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AFTER SURGURY....SEX DRIVE

I KNOW THIS IS WAY OFF THE SUBJECT BUT, AFTER SURGURY, REMOVAL OF OVARIES...WILL I HAVE A SEX DRIVE AT ALL...LADIES, I NEED YOUR INPUT...
MY HUBBY TELLS PEOPLE THAT HE HAS A HIGH DEMAND...AND WE ARE LIKE BLUNTLY....NEWLY WEDS...AT LEAST 4 DAYS A WEEK USUALLY MORE....AND WE'VE BEEN MARRIED 13 YRS...
LAST NIGHT I FELT BAD AND TOLD HIM NO...AND HE GETS ALL SULLED...I'M WORRIED THAT AFTER SURGURY THAT I WON'T HAVE THAT FEELING OR WANT ANYMORE...PLEASE SOMEONE...TELL ME HOW YOUR EXPERIENCES ARE...
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Avatar universal
Amen, Tybear.  thank you.  This is a lonely road when you actually do have Ovarian Cancer, and are just trying to deal with the 24 hr problems associated with it, the chemo drugs, shots, and all the other medicines you need to take.  Some extreme
compassion for those of us with ovarian cancer, yes.
Carelyn
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
THANK YOU BOTH FOR YOUR INPUTS...
ITS FUNNY BECAUSE I'VE ALREADY BEEN RESEARCHING BIO-IDEN. HORMONES...
I'VE GOT INFO TO BRING TO MY DR. ABOUT THIS...
HOW DID YOU GET STARTED ON THE BIO-IDENTICAL HORMONES...
I'VE BEEN TOLD IT CAN GET COSTLY??
IS THIS TRUE...DID YOU GO TO YOUR DR. FOR THIS..OR DID YOU GO THROUGH A PHARMICIST?
Helpful - 0
106886 tn?1281291572
Hi...I know this gets complicated...but, if you do pick up those books and/or go to some of the good websites, it will help you along the way. Another book I forgot to mention is "The Sexy Years" by Suzanne Somers. Now, she writes about natural menopause and it is somewhat aimed at the over 50 crowd, but it is well written and she has done her homework.

Some people go to the webite for compounding pharmacists...just google that, too...and, then you can put in your email address and area of residence ..and, they will tell you which compounding pharmacist is closest to you. Mine is 60 miles away and I have the hormones mailed to me. And, my pharmacist and doctor stay in touch. But, the pharmacist in this case is the real guide. And, many compounding pharmacists really know their stuff. They can also tell you which docs they work with so that if you need a doctor if your regular doc is not willing to help you for whatever reason (many just are not involved with this yet) your pharmacist can offer suggestions.

Insurance may cover some of the costs...and, they should..but, that is an opinion:)  Mine covers about half the cost, and I have to submit the papers to my insurance co...but I do have to be on this stuff, so I cut corners so that I can make the hormones as a top priority. I hope that someday the insurance co's will pay for more of the costs. It depends on the company. There are some bio's that are offered at regular pharmacies, such as the Vivelle patch (bio estrogen), but, again, here is where I could type fifteen pages and still not cover it all.

Good for you to have already been doing reseach on all this. You will get your answers. Get the books...call the compounders and keep asking questions...I have a feeling you will be just fine. And, you will feel like you have a degree in bioidentical hormones!!!

Take care, Mary
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Avatar universal
TY TY TY TY!!!!!!
I KNOW A PLACE ABOUT 40 MILES FROM HOME..THAT I'M CHECKING INTO...
DID YOU SEE A DIFFERENCE RIGHT AWAY...
WHAT ABOUT IN THE LOVE MAKING AREA...
WAS YOUR HUBBY UNDERSTANDING OR ?
Helpful - 0
106886 tn?1281291572
Hi again,

The best I can do is say that I think you will be well informed if and when you need any help. Not all women have the same difficulties after a hysterectomy. But, the bottom line is that there is help available and you just have to keep plugging away if you are not feeling your "self." But, since no two experiences are the same, I am not able to comment on my individual situation,(mostly because I would be up all night:) and I have to get up at 5:30!) but, I am happy to respond to posts like this because I think that all of this help that is available is like a well-kept secret. But, as you can surely understand, I have to find a stopping point...or, I would be writting a book (and I'm saving that for when I retire...ha!)

