Question Title: Personality Disorder?

I just recently had a long conversation with my husband over his son - he is 15.7 years of age. My husband and I have been married for 5 years and finally I just lost it. This child plays with wrestling dolls and watches endless hours of cartoons each day - that is his life. He has no friends, is inactive - never going outside - or getting physical activity. He feels victimized by any given situation. He has no empathy for anyone and he tells everyone that he does not like to be touched or does not like to smile.
He walks around all slumped over. He is miserable!
My husband says he has been like this since a child. I think he needs counseling - my husband and his X think otherwise. Any suggestions?

Dear Merry,

Your stepson's behavior is certainly atypical for a fifteen-year-old and is suggestive of a depressive disorder. One would expect him to be more solidly engaged with his peers and to have a fairly active life. A child mental health evaluation would be reasonable - I would strongly urge it. Perhaps a reasonable place to start would be a discussion with his pediatrician. You could voice your concerns, appropriate medical workups, if needed, could be done, and a referral made for a mental health evaluation. The pediatrician's opinion might be useful to your husband.

The information provided in this forum is inteneded for general education. Always address particular questions about your child's health to your pediatrician or health care providers.

*Keyword: Depression, Teens, Adolescence

Thank you for your comments. I cannot convince my husband to get him help - because he (the child) has no friends - the parents have no basis of judgement - as to whether of not this is "normal behavior". They will not hear of treatment for their son - and are convinced he is very normal. Although many teachers have said otherwise......

I will keep trying. Although I have suggested seeing someone time and time again - his parents seem to think that this abnormal behavior is acceptable. Frankly - it is ruining my marriage.

Thanks for your suggestions....I will keep plugging away.

Dear Merry,

It can be very frustrating when someone you care about needs help, and the people in a position to obtain the help fail to discern the need.

There are many helpful pamphlets available from your local child guidance/child mental health agencies and/or schools, which describe 'signs' of emotional problems. Perhaps you can locate one and have your husband check it out. Also, perhaps the folks at school can request a meeting with you and your husband to convey their concerns. You can also check at your local library for information. Finally, the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry has available, on the Internet, a series of useful documents entitled Facts for Families. These are straightforward, easy to read, fact sheets re: the more common emotional and mental health problems of children and teens. Good luck, and keep up your efforts. Dr. KDK