I am currently seperated from my husband because of how he treats me and andour 5 month old daufhtet. Almost two months after she was born, we got into a fight and i was pinned to the wall while my husband talked in my face. This stuff lasted for several hours, while i was holding baby and was called many ugly names. Since then the physical has stopped but until i left he would get upset and call me worthless and a *****, do i leave? He just got help and is now on meds. Do i give him another chance? He isnt reallly involved in my daughters life. He holds her maybe 30 min. A day because i make him. Scared and lost....
My opinion is no he will not change and if your child continues to see and hear this kind of abuse her life may be affected by it, I would absolutely leave as he hardly has anything to do with her' he is obviously not bonded.or you wouldnt have to 'make' him hold her ..
I would certainly not make this guy hold his daughter. What are you trying for, that he will somehow come to his senses when he touches her and stop being a crazy, mean a.h.? Come on, his problems are much bigger than that, your main problem is realizing this, and getting away to safety for your baby's sake and yours. If he doesn't care about the baby, all the better, go before he decides he wants to use the baby as a pawn in the fight.
I'm all for a person's rehabilitation, IF that's what's happening. If this is a question of an individual who was undiagnosed with mental health issues, but has now been diagnosed, is receiving medication and therapy and you are asking what you should do, I would have to ask you, How is his treatment coming along?
You are saying that you are separated, yet you are having him hold the baby 30 mins a day because you make him? It sounds like he's holding the baby daily at this point. I'm confused.......are you with this guy now or not?
I have gone to a lot of marriage counseling when I was done married to a schizophrenic
I did not know she was this way, no signs when we were married.
So i know some of mental disorder.
I would tell you to seek help yourself, and to stay separated from him for now.
See how he is doing in 6 months a year.
If you truly love him and want him to be in your life and baby's life, stand back and let him fix HIS problem and give him support from afar.
Giving up on him now and divorcing him might not be the help he needs.
But on the other hand, you might not have a choice to protect you and your baby.
Get professional help.
I feel for you, i also have to take my baby away from her mother at 4 1/2 months because of medical problems she was having.
And because of it my daughter does not know her mother. And that was very hard for me when my daughter started asking about her mom @ 13-14 yrs old.
Although i could have not done it any different as the court orders told me.
I had to physical drag her mother to see her daughter when she was still young. Last time she seen her mother she was 2 1/2 yrs old. So she does not know her. But i do believe i made the right decision. With the help of many people. My family and professional people.
I can now say i have a beautiful daughter that has giving me a beautiful grand baby.
I hate to think that how she would have grow up the alternative was not an option for me. I knew what i had to do and i did it. In 1987 that was had for a man to take sole custody of a baby girl in court. It was unheard of in that time.
But i did it. And I'm happy i did.
I wish you luck. And do what you think is right. But get other opinions first. Get informed. So you have all the tools to make that life changing choice.
This site complies with the HONcode standard for trustworthy health information.
The Content on this Site is presented in a summary fashion, and is intended to be used for educational and entertainment purposes only. It is not intended to be and should not be interpreted as medical advice or a diagnosis of any health or fitness problem, condition or disease; or a recommendation for a specific test, doctor, care provider, procedure, treatment plan, product, or course of action. Med Help International, Inc. is not a medical or healthcare provider and your use of this Site does not create a doctor / patient relationship. We disclaim all responsibility for the professional qualifications and licensing of, and services provided by, any physician or other health providers posting on or otherwise referred to on this Site and/or any Third Party Site. Never disregard the medical advice of your physician or health professional, or delay in seeking such advice, because of something you read on this Site. We offer this Site AS IS and without any warranties. By using this Site you agree to the following Terms and Conditions. If you think you may have a medical emergency, call your physician or 911 immediately.