But, seriously, thanks for understanding that I am turning this over to you now...you seem to have good instincts. Suffice it to say that my spouse and I have been together for 26 years...so, yeah, he's a good guy. The surgery was in 2000. We've been through a lot together. And, as you know, every couple works things out their own unique way. You'll be fine. Also, the compounder is the better person to ask as far as the details regarding how long it takes for the hormones to start working...sorry, not even sure if you asked that....I am getting sleepy!

Take care. Glad I could help out.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
HEY,
LOL...MY SISTER TELLS ME JUST LET HIM POUT...HE'LL GET OVER IT...
I JUST PRAY THAT HE WILL BE MORE UNDERSTANDING AFTER MY SURGURY...
HUGS TO YOU ALL!!!
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Great advice everyone, and I'm taking heed too, since I may need a hysterectomy, both ovaries seem to be having problems.

I know during my third pregnancy, I thought sex was disgusting.  I also was not thinking rationally, was overly emotional, even angry.  This is how I KNOW hormones control these things, and you can't talk yourself in to feeling something that isn't there.  I "faked" sex a few times during that pregnancy, but was almost revolted by my husband.  How sad for him!

Then, after pregnancy . . .I'm a horndog.  If he looks at me, or walks in the room, I feel like my anatomy turns in to Mr. Ed chomping on carrots. OK, so that is too odd of an analogy, but I have literally had orgasms without him touching me.  Only lack of sleep will curb my sex drive, and I love this part of our life together.

My deal is this . . .quality of life is important, and it feels GOOD to be horny and have a great sex life with my husband.  It felt HORRIBLE to hate sex, during my pregnancy.  

I don't want to lose my ovaries, and be the equivalent of chemically castrated.  I want to research, and make it work for me, if it has to happen, because of course cancer is the worst possible of all scenarios.

Having everyone talk freely about these issues is SUCH a help, thank you!  I'm going to start reading and learning and making sure I do have a sex drive and a good quality of life if I have to have my ovaries removed for the good of my health.

Good luck to all of you and thank you for your open dialogue!!
Helpful - 0
135691 tn?1271097123
No offence, but I really don't appreciate someone referring to me as chemically castrated. Lets remember this is a site for OVARIAN CANCER - the treatment for Ovarian Cancer is hysterectomy followed by aggressive chemotherapy. I, like most of the other Ov/Ca women on this site (I know somedays it doesn't seem like anyone on here actually has cancer, but some do) had no choice. To use such a hurtful term is a little insensitive.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I laughed when I read that your dh was pouting because my sisters dh does the same exact thing. If she's not in the mood every other day he pouts & mopes around the house. After 25 years it drive her nuts but she loves him dearly and just lets him pout sometimes.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
THANKS MARY!!

((((((((((((((((((BIG HUGS))))))))))))))))))
Helpful - 0
106886 tn?1281291572
Hi,

I must be brief (many may be surprised that I CAN be brief:) But, since you have not had the surgery yet, you still have time to start doing the research necessary so that you will get all of the answers you need. And, good for you to be proactive.

Pick up a few books..."The Wisdom of Menopause" by Christianne Northrup, MD and "Natural Hormone Therapy" by Dr. Uzzi Reiss. Go to several websites such as Dr. Erika's (it is a dot com) and Christianne Northrup's too. You can do a google search by putting in the words, "Bioidentical Hormones" you can add words like "sex drive, libido, etc." You will be overwhelmed at first, most likely...I was! But, you will do yourself the biggest favor of your life if you get all the information you need so that you will be prepared if and when the time comes that you are not feeling like your old self.

After my radical hysterectomy (ovaries removed) I found myself crying in my doctor's office about 5 months after the surgery....I felt nothing...and I was sad and upset...and, found the whole sex thing to be somewhat disgusting for the first time in my life. I knew something was very very wrong. That started my search for help (the doctor gave me testosterone that very day and it helped, but I needed more and I needed to understand how the bioidentical hormones worked and how they are different from the synthetic hormonal replacement therapy drugs...you have to educate yourself on all this...you will be glad you did) and I am now on bioidentical estrogen, progesterone, and testosterone. I have been doing this for almost 7 years now and life is good. I am 53.

My problem is that I would like spouse (26 years tomorrow!) to be even more interested!!! But, hey...it is nice to feel womanly, and I know he appreciates that too.

Good luck to you. Do your homework. It will take time...but, get the help you need if you need it. Mary
Helpful - 0
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