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God Bless you and welcome,
Kerrie
First...let me make a comment on your question about depression after hydrocodone withdrawal. Unfortunately yes, it is normal. I think that the hydrocodone messes with seratonin and dopamine production, and it can take your brain chemistry a while to get back to normal. How long ago did you stop taking the meds?
The other possibility is that you may have had an underlying depression that the meds were masking. You could speak with a Doctor and therapist about ways to help the depression..they'd likely suggest excercise, good nutrition, counseling, and possibly antidepressant medication.
Next..I have very good news. I am clean!!!!!
Yay!!!! Yippeee!!!!! I did it!!!
I can't believe I actually got through it, and I know that I could not have done it without the support of this forum and all you caring people.
At the wedding I was at this weekend, I was in so much pain..the car ride and all the standing flared me really badly..but I still choose to not take the meds, and I am so glad I did.
I still have a few withdrawal signs left, but not many. A bit of a tummy ache, very very low energy, and I'll find out tonight if the nightime restlessness is still there or not.
I know that now begins the real hard part, staying clean. That will be very hard, especially since I do really have bad back pain still. But, at this point the pain is lower than it used to be, and I'm willing to tolerate it to be free of the pill runing my life. I could babble on and on about how amazed I am that I was able to get through withdrawal. Honestly...the prospect of withdrawals scared the living (insert expletive here) out of me. So I just want anyone who is thinking about doing it, and reading this, to know that it is hard, but doable. The way I did it was this...I was taking aboaut 12 to 15 7.5 vicoprofens a day.
Day one of the taper I cut down to 7. Day 2 I cut down to 3. Then for the next two days I took only one at night, then two nights of half a pill, then nothing. I did use valium, and elavil to help, and I used Thomas and Pillpoppa's supplement recipies. The thing that I think helped the most was the acupunture. It REALLY worked to lower the withdrawals fast. I also used visual imagery of my own endorphins waking up and dancing around happily...silly stuff helps.
I hope that my energy returns soon. I feel so incredibly depleted right now.
Thank you all..from the depths of my soul, for being there. I will continue to need your help to stay clean, and to offer all I can to you all as well.
lots of love,
WW
Ikayk....depression is MOST definately the next symptom you will go through....but in a few days that cloud will be lifted and you will see things much clearer. I am still going through some depression and not wanting to do anything....dont feel motivated, etc. butI guess if your using pills for 9 months straight ( have been using for 10 years off and on) you have to figure its going to take a little time to get your body back to normal.....but taking those pills again will just set you back and you'll have to go through those damn withdrawals ALLLLLL over again....YUK..the worst!!! Hang tight, and we're all here behind our computer screens.....everyone here has been wonderful and definately helped me through this mess.... :)
For everyone that accomplishes getting 'clean' it gives me more hope that i can do this!
Keep strong, you are going to get happier and happier and stronger and stronger with each passing day!
Lv Jenny
My husband is using, but not addicted yet (as far as i can tell). I keep telling him that he doesn't want to go back to this hell. He absoluately HATES his new job, and is looking for anything to help get him through it. I tell him to leave the job then, it's not worth it. Find something else, continue collecting unemployment, anything except getting addicted again!
I need to get my addiction past me... all i want to do is 'live' again!
I feel so lost inside my own head that is shut down right now. I feel like my brain has been taken over by the pills, it's shutdown and closed to all my real emotions that i used to be able to feel.
I miss myself so much, and i see my kids getting older and older, and i wonder how much of that i am missing too!
I remember when i could have it all, still feel, and take the drugs recreationally. Then, one day, it all caught up with me, and i was an addict. I could no longer be without the medication, it owned me!
How the hell did i ever get myself into this mess!!!!
:(
Lv Jenny
And congrats WW, for surviving and conquering your addiction! I think we all know that we are MUCH better off without the meds -- its just so damn easy to open up the bottle and pop a pill. I think this battle, we all face, will only make us stronger and wiser! I have always believed that "everything happens for a reason," but sometimes "the reason" takes a while to reveal itself. May God RICHLY BLESS each of you today. lkayk
The L-Tyrosine will help your brain be able to produce its own endorphins again, and that will help with the depression. So will aerobic excercise. So will Acupuncture. I've not heard about the supplement someone else wrote about that is a seratonin precursor, but I'll look into it. It sounds interesting.
I have a question...how long does the sleeplessness last? I didn't get the restlessness last night, but it was still very hard to get a deep sleep. I only got 4 hours.
I"m still stunned that I got through this part of it. I wasn't sure that I could do it.
Jenny, I'm so sorry things are going badly for you..I can sense the despair in your writing. Please know that we are all here for you, supporting you and caring. I felt that I had lost myself as well, and I know it is possible to get yourself back.
love,
WW
WW
joec: 5-HTP is an EXCELLENT supplement to take in order to stabilize one's mood. It's also a very effective sleep aid! If you have the means to get it (it is a bit pricey), I highly recommend it.
Kristen: hope you can hammer the point home with the bf about the guilt he's layin on you. We males can be such royal anus's!
WW: I extend a wholehearted "congrats to YOU" for conquering your addiction and staying strong! Although you say the REAL work begins now, you've gotten the haze cleared enough to be able to actually DO the work right? Just takes a bold first step ;-)
Jenny: I guess the hub's job didn't light the fire? Well, my advice remains - try to focus on YOU if you can! But I know it's oh-so-hard under your circumstances so what can I say? Trust in yourself and the prospect of something better awaiting you...it DOES happen, just don't lose hope ok!!!
ikayk: depression is common in ANY withdrawal, but I have heard that Hydrocodone WD can have a "lingering" effect with the mood-aspect, where it may take up to a few MONTHS to fully recovery MENTALLY. Best to check with an MD if it gets any worse ;-). Also, try and eat somewhat healthy! Try Thomas' B6 recipe, and take a good multivitamin.
-G
Exodus 14:13,14---Do not be afraid. Stand firm and you will see the deliverance the Lord will bring you today......The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still.
Exodus 15:11---Who among the gods is like you, O Lord? Who is like you--majestic in holiness, awesome in glory, working wonders?
I also find this prayer to be most comforting:
Father, I ask You to bless me today. I am asking You to minister to my spirit at this very moment. Where there is pain, give me Your peace and mercy. Where there is self doubting, release a renewed confidence in Your ability to work through me. Where there is tiredness, or exhaustion, I ask You to give me understanding, patience, and strength as I learn submission to Your leading. Where there is spiritual stagnation, I ask You to renew me by revealing Your nearness, and by drawing me into greater imtimacy with You. Where there is fear, reveal Your love, and release to me Your courage. Where there is sin blocking me, reveal it, and break its hold over my life. Bless my finances, give me a greater vision, and raise up leaders and friends to support and encourage me. Give me discernment to recognize the evil forces around me, and reveal to me the power I have in You to defeat it. I ask You to to all these things in Jesus' name. Amen
I hope this helps! lkayk
i will let everyone know the results.
praise to WW!!!! that's so great. :) c