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does my son have ADHD
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does my son have ADHD

my 4.5 yrs old son was prematurely born at 34 weeks. he had delayed milestones of development during his childhood,but it was usually claimed due to his prematurity and he usually catched at a later age and did it well;for example he crawled at 13 month ,walked at 20 month ,had delayed development of speech that at age of 4 he was talking like 3 yrs child. I am a working busy mother with older children and got pregnant with him at age of 42 & was very dissapointed by then, he didn't go to daycare& was cared for by a maid of foreign culture and language that fed him and let him watch TV .. I cared for his routine issues but didn't talk to him much or teach him as his older siblings..problem started when he went to kindergarden at age of 4 without any idea of how to hold a pencil or colour or any educational background. teacher immeditely started teaching alphabets ,numbers & give homeworks to write with tracing 1st then without tracing later & my son couldn,t cope with all that . When i spoke to her she said all his peers in class were doing the job except my son. i was afraid he may have learning problem or it is just his usual delay in development & he'll catch up.I seeked medical advice and IQ testing & test for ADHD were done during which he was very uncooperative &didn't respond  to the psychatrist and she finally diagnosed after asking me questions he has mild- moderate ADHD. she prescribed to him Tegretol but i refused to give it so she prescribed multivitamins & omega 3 for 3 month with later follow up..I read so much about educational development and behavioral therapy and i gave him my full attention with toys to improve his motor skill & increase his attention together with speech therapy.. he improved a lot and knew the numbers , alphabets and started to hold the pencil properly and write by properly tracing dots ,can count up to 15 but needs me by his side at home & it takes long time to finish 1 page& in school he is not writing anything if teacher is not by his side urging him..he is very happy at school , he has friends ,his teachers say he is of normal activity &not impulsive but they advice to let him repeat this year as he will be more mature and capable.. I was against this idea and thought i'll continue my efforts wih him even during summer time without the stress of school so that he catches up until for the last 10 days he refuses to do anything related to studying in school or home . he tells me i ",ll not study or write" and insist on that regardeless of any encouragement,or promises,or deprivation of something he likes or time out..he may sit doing nothing for 2 hours infront of his book but insisting he,ll not do it & he really doesn't do it
I,m confused is this a developmental delay or ADD ?? should i let him repeat this year or go on medications??  I was against the diagnosis and i felt the psychiatrist rushed into it or was she correct and i am denying mother??
Avatar_m_tn
    Probably a good idea not to try Tegretol as it is not the typical ADHD medication.  It is used more for seizures and bipolar - you might want to google it.
    In the US your son would be to early for Kindergarten.  Don't know how it works in your country.  But it is always an advantage for a boy to be older then the other kids and not be the youngest in the class.  So I would definitely give him another year.  It also is much easier to do that now then later.
   It does sound like he is frustrated with all the studying.  I would back off a bit for now.   Its hard to say if the taking time is also due to ADD or just frustration.  I would give him another year at kindergarten and if he still is having problems, then get him re-evaluated.
   Hope this helps.  Let me know if you need more information.  Good Luck!
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