Just a quick note to say hi! your story is very moving and i hope you can find help in your life keep trying and try to live in the here and now the past will keep hurting if you let it in terms of anger at your past every time you get angry at your past you are letting "it" happen all over again and by not getting angry bout the past you are no longer being abused it quite litterally becomes a thing of the past and not of the now
greetings from peter from denmark