I have a four year old now that has been out of control since he was 2 we thought it was a stage and he would grow out of it. Well he has not he has no impulse control, hits, bites, kicks, took a knife and carved into our wood banister. We have rules and he knows them but he cannot seem to follow them. We have tried everything from the Kazakian method, to grounding him from things he likes, using behavior chart, stickers, and prizes for good behavior. I am at my wits end, he is destructive, disruptive, it is like he has a switch at time he is very calm and sweet and at times he is out of control. Says mean things, throws things, has tantrums in public, get very upset if he does not color in the lines perfect or track a letter exactly on the line. He is very smart he can already use screws and put things together. The Dr's say they do not want to treat him he is too young, my husband’s family his father and his brother and very smart and geniuses in their industries of computers and aeronautical engineering but they cannot function socially and abuse alcohol. I am fearful that this is my son’s issue. Where do I go for help? I have an older son who is very well behaved and does well despite the fact that he has dyslexia. People do not understand why we cannot control he has escaped from the house, escapes when in public to the point that we have to keep him on a kid restraint line for safety so he does not get away. I feel like we have to keep him under lock and key at all times. If your eyes are not on him he is getting into trouble. We even had to go as far as to get a bright pink one because the other ones he thought were cool and a toy. Please help.
The problem with really intelligent kids is that they problem solve so fast. And the problem with 4 year olds is that they don't have alot of self control. Put it together and ya - you've got problems. Throw the possibility of ADHD into the mix and everything gets a lot worse. I really don't know if he has ADHD. How long ago did the doctors see him and what kind of a doctor saw him? The reason I ask is that In October 2011, the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) released new clinical practice guidelines for the diagnosis, evaluation, and treatment of ADHD. It now does cover 4 year olds. However, "For preschool-aged children, evidence-based behavioral therapy alone is recommended as the first step toward treating ADHD symptoms and associated impairment." So even if meds are not given - the therapy is recommended. They can not just ignore the situation and say come back later on.
You can read about it here. http://www.medscape.com/viewarticle/759086?src=nl_topic
If you do want to check out the ADHD aspect - this site has a pretty good list of things to look out for. http://www.rxlist.com/attention_deficit_hyperactivity_disorder_adhd/article.htm#tocb
And, of course, its possible he does not have ADHD but is an overactive, intelligent 4 year old. Many of his actions are not that extreme. I suggest you read all of this post from the child behavior forum from someone with kind of similar problems. There are a lot of good suggestions of ways to help, and I think that many would be helpful for you.
The link is http://www.medhelp.org/posts/Child-Behavior/6-year-olds-behavior/show/1714289#post_7850204 Hopefully, some of this helps. Please post if you have any more specific questions about ADHD. You also might want to try posting on the child behavior forum for other ideas on working with your child.
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