About Me: Female, 32, W Springfield, MA, member since Oct 2011
I am 28 years old. I have a beautiful son who is everything to me who I want to give so much more....I have Interstitial Cystitis (apparently, but I beg to differ) which plagues me literally everyday. The pain gets worse with time. I have severe burning, urgency and fre
[More]quency, along with other (some even new) symptoms. I know my body and I know that aside from this, I never get sick. I feel like my body is trying to tell me something and I'm determined to figure out what. I refuse to believe a diagnosis that literally means "your bladder wall is inflamed but there is no medical reason for it that can be found". I've had just about every test possible, obviously negative on all of them. Recently I've started having bleeding two days after having sex. For the past 3 months, everytime I have sex I bleed and burn SO incredibly bad it's unexplainable. And it's always TWO days after. Not the same day or the next day.. those days I'm fine. No pain during sex either. But the burning I get is just incredible. Usually subsides into my "normal" pain after about 3-4 days. I also have bloating and full feeling in my stomach, frequent heartburn, hypercholesterolemia (sp?), slightly low thyroid, and am overweight (5'6", 190lbs). I've been tested for std's several times. Nothing. Have had the same partner for ten years. This has singlehandedly RUINED my life. I had to drop out of college, lost my job, my house, my car, my family because I became addicted to pain meds because of this problem, which I can no longer acquire now so I am literally on my own with this. I am dying, losing hope more and more each day. I can't do the things with my son that I want to do and most of the time I cannot even take care of him and have to have his father or fathers family watch him. Doing simple things I used to take for granted have become a monumental effort. It's amazing, but not in a good way. I have yet to meet or talk to anyone who has the same problems as me. I've talked to many people with IC, but the majority have pelvic pain/pressure as their main symptom, whereas mine main symptom is the urgency/frequency and burning. Also, most if not all of them go through flares. And their flares last a few days. I don't have flares. My GOOD days last a few days. Not even. I have 2-4 good days a month on average. I have researched this so much that I am practically an expert in the field of urology. I have every book ever written on IC and bladder problems. I've tried several different herbal remedies and dietary supplements. I've been prescribed every kind of pill imaginable but to no avail. And yes, I've tried the "IC diet" also. Been there, done that. I am desperate. Desperate for answers. For a cure. For a NORMAL life. I don't want tons of money or a mansion or a fancy schmancy car. I just want to be normal. I used to be a happy person. I loved life. I loved creating things. Making jewelry and tons of other random things. Art journaling. Writing. Now I no longer have interest in anything. No motivation. I always think to myself the same thing: "what's the point?". It won't bring me happiness. I'll just be focused on my pain and won't enjoy anything I used to love anymore. I'm not trying to go on a "poor me poor me" spree here or anything. But I cannot even convey to you how much my life has changed since this first started in January of 2007 - six months after my son was born. I'm now a depressed, angry, bitter person. I'm not even human anymore. I've fought this for so long and put on the happy face and tried to distract myself and pretend its not there. But it has gotten so bad that I can't do that anymore. Doctors won't help me. I have crappy insurance so half of them don't even take the effort to really help me. I can't try Interstim because of my insurance. Which I heard has helped many people with IC. Emergency room doctors just tell me the same thing every time I go "there's no bacteria in your urine so you don't have a UTI. Go see your urologist." Yeah...tell me something I DON'T know. Life is just one big blur now. I'm just on autopilot. I'm jaded.....
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