Let me tell you something because this little story is really dear to me and has become part of my life.

When I was little I would get really upset watching wildlife programs. There was always a little rabbit that got killed by another preditor. My mum would say to me its ok darling they are just acting animals, bless her lol. My father would say no they are not she has to learn the truth life isn't always wonderful and is full of pain. As I got older I became a vegetarian as I couldn't bare to see animals suffering, I couldn't bare to see animal testing or elephants and whales being killed in the wild. As I got older I realised that people suffered to - needlessly and pointlessly. Children died, people were starving and the world was full of dreadfull people. My father prepared me so well to cope with how fuc**** cruel life could be. I felt helpless, I felt that what ever I did it wasnt enough. I was so acutely aware that I could never even make a dent in the suffering that goes on in this world. Then this one time I was watching something awful on the television - cant remember exactly what it was but I just sat there crying in anguish. "I cant do anything" I said to my father. He replied "but you are doing something Anna you are sharing their pain".

Empathy is a wonderful quality that everyone on this site has. We can't change the fact that some have cancer and some dont. We can't understand the cruel hand of fate that deals a young mother cancer when child murderers live to a ripe old age of 120. Whether we are in the 99% club or the 1% club or whatever fate deals us we care deeply. We pray for each other, we cry for each other, we laugh with each other and we are there for each other. No-one is led awake at night alone even if they are physically alone because we are all thinking about each other at the same time. We all of us have something to give. We are all on this horrible journey together and for some of us the journey ends but I for one will continue to suffer for those whos journey does not end no matter what my fate turns out to be.

Anna x

Please dont go anywhere. I have been really worried about you. I also had complications after my hyst. Not mrsa but still I wondered how I would make it one day to the next. If u want to talk my email is m_ehornsby***@****. Take care and hope to hear from you soon. Erika

Hi Sonie

I am new here. Waiting for surgery & diagnosis.

Don't really know what to say, but it seems to me that if you think often of the people you know here, and will miss them, then maybe you shouldn't go.

There has been some discussion hasn't there, about whether or not this should be a mixed site - I.E oc dx & non.oc (ovarian aparteid!). I guess if I end up in your shoes I could imagine finding it frustrating there being fewer who can relate and give useful advice based on experience. I don't know what I would want to do. I guess you would have to wade through a lot more threads. The 99% are always gonna out number the 1%.

My god I don't think anyone would say you are whining to express yourself or talk about your predicament, or ask for help & support. I get the feeling that folk here are of a better calibre than that.  I think that people would want to know, to do what they could, to support you.

Whatever you decide Sonie, I send you my love

     R x x

As a few of you know, I am in the 1% club. So if anyone has any kind of voting rights around here, it should be me! I don't want anyone to go. Most of us find this forum before our surgeries and NEED all of you. If only those with ovca were welcome, I probably never would have come back after surgery. You were all able to share your experiences, love, prayers, and support. Thanks to you, I felt as prepared as possible when I went into the hospital for my hysterectomy. I knew pretty much what to expect. I knew what to take with me for comfort and convenience. I knew what a lot of those stupid medical terms meant and could ask reasonable questions. I knew I had the entire Battalion behind me and not even the mightiest surgeon on earth could face up to my Cysters! I, for one, would never have made it through the dark days without you.

When I shared my CA-125 results with family and friends each  month, they would say "That's good! Right?" Here, it was "WWWOOOOHOOOO!! Break out the happy dances." Big difference, huh? It was for me!

I don't post a lot because I try to be positive when I do post. I don't want to scare some newby with some of the complications I've had. But I'm doing pretty good right now. Just had my 5th chemo and no nausea or vomiting this time (knock on wood--LOL). But I've never been afraid to post with questions or a request for cyber-hugs when I needed one. As far as I'm concerned, ovca-dx and non-ovca-dx are both WELCOME and NEEDED here. I personally find the number of non-ovca-dx who stick around to be very encouraging. They care enough to keep helping newbies when they could be forgetting this scare and getting on with their lives. There are still some unselfish people out there.

I'm so sad that you want to leave (& Grateful06) you have been fixtures on this site and you have given such wonderful strength & information to alot of scared women. My own trip down this road has been put on the back burner due to my dh's accident/recovery but now that he is well on his way I have to start taking care of myself. I feel alone all of the time but I know that is because I am the kind of person that keeps my feelings to myself, I won't even cry in front of anyone.
But the bottom line is if it hasn't been for all of the women on this site I probably would have went nuts. I have always thought that you (& Grateful06) were main staples on this site & a great strength of support. Please don't leave.

