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Addiction: Substance Abuse Community
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does opiate addiction perminently change brain chemistry?
by Dindin, Jun 21, 2003 12:00AM
I have been using some form of opiate several times a day for almost 20 years. I am now 36 years old and really sick of it all. Its hard to believe that I have been like this for so long. I guess you could call me the ultimate functioning addict. (house, job, husband, children etc.) There is not a day that goes by that I dont wake up swearing to myself that I will not use, but we all know how that goes. I did try detox/rehab back in 1995. I was in a 30 day treatment program. They introduced me to NA but I didnt continue that after I got out. My question is this... Since I have been using so long, is it possible that I could need opiates for the rest of my life to function normally? The 30 days in rehab were miserable. After detox I was seriously emotionally unstable. I cant handle the way I feel when I am not using..... I am irrational, unstable, suicidal etc. Is it possible that I have altered my brain chemistry to a point of no return? I guess I really have not been clean longer than 30 days to find out (I am anticipating some of your reactions so I already said it) But 30 days is more than I can handle. I have thought about going on MMT but thats a joke. I have made numerious inquires to clinics only to be put on an indefinite waiting list or told that I need a doc to refer me.Could someone please give me some input on what I should do? If anything? I am at the point where no matter what I do, no matter how much I do. I am still miserable. My D.O.C. is "H" which I cant always get and I also talke pills everyday, ie; Vicodine, oxy's, perks, etc.
vicki
vicki
As Mrm said there are studies that suggest irreversible damage in some while other suggest that some can recover normal functioning.
Based on my own experience, I believe long-time chronic users like us will never return to a pre-using state. In liew of other solutions, I tend to think Methadone is the best course for us. I should say, however, that I have never used Methadone, so I'm basing my conclusions on incomplete evidence.
I hesitate to adopt MMT for a number of reasons. The main one is I object to the present laws and philosophy that govern the methadone clinic system. It is still conducted too much like a chemically based criminal parole system. Additionally, methadone's extreme withdrawal syndrome implies that, once dependant on methadone, one surrenders all power over one's life to the employees, high and low, of the clinic system. That is something I will never do. If I could receive MMT in a private medical setting, I believe I would have at least tried MMT by now.
I'm surprised at your reception at the clinic. The ones I contacted were more than anxious for me to enroll, albeit for their pointless 21-day detox. To go straight to MMT, I needed to prove I'd been clinically treated for opiate addiction and had failed. Not too hard to do after 30 years of using. Perhaps you should call a few more of them.
Thomas
peace,
amber
Thomas, I dont believe I can do this another 10 years like you. You sure give me some hope. Is your story posted here somewhere? What made you change? I still have this constant internal tug or war going on inside. The "me' that wants to get clean and the "me" who would love to stay loaded. What changed that for you? I have also heard about the MMT clinics and how your controled by the idiots that run the clinics and your dosed when they feel like it and it determines whether you bow down to them or not. Sounds like some dealers I've delt with in the past.
Do you know anything about buprenex or buprenorphine?(not sure of the spelling) Can a doc give you a script for this?
I have so many questions. I hope that I am not imposing on this message board but there is such little real help out there and you guys sound like you know what your talking about.
thanks
vickie
My hats off to you! Keep winning!
Nod
I didn't realize you weren't leaving the house either. I feel so bad for you. I agree that maybe you should take your b/f to the doc with you. I do have a little experience dealing with agoraphobia. My sister was a full blown agoraphobic, she did not leave her house at all in 2 years. I know you say yuk to the paxil, but honest to God, it changed her life. They gave her severe migraines at first too. They went away for the most part, she takes imitrex for the flare ups. She felt like **** for the first 3 months she was on it, but then it all just seemed to kick in. With those meds, buspar for bad panic attacks, and some counseling once a week, she's almost fine now. She also says that forcing herself to get on a treadmill every day helped her immensely. If you think that might help, drag one into your bedroom if you have to. I don't know if any of these things will help you, I just wish there was something more helpful I could do. I'm sure you have tried to calmly explain to your b/f how bad you feel, just keep assuring him that you will get help. I'll be thinking of you. Keep us posted.
suboxone physician locator:
http://buprenorphine.samhsa.gov/bwns_locator/index.html
Thomas
and found one right around the corner. Fate brought me to this message board today.
When I call what do I say? "I am a junkie looking for buprenex?"
What would be the best approach?
I hate when docs treat patients like **** as soon as they find out they are an addict....its like we are poison to them.
Remember, this is not the time to hold back on your doctor. Tell the doc the truth about how much you've been using. If you enter suboxone treatment, come back and tell us how you're doing. I'm particularly interested. Medical treatment isn't in my financial picture now, but somewhere down the road I want to try bup, too. Good luck!
Thomas
http://www.etfrc.com/SuboxoneResources.htm