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I i need help
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This community is for discussions relating to emotional, physical, sexual, social, spiritual, spousal, and verbal abuse. Please note, this community is not monitored by professionals, rather questions will be answered by other members of the community.

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I i need help

Im 20 years old I have a 11 month baby and im 5 months pregnant. .. my husband and I dont get along any more he verbally abuses me.... it hurts to kno Ive gave him the best ove me for 4 years.... know I cant stand his abuse wat can I do... if I didnt have bby I probably woulded done something crazy...
11 Comments Post a Comment
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Avatar_f_tn
Crazy like what honey?  I hope not hurting yourself, no other person is worth hurting yourself for.  Don't give him the satisfaction.  Is there somewhere you can go with the kids for like a week?  Maybe if you show him that you are not going to take his abuse anymore he will think before he speaks.  It may come down to leaving him for good.  And don't dwell on the 4 years you gave him, it will only make you more mad.  Think about the future and if you want him in it or not.  I wish you luck and give you my prayers
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Avatar_f_tn
huni,..your so young..and you have the rest of your life ahead of you..with all due respect..fk him..,and i mean it by saying just look after you and your baby....i dont know your relationship but just do what you feel in your heart...best wishes
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134578_tn?1404951303
4 years is nothing out of a lifetime.  Just don't let it go to 5 years, or 6, or 7, without actively taking steps either to fix the situation or leave it.  Good luck, sweetheart.
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Avatar_f_tn
But you do have the baby and another on the way so you must think carefully about the best way to proceed. Tell us more about your husband. Is he on drugs? Is he employed? How old is he? Are you close to his parents? We need a little more information in order to be able to advise you.
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Avatar_f_tn
My husband is 23 hes most of the time ununemployed I have to look for a job for him. Ib dnt kno his father mother passed a few years back. And im now thinking hes using me for paper's. .. were in process with immigration... I realy feel like im responsible for him.. ive gotten him out of jail a few times... im scared to leave him, I feel he wont be able to survive. .. I just wish he left me for someone else so it would be easy for me...
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Avatar_f_tn
get rid..just get rid... and although i know thats easier said than done(through personal experience) just get rid...i too wasted many many years with somebody like that...dont you waste your years too...it doesnt get easier and also..you owe him nothing..you had a life before you met him..you are not responsible for him...of course he can survive without you..he has done it all his life..that is not your problem..i only hope you realise that..he will dwell and let you take care of him only if you let him...
i hope your strong enough to realise that you are better off without him and just get rid
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Avatar_f_tn
He abuses you verbally (which often escalates to physical abuse). He can't support you. He can't support a baby. What use is he to you? He is responsible for your baby (as are you) because a baby is helpless. You are not responsible for a grown man. Do what is best for your baby. Leave him.

However, even if you leave him, you will still have a problem. Lack of money. Look for help and job training. I don't know what is available in this regard for an immigrant, and more difficult if the immigrant is illegal. Seek legal advice within your community.
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Avatar_f_tn
Just leave him. It may be hard at first but it's for the best.
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3060903_tn?1398568723
Nothing changes for the better, if nothing changes, and the worst only escalates.  Are you able to get to a shelter for women and their children? Are you able to access governments funds to help you with an education? What education to you have, and will it get you a good enough job to support yourself and the babies? Do you have any family that you can stay with?
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3060903_tn?1398568723
If you feel you need to talk, please feel free to message anyone, myself included, for support. You're going to be okay honey, you've taken the first small step towards peace in your life. Peace that you deserve and that your kid's deserve. Have faith and continue to reach out~~
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4902337_tn?1360764737
sounds exactly like my husband!! do you have family close get you and ur babies out!! stay with family and let him fall... as i was told by my couselor as we feel they wont "survive or last or hurt themselves bcz they need us" is not true they dont think like we do they are selfish!!! he is 23 a big boy now if he cant survive oh well he is an adult he will manage to make it an move on but you do not deserve the pain and hurt he is putting you thru..
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