My wife and I have been married for a year, I met her when she was in her 3rd trimester. There was no father at the time, because she didn't know who the father was. I was there when our beautiful daughter was born. We eventually broke things off for 8 months after a year and a half of dating and then got back together again and married six months later. We have been married for a year and have had more than a few ups and downs, well one morning after we had gone to her class reunion my wife receives a frantic phone call from her mother. She immediately goes to her house where she was going anyhow to pick up our 3 year old daughter because my moher in law watched her the nightwe went to my wife's class reunion. I didn't hear from her all day and finally after several calls in the evening to her cell phone she sent me a text back saying she had been at the childrens hospital all day and that she would call me in a little bit. Well an hour went by and no call, so I was frantic and wondering what was going on, knowing that it probably had something to do with our daughter. Well she finally called me and told me that when our daughter was at her mom's house (my wife's mother) during breakfast my daughter was touching herself saying that it tickled. Well she started screaming saying it tickled when grandma wasn't paying any attention to her. Then according to my wife's mom she then said that our daughter told her that when her daddy touches her pee-pee it tickles. She also said that her daddy tickles her pee-pee when mommy is asleep and when mommy is at work and when mommy is in the shower. She is also said that daddy's peepee gets bigger when he touches it. Now my wife's mother was molested by her father when she was very young. She never sought help or ever talked about it to anyone until about 2 years ago and she is 52. I myself have never and would never touch my daughter or any child in an inappropriate way. I love my daughter with all my heart and soul. My wife openly talkes about the reaction in my pants when ever we flirt around the house, and I know my daughter has overheard her. Just last week my daughter walked in on us having sex for the first time in her life. My mother in-law does not like me, or any male really and would like her daughter and I to get a divorce. I have a great job, a great family, and I'm an exceptionally hard working man. I believe in jesus and I love my wife and daughter very much . So my wife went over to her mom's house that morning and her mom had called her sister and the four of them went to the children's hospital and had my daughter examined, like rape examined. They found no signs of anything, which most social workers say they don't find anything 95% of the time They claim that when the nurse asked my daughter why she was there, she said she was there because her daddy tickles her pee-pee. My daughter s three I can't see her saying something like that and knowing why she would be going to a hospital unless the hree of them were talking about it in front of her, when I asked my wife if they were she promises me they were talking about it behind closed doors, I then told her they never used to do that and she said she knows but this time they did. They always used to talk about me in front of my daughter. They never called me once during the day and my wife said she asked her mom if they should call me and her mom said no, and my wife went along with it. I felt so sick to my stomach when I heard it and my wife doesn't understand why I would be upset with her for going this route. I don't know what my mother-in-law talked about with my daughter that morning or if she asked my daughter yes or no questions, all I know is know children services was notified I can't see my daughter till the investigation is over and my wife is now staying with her mom and our daughter at her mom's house. She never even called my mother or my father when this happened and my parents aren't even allowed to see my daughter. I just don't understand why this is happening especially when my wife told me and my mother that her and her mom and her mom's sister believe 100% in their hearts that I wouldn't do this but this is just the process they needed to go through to see if someone was doing something to our daughter. I know its hard to tell someone from the internet but I have to wait a week for the investigation to start and its driving my crazy, I just want to take a polygraph and get things over with, however I'm feeling trust issues with my wife now and can't belive she would do this to me, she said that day she was sorry and that she wasn't thinking. Now the next day, they had to call the police detective to make a statement they said they went to the police station, but said it was closed, well police stations don't close. Two days went by and they still had not started a report, I had to call the police detective myself and ask him why I haven't been contacted yet and he said there wasn't a report yet, so he told me to call my wife and tell her she needs to fill out a report immediately to get things started, well she knew this because child services told her contacting the assigned detective was the next step. I called her asked her why she hadn't called and she said she was busy with work and with school, I asked why her mom didn't call and she said that her mother put it on her shoulders to deal with it from here on out. Well she finally called after I found the information out and now I'm waiting till this monday for the investigation to begin. I just don't understand what is going on and I need some opinions, can anyone help me out?
familyman - you are in a terribly stuck place. Your daughter is too young to have a polygraph and it's likely you are so upset that you'd fail a polygraph.
First, it's totally inappropriate for your wife to talk about your erections right there in front of your daughter. The fact that your wife speaks that way right there in front of her, and she walked in while you were having sex (not something that can always be helped, I guess) would make this girl act out this way.
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