what should i do?

[youagainstme]

I'm 15 and a girl. Over last year I got to know one of my teachers. He is 25. I got very close to him. Two weeks ago I was at his house and he started to kiss me. I kissed him back at the start until he started to take our clothes of. I tried to tell him to stop but he wouldn't. After a while I stopped struggling and let him do things to me. After he stopped I went home. I was confused and extremely embarrassed. When I see him at school he just smirks at me. I can't tell anybody about it as I don't want to get him into trouble. How do I get over this?

[allmymarbles]

You and RockRose make a good case for sparing the girl and letting the guy off. But we have to take into consideration the personality of the girl involved. We don't know her and what means most to her. I know that, had it been me, I would have fought like mad to be heard no matter what would have been said about me. My sense of justice was greater than my sense of shame. Is youagainstme more timorous? Apparently not. Good luck to you, youagainstme.

[Nighthawk61]

I just want to congratulate you for being strong enough to do what it takes to try and protect another girl. We must look after each other in this world. You will grow up proud that you took a stand. Please know how proud we are that you've chosen to open up about this to a trusted friend and your parent's. This is not your fault. You were drawn in by a predator. You now know better than to go to anyone's house, or be alone with anyone that you're not sure of, and that's a lesson I'm afraid we all must learn. I had the same thing happen to me when I was younger, but I didn't feel anyone would care. I'm glad you've got people that do care. Please let us know how it all goes. I don't know exactly what' s going to happen, other than you will be asked questions by the police. Just be honest. and let the system deal with all of it. God Bless you.

[youagainstme]

Thank you for your advice. I have told somebody and tonight they are going to tell my parents. Do you know what will happen when the police are involved?

[nursegirl6572]

I agree with rockrose's post 100%.

I also agree that he should be reported, but I can understand your fear.  For one, worrying about him getting in trouble?  That's not your concern.  If you report it and he DOES get in trouble (God willing), then he got HIMSELF into trouble by taking advantage of you.  That's not on you, sweetie.

You're probably very very scared.  I know I would be!  Is there someone trusted you can talk to?  A friend?  Your parents?  An aunt?  Someone who can guide you and then support you in either reporting him, or getting some help for yourself so you can understand that this wasn't your fault?

Please do consider confiding in someone hon.  You do NOT have to shoulder the burden to this alone.  Please reach out for some support.  I pray you find some comfort and understanding about what he did, and hope that he faces justice.

You're in my thoughts, I'm SO sorry you're going through this.

[RockRose]

I've considered this question all day,  youagainstme.  The brutal truth of the matter is,  you aren't old enough to legally consent whether you kind of gave in or not,  legally it's rape.  This man has probably done this before to other girls,  and he will almost assuredly do it again if not stopped.

He has a keen eye and a good sense of timing to know when he's with a girl who won't tell,  and he'll find more girls like you and groom them also.

In the perfect world you should go to the police and the school counselor and your parents and get a court case started.

But doing that,  you're putting yourself at enormous risk for hurt.  It's likely many will stand behind you,  and it's also likely many would stand against you,  not believe you,  blame you,  call you names.  It's somewhat likely no charges would be filed because there is no evidence.  

There are some girls who could weather that kind of social storm,  and others who absolutely could not get through that.  

The "right" thing,  legally,  and morally,  would be for you to tell and then for
him to be prosecuted and found guilty.  But I'm not sure I'd have the courage to lay myself open for that kind of process.

Prayers for you,  dear.  I think at the very least,  stop feeling like you have to protect him.  He's a predator.

[allmymarbles]

Raped? Yes indeed!! But it is actually the smirking that turns my blood cold. It means that he holds you in contempt. You may care about him, but he does not care about you. So don't worry about getting him into trouble. He preys on the innocent and belongs in jail. It's a good bet that he has victimized other young girls.

If you are too embarrassed to speak to your parents, go to the principle of your school and tell him or her what happened. And ask that the principle help you in talking to your parents and in contacting the police.

Put this bum away.

[BluCrystal]

YOU HAVE BEEN RAPED!!!  Tell your parents and call the police!  Do this before he does it to another girl.  Don't worry about him, he is not your friend!  He raped you.  And he should go to JAIL fo doing so!  Please do as I say and then come back and update us, or just msg me if you want. - Blu