Anyone Still Awake?

Question

It's going on 2 a.m. where I am, and I can't sleep.  I have a follow-up tomorrow (today) with my Oncologist, and I am a little nervous about it.  If my CA 125 stays stable, my appointments will move to every two months instead of the weekly/monthly appointments I've had since last September.  Most of the time, I'm rarin' to face this ugly OvCa head-on.  But it's times like these when I am laying in the dark in a quiet house...not in the mood to watch re-runs of "Seinfeld" that seem to be on every channel...that the fears try to sneak their way in.  Oh well...worry accomplishes nothing.  Maybe I'll go lay down and try to dream about some tropical vacation I can't afford to take where the local island men bring you drinks with umbrellas in them, and offer to rub oil on your back.  

Gail :)

Gatsby · Answer

Hey girl, it's 6:30am here, how are you?  Did you get any sleep?  Well, I am here for you for a couple of hrs, till it's time to go to work.  If you haven't left for your appt. yet, I'll keep you company.  I know the waiting is hard, but I am praying for good news for you.  You are a true warrior of The Battalion and we love ya!  Go for the pink shoes!
~Tascha

turtledovemom · Answer

6:40 am here in CT and I totally understand the non-sleeping issue.  My nerves have been so frayed for the past few weeks that there are times when I feel like one of those poor dogs in a cage at the shelter.  I purposefully didn't logon during the wee hours of last night, only because my best efforts to think about things other than my stupid ovary frequently fail me.  I'm the only human here at home right now...husband just left for work.  
Now, what about those shoes?  I love to check out Coldwater Creek's site...very cool sales on their outlet page (no, this isn't a commercial).  
Sending positive thoughts and heartfelt prayers to you!
peace,
Anne

DebiR · Answer

Boy isn't everything scarier in the dark of night???   I am so glad that you reached out.  I wish we could set up a chat for this site.  It would be great to have an informal (though we do get pretty informal here!) area for times like you had last night.  Well, I will be thinking of you today and praying it goes well.  Of course you have moments of fear but you will beat this, believe it in your heart and soul.  I feel like the job of those of us in the 99% club is to send prayers and positive vibes and support to the 1% club - to sort of be your reinforcement when you doubt your ability to do battle with this.  So know that the whole battalion is behind you and supporting you.  Keep us posted!

gah_70 · Answer

I finally went to sleep around 3 a.m., and managed to get a few hours' sleep.  Thank you to all you ladies who posted.  I, like so many others on this site, come here to find support from others who completely understand the thoughts and feelings that go along with these bumps in the road we face.  I know I can depend on my Batallion buddies! I probably won't get the results of my CA125 until next week, so it's another weekend of waiting.  I refuse to let myself worry about it all weekend, though.  I have lots to do...like buying pink shoes...to occupy my mind!  I also see my gastroenterologist today to discuss the findings from my colonoscopy (that I had more than a month ago....he's one busy guy!).  

Thanks again to you all.  I'll let you know how everything turns out.  I hope you all have a beautiful day!!

Gail :)

vixen28 · Answer

Hi Gail! Don't know if you're still having trouble sleeping, but I'm around if you feel like a chat. I'll check back in shortly~!

gah_70 · Answer

I'm still awake.  Been surfing online.  I found some really cute shoes, though, so insomnia has its benefits!

vixen28 · Answer

What sort of shoes?

vixen28 · Answer

Just gotta drive my son into town. I'll be back in about 20 minutes. I'll see if you're still partying when I get back!

gah_70 · Answer

They are pink sandals with beads/gems across the toe.  Perhaps they match Ravenlady's dancing shoes!

I think I am going to try to go to bed, but if I can't sleep, I'll be back.  Thanks for chatting!

vixen28 · Answer

They sound soooo cute!! Hope you have a great night's sleep.

kathy o · Answer

Zappos.com has free shoe delivery and usually come the next day ! Funny thing I have a new pair of Pink Sandals with beads and gems on them!!  Great Minds Think Alike...  Hope your appt.turns out great today....  Kathy

gah_70 · Answer

Kathy, are you psychic?  Zappos.com is exactly where I found the pink shoes!  I guess great minds DO think alike!

Anne, I used to get a catalog from Coldwater Creek, but haven't thought about checking out the web site.  I'll have to do that.  I seem to remember they always had a lot of really pretty sweaters.

My appointment went well.  Won't have CA125 results until Tuesday, but everything else looked good.  He went ahead and scheduled me to come back in a month because he says he's rather not move me to every two months until I hit the 6 month mark post-chemo.  

Thanks again to all you ladies.  You made a sleepless night more bearable.

Gail :)

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