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Child Behavior (Expert Forum)
sleepless night's
Answered by
Kevin Kennedy, Ph.D. - Child and Adolescent Psychotherapy, Family Therapy, Crisis Intervention
Harvard Vanguard Medical Associates
This forum is for questions and support regarding child behavior issues such: Child Discipline (behavior management), Normal Child Development, Parent-Child Communications, Social Development
sleepless night's
by doodley, Jul 13, 2004 12:00AM
my daughter is 7 month's old and has not slepted thought since she was 4month's old for some reason she wake's up every 20min's for her pacifer once i give it to her she goes back to sleep, then it fall's out and wee repeat this all night long , wee have tryed letting her cry and not getting up and giving it to her she get's into a state and wee end up having to give her a bottle to settle her because she will not take the pacifier until she get's one.so we end up giving her the pacifer everytime it fall's out of her so we won't have to give her a bottle in the middle of the night.i know she is not hungry i think she just need's the pacifier to get back to sleep even though she is not fully awake when she cry's for it unless we ignore her she is usally in bed by 8pm and she has a bottle just before she goes and she start's this around 10pm everynight all night long even when she get's a bottle in middle of the night she still continues to do this.It is not has if she sleep's all day either she get's up at around 6.30am for her bottle the goes back to bed for one half hour's then she only has cat nap's off 20 min's through the day.
please help sleep deprived doodley.
please help sleep deprived doodley.
Doctor's Answer
by Kevin Kennedy, Ph.D., Jul 14, 2004 12:00AM
, Jul 14, 2004 12:00AM
You have created a situation wherein your daughter depends om the pacifier. She does not need the pacifier, and the way to stop the pattern is by persisting in waiting it out. You are going to have to bite the bullet, and thus far you haven't been able to see it through. It is difficult, because you'll have to endure your daughter's crying, and this is painful to a parent. But you are not hurting her by doing this. In the long run you are helping her. Unwittingly, you have created the problem, and you can solve it. But you'll have to be consistent - there's no easy way to solve this.
Being through a similar situation myself, I do not think it is best to take it away but I don't think you should rush to her side every time she cries. If you do something once for them, they remember it and expect it every time. It may take up to 3 weeks to break the habit.
It's not like you purposely created the situation, sometimes we do what we have to do to keep our sanity or get a few extra minutes of sleep and it ends up nipping us in the butt. Everyone has an opinion about pacifiers but until you've been up all night with a crying infant and finally give in w/ a pacifier and that seems to be all it takes, I don't think you totally understand.
My ds is 3 and if he is grouchy and won't go to sleep I give him a glass of milk in a sippy and it calms him right down. He will be out within 10 min. Still to this day the suckling soothes him. I took away his paci on his 2nd b-day, some may think that is too long but I've seen kids use them longer...it's a security thing. Some need more than others.
It will get better...I wish for you many winks of sleep!!