Rebel spirit states that the 1% club have the greater voting rights here and I so agree. You guys get to call the shots!

Well, Sonie, what surgery is next?  You can't post a statement like that and then cut & run on us!    As for whining, who on here has not??!!  I guess the moderator will disagree with me, but I thought that's what this site is for!  Good luck, best wishes, and you KNOW that you have my prayers.

Sonie, I will miss you! So forgive me for looking up one of your latest posts from elsewhwere but we do care and although we could have guessed it was the infection rearing it's ugly head again, I pass this on...
yesterday
i myself developed mrsa in my incision and to date,have had 2 additional surgeries besides my hyst...i have been dealing with this since january,and since the last surgery everything seemed to be going very well,however,within the last week the infection has came back,and the skin on the outter edges of the open incision grew itself to the inside new meat,and not attatched to each other,so they are wanting to cut it back a bit again,so it can close together...im so not wanting another surgery...are you going to a infectious disease doc???i was told,once we develope mrsa,we will never be rid of it..it may lay dormit,but never fully go away
     You must be so very tired Sonie!  I will keep you in my prayers!  MV

I don't post very often, but follow everyones "stories". I am in the 1% club. Those of us with ovca go through he**, but to read some of the other stuff you ladies go through and suffer makes my journey seem easy in comparison. Sonie I have been following all that you have been enduring, and think about you and search for your posts. Please don't leave the cysterhood. This is and hopefully will always be a place of information and comfort to many of us. Your story is needed, Sonie. You never know when someone will be walking in your shoes and may need yout advice.

i think that no matter what you should stay because your experiences whatever they may be will help someone else.  :)  

I think that all the ladies here are awesome. I too have not posted anything in a while and i have just been reading and i feel like i dont belong here.  I have however found some great support here and I am glad i came.  I may too move on but I have no life so i might be here for a while until I get one.  I have nothing to offer anyone here so i dont say anything.  I Dont feel worthy to even speak on this site because I have not gone through such things as the women on here.  I give respect for anyone that responds to people that come here looking for answers. I was afraid when i came here in january and now I am content. I would still be in panic mode but because of people like you soniek i wouldnt still be here.  You offer up good advice and questions and it helps everyone. I do hope that you would stay.  :)

Raven and Sonie --
I'm so sorry to hear about your travails. How hard it must be to be brave and optimistic all the time under such conditions! You are both on my prayer list; I do believe God listens to all of us.

Sonie, for what it's worth, last night I spent ages pouring over the hystersisters site searching for you...and we all know how hard that site is on the eyes!!!  Couldn't find you, figured you were having fun getting ready to move and so on.  I was sad to read what you wrote here and that you need more surgery, I felt so sick for you when I saw that.  I have missed you very much.  I think you have a LOT to offer on here, and on the MSN site (OK maybe knowledge you kinda wish you didn't have, look at what you have been through to gain it).  I don't know what else to say, it has been a hard week for everyone, but, I for one would love it if you kept in touch....  I think about you.... You are an amazing woman and you will come through this..
Love and best wishes from Katie

Sonie
You have had such a rough road what with Abbie and all. I am so sorry that you are having such a hard time healing!!
I will always remember you and you are in my thoughts and prayers. Please take care of yourself and have a prosperous life! So sorry to see you go, you were never any sort of whiner in my book!!
Kathy

Oh sonie I am so sorry to see you go. I myself have felt the very same as you and would not post because I was afraid of feeling like a whiner or scaring people. My recent surgery having been #9 and all so very different from what is the supposed "NORM" that I feel there is never anyone to ever really compare notes or get advice. Please rethink leaving because it really does good for you to get your feelings out and we are here to listen and share your pain. Maybe even give you a laugh or two. I love reading some of the posts the ladies write they make me smile and think of other things if only for a moment. You will always be in our thoughts and prayers. ALWAYS Remember that!!! Take care.
HUGS,
Darlyn

I really hope you stay.  I have felt a real connection with you.  I too have had incision problems.  When I am really frustrated with this gaping hole in my stomach, I think of how strong you are, 7 kids, new house, gaping hole in YOUR stomach.  You are always so strong and positive.  I just wanted you to know that you have inspired me and many others.  You are valuable here with a great deal of information to share.  Pleeeeeeeeese stay!  Deb