About Me: Male, 38, Charlotte, NC, member since Jul 2012
I was diagnosed with a rare form of cancer a year ago in 2011, during my treatment I was prescribed pain medication. The pain medication was very effective in managing the pain at first, however, after ahile I graduated to s higher dosage then a higher dosage and so on
[More]. Over a period of time, my body became dependant on the pain medication. I'd never had an issue with alcohol or pain medication in the past, it wasn't something I craved or really wanted. I've never bought narcotics illegally nor have I ever taken anything but what the doctor prescribed. Once my tumor shrank, the pain went away however I'd been on medication so long, I experienced my first withdrawal which unfortunately I believe put me in the hospital. My doctor believed it to be small blood clots in my lungs but I knew differently. Unfortunately, my doctor nor I ever thought to ween off the medication, like I said I don't really put anything too harmful into my body. I don't even drink caffeine. So, not wanting to go back to the hospital, I maintained on my remaining medication and decided to go to Subox Doctor out of fear. My first dose was 8 mg a day and I have weened, without any serious issues over 6 months, to about a 1/4 of a 2mg strip once a day. Over the next day or two, I will ween to an 1/8 a strip then skip days. I know at that amount basically it has no therapeutic effect, however the fear has crept in and to quit just brings back a bad memory. I understand the science behind it, I studied medicine in college amd no matter how I work the chemistry, the ego of the brain takes over and tells me I'm getting something out of such a small dose. I can honestly say that I feel such a small dose and my pupils validate the feeling. Anyway, I'm looking forward to talking with others and reading other's success stories. Hopefully, through the experience of others I can find strength/motivation to kill the anxiety and fear.
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