HOW DO I STOP THINKING ABOUT MY PHYSICAL ABUSE AND MOVE ON WITH MY LIFE?

I GOT INVOLVED WITH THIS GUY WHO WAS A REALLY NICE GUY, SWEET, HONEST, ALMOST EVERYTHING U COULD WANT IN A MAN...HE WAS'NT! I GOT PREGNANT NOT KNOWING WHAT KIND OF MAN HE WAS AND THINGS WERE GREAT, HE WAS REALLY LOOKING FOWARD TO HAVING A BABY WITH ME. MY HORMONES AND EMOTIONS MADE ME START TO FEEL LIKE I WANTED TO BE LEFT ALONE FOR A LITTLE SO WE WOULDNT ARGUE. BUT THE GUY I WAS WITH ENDED UP TAKING IT LIKE I DIDNT WANT TO BE WITH HIM ANYMORE AND THE DEVIL CAME OUT OF HIM, HIS EYES EVEN CHANGED. I WAS ABOUT 5 WEEKS PREGNANT WHEN HE TOOK HIS RAGE OUT ON ME. HE GRABBED ME BY MY NECK, PICKED MY FEET UP OFF THE GROUND (I AM 25 YRS OLD, ONLY 5 FT AND 125 LBS), AND SLAMMED ME ON MY BACK ON THE FLOOR OF THE LIVINGROOM, THEN SQUEEZED EVEN HARDER (PUTTING HIS HAND OVER MY NOSE TOO. HE DID THAT 3 MORE TIMES IN TWO LONG HRS. I HAD BLUE AND BLACK HANDPRINTS ON MY NECK, SCRATCHES ON MY FACE AND NECK, BRUISES ON MY BACK, ARMS, AND LEGS. MY BACK HURT LIKE HELL. NOBODY HEARD THE NOISE AND CALLED THE POLICE OR CAME TO HELP, HE HAD MY PHONE AND WOULDNT GIVE IT TO ME, I WAS IN NEW YORK AND I LIVED IN PHILADELPHIA, I THINK HE STOLE MY DEBIT CARD SO I COULDNT LEAVE. HE THREATENED ME BY WINDING UP AS THOUGH HE WAS GOING TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE AND STOMACH BUT HE STOPPED SHORT AS IF HE WAS TRYING TO STOP HIMSELF. HE THEN THREATENED ME BY SAYING "I GOT SOMETHING FOR YOUR ***" AND STARTED WALKING TO THE KITCHEN. SO I FIGURED HE JUST WANTED TO HEAR ME SAY I'LL STAY...SO I SAID IT. I SAW MY LIFE FLASH BEFORE MY EYES. I WAS IN A LIFE THREATENING SITUATION. SO I HAD TO STAY WITH HIM FOR 3 MORE DAYS. HE TRIED TO MAKE IT UP TO ME, BUT I LOOKED AT HIM WITH HATRED IN MY EYES AND DIDNT SAY A WORD TO HIM. HE CRIED BECAUSE OF WHAT HE DID AND I DONT THINK I COULD EVER FORGIVE HIM. I JUST KNEW I HAD TO GET AWAY FROM HIM. WHEN HE DROPPED ME OFF AT WORK 3 DAYS LATER. I GOT OUT OF HIS CAR, WENT TO WORK AND ONCE I KNEW HE WAS BACK IN HIS STATE, I TOLD HIM IT WAS OVER! I THOUGHT ABOUT WHAT I COULD DO, AND THE BEST THING WAS TO CUT HIM OFF COMPLETELY. I WOULD NEVER KEEP A MAN AWAY FROM HIS CHILD...SO MY CHOICE WAS TO GET RID OF THE BABY. I KNO IT WAS SELFISH, BUT I FIGURED IF HE DIDNT CARE ABOUT THE BABY WHEN IT WAS IN MY STOMACH WHILE HE WAS DOING WHAT HE DID TO ME, THEN WHAT WOULD MAKE HIM EVEN CARE WHEN I HAVE THE BABY. I'M DONE WITH HIM, BUT HOW DO I STOP FLASHING BACK TO WHAT HAPPENED? I WANT IT OUT OF MY MEMORY OR AT LEAST STORED AWAY. HELP!

[SADDENEDSTARR]

F.Y.I. THE GUY WAS 37 YEARS OLD, 6 FT, 190 LBS OF MUSCLE

[margypops]

It takes time ..it doesnt happen overnight but the human spirit is strong ,I do believe that when considerable trauma has happened that therapy is the best way to go.  Stop thinking , it is a reaction to your thoughts of returning back to the Trauma, that is stopping you moving on , each time your mind and thoughts go back into negative territory, and thats what it is ..tell your self STOP  ..focus your thoughts on something else, your work, your Hobbies, family, anything  ground yourself, switch off , dont allow it to happen.If you do this a lot it will become a habit ,it sounds too simple but training your mind isnt simple, there are books out there that can help with this .Visualisation also helps .Good Luck I am sure others will have good input for you .

[jo929]

you are one lucky person you survived and it only happened one time my daughter was married and had children and he used her for a punching bag broke her nose bones she was a mental wreck and had to be in therapy for years just thank God you got away before he killed you go to therapy and put this behind you there are many groups that you can join they can help  luck  jo ps make sure that he is punished for what he did so that he may not do it again  jo

[SADDENEDSTARR]

Thanx I will definitely stay focused on something else.

[SADDENEDSTARR]

Thnx. I do consider myself lucky. He will definitely pay for what he did to me...in one way or another. Karma is a *****!

[jomama150]

You will get over it. You have a right to be upset. What happened was terrible. The most common time for men to become abusive is when you are pregnant. Just remember you are safe. The same thing happened to me.