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Is preschool aged hitting normal behavior?

My daughter started preschool at 20 months old.At 3 years old my daughter graduated to the preschool class and at first was doing well. Then at 3.10 years old, she started using her hands to resovle conflict. She would beg me to stay every morning. My thoughts were it was her teacher's behavior. I witnessed this teacher  bang a fist on a table when correcting my child.She yells and snatches toys from kids hands. Sheis intimidating.She put my child in a chair and left her fingernail marks in her arm.She said my daughter was hurting children and that she was nose to nose  with my child telling her to stop hitting.My daughters classmates all hit each other, I have seen it yet she states that my child "hurts other children unprovoked". I thought that was normal behavior for her age, she is now 4, and that she needed patience and direction.  The teacher had requested a mental health observation for social and emotional problems.I say that she is a product of her environment and is exhibiting learned beahvior.Her teacher believes that she has a problem and has stated that it is her belief that when kids have problems, she blames the parents because kids are born innocent. I consented to the observation and the results  were that my child has great social skills and needs help to express feelings.I am at a loss at how to proceed here. I want to go to the director.Is my childs behavior normal or is the teacher right and I am in denial?
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242606 tn?1243782648
MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL
Without the opportunity to observe the situation, I can only offer you a perspective. Your description indicates that both your daughter and her teacher can use some help in learning how better to handle anger. There is no doubt that your daughter should not hit to express her anger, regarddless of what is going on around her. Set a very fiirm limit with her about this: 'No hitting'. Now, if you have concerns about the teacher's expression of her own anger, by all means speak with the director of the school. You are correct in thinking that an atmosphere of unrest and aggression will very likely bring out those traits in children, whether at home or in school. We expect teachers to model the sorts of behavior we want our children to learn. Children learn about emotions and behavior in school, just as they learn their letters, sounds and numbers.
Helpful - 0
159063 tn?1247272817
If I understood you correctly, the Teacher left finger nail marks in your daughters arm?? If thats the case YOU need to report this teacher. She should be setting an example for the children, not being nose to nose with them and yelling in their face. YES children are a product of their enviroment, but also I feel this is a learned behavior. I presume she is in preschool all day long. If so then she is learning this is the way to resolve conflict. Children learn rather quickly and will mimic others behavior. MY daughter whom is nine, goes to visit her father once a month, (he lives 300 miles away) her behavior before going is well adjusted, polite and extremely friendly and happy, she is a product of her enviroment. happy and well structured home life., when she comes home from her fathers is something else. she is, well lets just say she acts as though she is the QUEEN and I better bow down to her and do as she says and wants because she deserves it. Needless to say after several conversations with my ex, he revealed he gives her everything she wants, and lets her do pretty much anything she wants, again a product of her enviroment, and that is after only 3 days with him once a month,. I am not an expert but I do know what this pre school teacher is doing is WRONG and should be fixed as soon as possible, look for another day care, and report this wing nut.  
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