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Neurology (Expert Forum)
PART TWO: Apparently, I do not have ALS OR MS...MAYBE SUICIDE IS BETTER?
This forum is for questions and support regarding neurology issues such as: Alzheimer's Disease, ALS, Autism, Brain Cancer, Cerebral Palsy, Chronic Pain, Epilepsy, Fibromyalgia, Headaches, MS, Neuralgia, Neuropathy, Parkinson's Disease, RSD, Sleep Disorders, Stroke, Traumatic Brain Injury
PART TWO: Apparently, I do not have ALS OR MS...MAYBE SUICIDE IS BETTER?
by mavinlong, Sep 20, 2003 12:00AM
Please see post below for background info.
I am wooried. For the first time since the onset of my symtoms began I actually considered suicide - seriously.
I am told I do not have ALS OR MS BUT my doctors have not told me what I DO have. I asked for the opinions of three doctors for $14.95 US...there answers on on my original post.
The neuro. here is Beijing wants me to get an Xray of my spine and see a bone doctor AND see a neuropsychologist as well has her previous neuro. professor about my scapulur winging.
Why do you think the Chinese neuro wants me to neuropsychologist - I do not have brain damage!
Also, in 1992 I woke up with sudden onset focal dystonia (writers' cramp). Could there be a correlation between my dystonia and present symptoms.
The cord compression in my C spine is not serious and my Canadian neuro. said that maybe a virus could be causing my symtoms. Where "could" he be going with this comment.
Should I be tested for toxins???
Living with progressive weakness and symptoms, but no diagnosis
(I have heard "Maybe or that can cause my symptoms") is becoming impossible. I NEED a doctor to give me a definate diagnosis or life is not worth living.
Note thatI am 39 year old caucasion with a new baby daughter and wife. Thus, I have a responsibility to find out what is going on asap.
What else can I DO to get a DEFINATE diagnosis?? Why can't my doctors on Canada and China figure out what is going on?
Thank you for your help.
I am wooried. For the first time since the onset of my symtoms began I actually considered suicide - seriously.
I am told I do not have ALS OR MS BUT my doctors have not told me what I DO have. I asked for the opinions of three doctors for $14.95 US...there answers on on my original post.
The neuro. here is Beijing wants me to get an Xray of my spine and see a bone doctor AND see a neuropsychologist as well has her previous neuro. professor about my scapulur winging.
Why do you think the Chinese neuro wants me to neuropsychologist - I do not have brain damage!
Also, in 1992 I woke up with sudden onset focal dystonia (writers' cramp). Could there be a correlation between my dystonia and present symptoms.
The cord compression in my C spine is not serious and my Canadian neuro. said that maybe a virus could be causing my symtoms. Where "could" he be going with this comment.
Should I be tested for toxins???
Living with progressive weakness and symptoms, but no diagnosis
(I have heard "Maybe or that can cause my symptoms") is becoming impossible. I NEED a doctor to give me a definate diagnosis or life is not worth living.
Note thatI am 39 year old caucasion with a new baby daughter and wife. Thus, I have a responsibility to find out what is going on asap.
What else can I DO to get a DEFINATE diagnosis?? Why can't my doctors on Canada and China figure out what is going on?
Thank you for your help.
Doctor's Answer
by CCF-Neuro-M.D.-CS, Sep 20, 2003 12:00AM
Sir, I do not have any further medical advice other then what I suggested the other day. Your case is very complex, and without having the opportunity to examine you and review your previous tests i can not be more specific. Perhaps seeing the second neurologist in China would be helpful, and provide a fresh opinion.
I am very conered that you are suicidal. I would recommend that you immediately inform your wife and go to your local hospital to be evaluated. Regardless of what is causing your symptoms, if you are having suicidal thoughts you need to be evaluated by a psychiatrist immediately. Again, you shoul dinform your wife and immediately proceed to your local hospital for evaluation.
I am very conered that you are suicidal. I would recommend that you immediately inform your wife and go to your local hospital to be evaluated. Regardless of what is causing your symptoms, if you are having suicidal thoughts you need to be evaluated by a psychiatrist immediately. Again, you shoul dinform your wife and immediately proceed to your local hospital for evaluation.
Also, I notice that when I sit down my small toes sometimes fall asleep and when I sleep with my hand resting on my stomach a half of both arms fall asleep similar to carpel tunnel syndrone.
Could this be connected with winging?
new
I can understand your frustration and fear. You sound absolutely desperate for help. What you have to understand is that having thoughts of suicide is not a normal response to having unexplained symptoms.
It is normal to seek out several opinions and advocate for your own health care. But considering suicide just because the doctors cannot make a firm diagnosis is absolutely outside the normal range of response for this situation. You must trust that this is true, and seek help.
Think how your wife and daughter will feel. Your wife will feel as though she failed you, and when your daughter grows big enough to understand, she will blame herself.
You have to trust that impartial people are telling you that this is not a normal way to respond to having undiagnosed symptoms.
Get help immediately.
