About Me: Female, 50, Everman, TX, member since Feb 2012
I am a 46 year old women who does know what to do. I have lost my will to keep going but will not kill myself because I love my son. I have chronic back pain and major panic disorder and have been under the care of a dr. for many years. Insurance ran out and for the
[More] last 20 years I have been taking 10 vicodin a day, 4 soma's, and at least 2 of the 2mg. xanax. I do not get out of bed, maybe shower once a week. I don't do anything, it hurts to much. It got worse when I lost some of my pain pills this week,got wet, and I had to cut down the dosage almost in half. I liked to died and am not kidding. I had the runs so bad, horrible cramps, and I had a nervous breakdown and put a knife to my husbands neck over a stupid commit he made that i misunderstood. I use to work 2 jobs owned my home for 20 years had 2 cars paid for and now I have lost it all. I don't buy drugs from the street, I just feel this way from what I have to take for the pain. It is to much to bare without the med's my God can anyone help me? I even had 2 teeth break in half in the front of my mouth and I have lost all desire to interact with anyone. I hate myself for what I am doing to my family. Is there help for someone like me with no insurance?
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