stressed Out
I am not a medical professional but a concerned mother.  I am wondering how you got into a position to have 3 children at the age of 21?  Part of your sons behavior could be lack of stability, and your parenting.  Where is the father?  Are there any male figures for him to bond with?  I do not know how old children must be before they can be in the Big Brother program but I strongly suggest you check into it before dosing your child up with medication for ADD or ADHD.  Since you are a single mother you probably work alot and I am assuming your children are being cared for by people other than yourself.  Perhaps your child just needs YOU.  I say all of my comments with only love for you and your children.  I also am raising 3 small  children alone due to divorce and know how rough it can be, but I also have support from family and friends.  Please seek out help from your church, neighbors, family, friends or call your local Catholic Charities who will be able to help you with medical or pscyhological referrals and support groups at no - cost.  I will keep you and your family in my prayers. God Bless.

meridian · Answer

kirsty it sounds to me as if you child has attention deficit hyperactivity disorder it sounds just like my two children so if its any help your not alone, try getting a book called driven to distraction by robert hallewell on adhd

Kevin Kennedy, Ph.D. · Answer

Yes, it is probably true that counseling per se will not be of benefit for the children. However, their behavior is an indication that their environment is not particularly stable and secure, and you could benefit from some support. Now, it's not unusual for children to display some instability around a move, because their world has been turned upside down. But your children's behavior indicates that they are experiencing stress in addition to the move. Seek some help for yourself in relation to the children. The three-year-old may require a special pre-school setting. The behavior toward the bird warrants immediate attention for him.

STRESSED OUT!!!

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