I am 51, single mom with many "diagnosed pain syndromes, and other pain issues in spine". As a young girl I started getting panic attacks. (age 11) Due to abuse. Married @ age 16, more abuse, long story short...became a Jehovah Witness as did my abusers who never d/c`d
...
[More] this perverted behavior and hid it from the church. I grew up and wanted to leave the "church" thinking I would return one day as I was still brainwashed.
After a turbulant life and 3 marriages I was working 2 jobs raised 5 stepchildren, I have 2 boys, one has chosen to "disown" me and his younger brother because we are Christians and believe in the KJV of the Bible. Appx.15 yrs. ago the panic came back along with pain that started in my ribs and absolutly took control of every part of my life unless I had a vicodin and could curl up in a comfortable position. The doctor had me on so many meds I sometimes wondered if he just was hoping I would not keep coming in. He NEVER took notes, and felt if I said I was doing well, that he had to change things to "keep the kettle stirred up". He contradicted himself at EVERY VISIT! If I asked for a new drug lyrica, he would say no....the next visit he would say he has a new drug called lyrica that he wanted me to take. What a joke!
I had my spleen removed due to trauma at age 7 and have continuously battled pneumonia ever sense.
I have a intrathecal pain pump that this doctor wanted me to get by another physician. Big mistake (more later.). This doctor takes the credit for "doing something for me" however he say`s the pump should never have been put in by the "surgeon" as I have had 2 recalled pumps and ALOT of residuial pain and even though the recall is a class 1 recall. I am the one to be punished as NOW each doctor is pulling away, even as I am going down on the oral meds. Mental health, after a lifetime of getting help with agrophobia, panic and depression that I thought I would not live through....dropped me 2 years ago saying that I needed to get my pain issues resolved before coming back!!!? My pain issues are for my entire life. I now am in a hospital bed 24/7, in home care comes in 1 hr. 15 min. a day to help me. I am on oxygen 12 hrs. daily. I have wheelchair with a motor to get fresh air if I choose. This may seem bad enough, but now everyone wants me gone. and off meds. The 2nd. pump has a granuloma, however it has come loose frome the spinal area and the tests do not show the catheter or tips where the granuloma is. The test say`s there is metal fragments; undeterminded....in L. abdomen. I have developed COPD and so many painful, "spin offs" due to this lack of caring for my condition that if not foor my belief in my loving Savior and mt adorable son who had to move from me at age 16 because he was not a caretaker and even though he was in high school I had to move into an "assisted living" facility. My son is now 22, going to school full time and working full time, he has so much worry about me and has migraines and I pray that I can get help before he becomes an alcoholic (does not have much time yet)...I was told while down in san Sum Clinic in Santa Barbara that I had to set my mind on the fact that if I was going to live any kind of life that I will be addicted to meds. I have always kept it in check except I feel very alone as far as the medical profession goes. They have dropped the ball and could care less if I was alive or dead or addicted to jello! as long as they were not called on the carpet to help my defence. I am done and now that I realize that BOTH of my pumps were recalled and the doc`s knew it and now even know it, I feel so angry because I had no clue as to what was going on as far as the pain that the pumps have caused. Any suggestions? Am I in the right area?
[Less]
8-27-09
my journey is almost to sad and painful because of the doctors who treat me. i cant speak of it but
more than a little at a time. i have my God and my precious s...
Hi, i read your storry and was moved.....m name is Elaine and i am 23 years old..i am also a christian and i just wanted to let you know that bothYou and your son are in my thoughts and prayers. May God help you and bless you