I also forgot to mention I had tonuge ulcers for a few weeks, and I think some oral thrush? Can I get some advice?

Almost buried in your question is the only symptom that sounds important at all:  Urethral discharge.  Slight, completely clear mucus can be normal.  However, nothing but STD causes abnormal discharge, i.e. cloudy or yellowish, or substantial in amount.  See a provider right away for diagnosis and treatment.  Sending your partner for diagnosis, without getting it yourself, didn't make much sense.  You need testing for gonorrhea and chlamydia, regardless of her reported negative test results.

Please search the forum threads and archives for all the times I have discussed the low likelihood of HIV in heterosexuals in the US without obvious HIV risks (injection drug use, etc); the low risk of transmission for any single episode (or several episodes) of vaginal sex; the unreliability of symptoms as an indicator of new HIV infection; and the reliability of a negative HIV test at 4 weeks, especially in a low-risk situation.  Use such search terms as "ARS symptoms", "HIV transmission risk", "time to positive HIV test", and "HIV anxiety".  And if "everything" means your partner was tested for HIV and had a negative test, that provides additional strong reassurance.

I cannot say what is causing your symptoms apart from the discharge, except that the chance you have HIV is virtually zero.  But if they persist, follow up with your primary health care provider.

Regards--  HHH, MD