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Child Behavior (Expert Forum)
5 year old treated poorly
Answered by
Kevin Kennedy, Ph.D. - Child and Adolescent Psychotherapy, Family Therapy, Crisis Intervention
Harvard Vanguard Medical Associates
This forum is for questions and support regarding child behavior issues such: Child Discipline (behavior management), Normal Child Development, Parent-Child Communications, Social Development
5 year old treated poorly
by HelpsKids, May 17, 2003 12:00AM
I have been sitting for a 5 yr. old girl for 3 weeks now. Her parents are divorced and switch custody every day. Her mom drops her off tired, puffy eyed and with no jacket (52 degrees out), with a can of punch and toast. Her dad brings her in the afternoons one hour after preschool lets out and yet she goes to my fridge and takes food when she gets here.
She has untreated allergies and her mother was hostile when I asked if she would give her what her doctor prescribed. She has what looks like exema. Her mother gives her dirty looks and is cold.
Her dad talks to her as if he were Mrs. Doubtfire using babytalk. The girl uses only one word and pointing to communicate when she's with or has been with her dad. Her dad grabs her and gives her "101 kisses" when he sees her. She always says "OW" and writhes and then he tickle tortures her till she laugh/cries. He chastised her one day when she would not let him grab her and kiss her. One day she ran upstairs and when he came after her, she screamed and shoved him in his crotch. She started to use jibberish and ran out of the house.
She has started to tell me things that are disturbing.... She said: her parents had a tug of war with her and her dad got her away from her mom; her mom washed her mouth out with soap; her dad - and she spread her legs and pointed at her crotch; they both hit her for crying.
The parents said she won't be in Kinder. because she is too immature. She seems to have learning problems, she can't say how to spell her name, she starts writing on the right e.g., euS.
What do you recommend?
She has untreated allergies and her mother was hostile when I asked if she would give her what her doctor prescribed. She has what looks like exema. Her mother gives her dirty looks and is cold.
Her dad talks to her as if he were Mrs. Doubtfire using babytalk. The girl uses only one word and pointing to communicate when she's with or has been with her dad. Her dad grabs her and gives her "101 kisses" when he sees her. She always says "OW" and writhes and then he tickle tortures her till she laugh/cries. He chastised her one day when she would not let him grab her and kiss her. One day she ran upstairs and when he came after her, she screamed and shoved him in his crotch. She started to use jibberish and ran out of the house.
She has started to tell me things that are disturbing.... She said: her parents had a tug of war with her and her dad got her away from her mom; her mom washed her mouth out with soap; her dad - and she spread her legs and pointed at her crotch; they both hit her for crying.
The parents said she won't be in Kinder. because she is too immature. She seems to have learning problems, she can't say how to spell her name, she starts writing on the right e.g., euS.
What do you recommend?
Doctor's Answer
by Kevin Kennedy, Ph.D., May 19, 2003 12:00AM
, May 19, 2003 12:00AM
There is every reason to suspect that this child is being both abused and neglected, and left in the current situation will develop serious emotional disturbance. A report should be filed with the local child protection agency. If you ignore this you are effectivly colluding with the parents in the mistreatment of this child. There is an onus on all of us who try to help children and teens to intervene when they are apparently being abused or neglected.
I hope you can find answers for you and help for her. I will pray for you and your situation. Good Luck.