Don't know what to do

[concernmom237]

I recent just found out that my daughter tried to stick a hot dog up my niece. This happen two years ago and I wanted to know if this could be a sign of sexual abuse. That if my daughter was sexual abused=, knowing that she was only three years old. And if so what can I do to see if she was or not. She was acting out and her father was in her life. She wanted to kill me and she was a lot of emotional problem around that time. I did put her in concling but she didn't tell the thep. this.

[concernmom237]

Well I called around and have reported it. The advised me to get her some help with a therapist. They can't really do anything unless she says something or that we have caught the act. I am going get her in to therapy and see if it comes out then. I did talk to a therapist about and they said it is not normal for a three old to something like this. But she is six now and can't tell if she was or not. Oh yeah my sister that was with her when this happened just told me, not thinking it was a big deal. So that why I am asking now and getting down to it.
Thank you for all the advise

[RockRose]

amuro,  according to the post,  she was 3 at the time,  and it happened 2 years ago.

[amuro1013]

Well first off how old is your daughter?

[RockRose]

So often kids kind of figure out what to do,  what feels good when they rub or touch,  etc.,  that most childhood sexual exploration is their own idea and no one taught them what to do,  they're just acting on impulse and curiosity.

I feel really strongly that this is NOT the case with a hot dog.  That is such a "cliche" idea in our culture,  much older kids talk in those terms because they fully understand that hot dogs look like penises,  and where penises go,  and it's kind of  a joke to call them wieners (the word for hot dogs).  

This girl got this information from either sexual abuse,  or an older child giving her ideas,  imho.  Natural masturbation in young girls takes the form of humping or rubbing on things,  not sticking hot dogs into a vagina.  

I think this is cause for further investigation.  She got that idea from somewhere else besides her own imagination.

Best wishes.

[grannienannie]

try to talk to her again..kids sometimes are ashamed to speak up..because someone scared them and told them not to tell,kids act out in ways to tell us something is wrong, and if they dont know someone like a therapist she will not tell..kids want to feel safe and protected so they think if something like that happened to them and they know they was uncomfortable at the time it happened..they are lost with a secret..and dont know who to tell..and then they dont want to get the person they trusted in trouble..so they get confused on what to do themselfs..and kids are scared of yelling and fighting..so they act out...and then they show other kids their age what someone else did to them they couldnt understand.and they think its normal like it happened to them too..you understand..so keep looking and digging cause I wish that my parents looked into it more,they would have known eventually..but now their gone and I live with the memories everyday..so thhats all I have to say...and sorry to hear...