I was left without diagnosis, in fact I still don't have a diagnosis, but I have had recent blood tests (which I had to arrange myself) which show I am vitamin B12 deficient.
A lot of the symptoms you have, including the sore bottom sitting on a hard seat, sore feet when standing and numbness in my toes and fingers are common symptoms of mine. I also take cramp regularly in both my feet and hands (even the side of my face on occassions).
If you read my answer to the question "Sound Sensitive" (dated 16/09/03) which is eight questions below your question, I reply to Spring and explain the problems I went through.
I don't want to give you false hope here, b12 perhaps is not your problem or even part of it, but if it has not been looked at then I think it would be very worth your while.
Please hang in there, you have every chance of getting to the bottom of this problem one day. You can't do that if you are not here.
Take care of yourself
Graham.
i have the same symptoms as movelong. i thought that the reason is my spine, so i started seen chiropractor. That did not help. i think that after last visit it got even worse. I have folowing symptoms for yeasr, and it just don't go away and all doctors says, that i'm healthy.
chronic back pain, facial pain, abdominal pain, fatigue, fallin asleep arms and legs, cramps, tinglings, abnormal stiffness of neck, back, lower back, arms, legs...which just cannot be treated by streatching, my fingers hurt, my nails cracking, little blisters pooping up on my fingers, all joints cracking, muscles are week and stiff, i feel my bones, forearms and shins, i have ringing in my ears every day..i have swolen nodes on my lower back(i'm not sure if these swellings are lymph nodes)...like my whole body is in incredible chronic pain and doctors say I'm Ok. Lol And i hear sound in my head..like squeeking noise...
last time i returned from gym, my face turned red red, and like mosquito bites poped up all over my body. I felt terrible. After like 45 min it disapeared.
And thats tough life. I do'nt know what's wrong with me, but i deffinately can tell that it hurts.
Every move i make...cracks. The only position that i fall asleep is on my back, because in any other position, the back just hurts more.
And I'm not bad looking guy. I look in preatty good shape, nobody would say that i'm fallin apart. I just don't know what to do, to feel better. I actually feel like dying.
If anyone can help....
JOHN. 28 years old
There was a time in my life when I was suicidal. I understand the desperation and hopelessness you are feeling.
First, find yourself a good counselor or psychiatrist. Think of them like a mirror to help you see youself, or like a chalkboard where you can write out your problems, reorganize, and rethink them.
Also, do not shy away from trying antidepressants. Suicidality can result from chemical imbalances that are very real and may not be something you can "will" yourself out of, at least from square one. Take them in order to gain a little relief, then go off them later when you have had some counseling. This approach works for some people.
Finally, starting right now, step back and look at the larger picture. Killing yourself solves YOUR pain, but it creates even more pain in the world by hurting so many other people. It is like an explosion, where your pain floods outward to affect all the people you know. Better to treat your pain from where it is now. It CAN be treated.
Another approach is to think about whether you have done everything in this life that you need to. When Beethoven went deaf (a terrible fate for a composer and musician) and realized that his doctors didn't know why and couldn't help him, he considered suicide. Then he rejected the idea, deciding instead that he "wasn't finished yet." And he wasn't-- that was in 1803, when he had only composed 3 symphonies out of the 9 he finally wrote. We wouldn't have the famous 5th symphony if he had killed himself.
So think about it. And wait. As a concrete step, try making a large sign that says "NOT YET" and put it up somewhere in your house. Really.
Sometimes we get addicted to the struggle, and the struggle becomes the end and not the phase through which we pass.
Six years. It took me six long years to achieve an accurate diagnosis. Do not shy away from neuropsychological evaluation because your diagnosis, more often than naught, depends upon it. Mine did.
Take care,
LJ
Having had my 1st husband (my 1st love) commit suicide at age 23 when our beautiful first-born son was only 1 month old (me 20, nearly killed me. Having that beautiful, tender-hearted, kind, son do the same thing 22 years later (residue from his father's death I believe) put a world of suffering (like you are feeling now) on me that I will never be able to get over in this lifetime.
Please know John - this is NOT a condemnation or judging of any kind on you. Just know that this intense pain you are feeling due to circumstances in your life right now that seem beyond control, is NOT Permanent.. Suicide is. The gift of life is all we have - good, bad or ugly. THINGS WILL CHANGE fro you -nothing in life stays the same. And I'm sure YOUR BEAUTIFUL LITTLE SON NEEDS HIS FATHER... I raised a son without his - he was so sad sometimes and it broke my heart.
I've tried suicide a couple of times when I was younger (Back then I was just in so much pain but I'm GLAD now they didn't work!) Now I'm pushing the half century mark (oohhh...) and struggling with much the same problem you are - and no answers for long time.
#1 - Please John, listen to the great advice you have been give and see someone - if that entails going to an ER then so be it! I have thought on that option more than once as of late! But I know I do not want to put my other kids through that kind of pain no matter how much pain I'm in. And the pysch drug I am now on gave me the emotional strength I needed to hang on. It's not a cure-all but it is a start - and my guess is the physical pain