the right decision?

my son will be eight years old next month and was diagnosed with ADHD and ODD three days ago. the psychiatrist put him on guanfacine and vyvanse. i feel horrible every time i make him take the pills and question whether i am doing the right thing even though i have tried all other solutions already. the meds. have not taken much effect yet. he is extremely intelligent for his age and i just want him to get better so he can be capable and confident in his full potential. he has many alarming issues both at home and in school. he has gotten so out of hand that i no longer go into public places with him, the ones that we weren't already banned from. we have been virtually disowned by family members and my friends. he has no friends as a direct result of his disorder. he is extremely aggresive (aggressive) toward other children, adults, and so on. he has low self esteem and recently started using foul language out of the blue. he often has tantrums that come from nowhere and is easily agitated. he never shuts up or sits still. his teachers and i keep in contact often and they are already getting fed up with his behavior and it's only been three weeks. we have to have a meeting with the school counselor, principal, and psychiatrist. my son is also extremely argumentative and always has to have the last word. he is even bullying other children at school for no reason. please help me come to terms with whether i have made the right decision or if there in fact are other options left. therapy had no affect either.

[tinkerbell101]

I am asking the same question. So far I have had no repsonses :(

I hope you get the answers you are seeking, I know what a tough decision it is to make to medicate your child, I am filled with the same guilt and was looking for some feedback also. Good luck :)

[dollyn]

have you read what other parents have gone threw with putting there children on medicine's.

the side effects can make things even worse,than what you are dealing with right now.
another person posted about vyvanse  and wanted to know what others went threw with this medicine.

I think that people and doctors need to look at everything that is going on in a child's life and what has happen already to see if this is the real problem.

my son was on 2 different medicines adderall (adderrall) and then concerta and then started having seizures in 2006 and still to this day is even with trying 5 to 6 different medicines and surgery to put in the VNS this year in june.and still having seizures every day.

The medicine changed him and I will not put him back on any more medicines for add or adhd with the facts that he could get worse .

try omega 3 and Vitim b6 and see if that help's.

[margypops]

pull up the many posts /threads here if you will scroll down you will see many folks there with similar problems ..Good Luck I agree with  dollyn

[allmymarbles]

Most of the childhood problems posted here are mild or questionable. Yours most definitely is not. This is truly a case for the experts. Has he always been like this? Does he have siblings? How does he act with them?

[specialmom]

I just wanted to say that I really feel for you.  Your son's story must be heartbreaking as a mother.  I agree with allmymarbles.  Medication can be very scarey but your situation is extreme.  Of course, you'd hate to create new problems for your child.  So have professional help here would be beneficial.  But to feel so isolated and alone as you as a family must feel-----  I just wish you all the best and hope that somewhere you find the formula that is going to help.  I've got a son with a developmental delay and at times I have felt very alone.  It is hard when you sense someone doesn't approve or doesn't want to be around you or your beloved kid (and worse, to be told so as you have) is a bitter pill to swallow.  I don't ever say this at medhelp as you never know how it comes across, but I just can't help it---  I'm going to say a prayer for you and your son.  My hope for your son and all those kids who've had such a tough struggle just to get by is that suffering makes victory all that much sweeter.  I wish you all the luck in the world.

[Sandman2]

One other  thought because you say, "the meds have not taken much effect yet."  Good Doctors will typically start out on low doses and then slowly increase until the desired effect is reached.  While this takes time and communication, it is the safest approach.  I say this because "communication" is extremely important.  Make sure you let your Doctor know what is going on.  If the medications do start to work, then therapy will have a much better chance of working. Please remember, that even if the medications do work, the followup therapy is crucial.  Meds are not just some magic pill, there is still a lot that has to be done to help him reach his potential He should have a special education designation in school to protect him.  If you haven't already done so, you really need to start educating yourself on ADHD and OCD so that you can understand what is going on with your son.  You might try reading "ADHD and Me,  What I learned from lighting fires at the dinner table," by  Blake Taylor.    Basically, "the Cal freshman tells how he made the ADHD work in his favor."  Two other good books - "Driven to Distraction" by Hallowell, and "The Gift of ADHD", by Honos-Webb.
  I have worked with a first grader who was very similar to your child.  His parents finally tried medication and the results were amazing.  The father commented that they were able to take him out for dinner for the first time ever.  By fifth grade he was composing and playing his own music and winning awards.  So there is hope.
  So don't feel bad.  I would feel bad if I had left some stone unturned in trying to help my child.  Would you feel bad if you gave your child an antibiotic when he needed it?
The main thing is -  keep talking with your doctor, keep educating  yourself and your child. Realize that there is no simple answer - the med process may take time to get it right and even then it is only the start of a life long journey.    Good Luck

[Sandman2]

   Just saw this post, these books might be worth checking out.  I haven't read them yet, but I am certainly going to look into them.

Dulcet1pms, Oct 07, 2009 03:33AM
Hi- I also have a son with ADhD and is Bi-polar as well.  THe one best thing I did for him was buy, read and implement the techniques in 2 books.  The first was, "How to reach and teach ADD ADhD kids."  The second was, "The ADD/ ADhD Answer book."  Both of those books are filled with things that help our kind of children

[allmymarbles]

Postcript to my above comment: Make sure he gets a comprehensive physical exam. And look to his diet. Don't give him any foods with chemical additives and cut way back on his sugar. Sometimes an illness that looks mental has a physical cause.