Just need to vent a little. I have chronic back pain and I take pain killers (or at least I try to). The problem is I am addicted to them. I wish I could change my brain or retrain my brain so I could take them like normal people. It ***** so bad because I hurt most of the time. I can't even stand for more than 20 min at a time without my back killing me. I am so frustrated with myself. It's like I am 2 different people: the normal me and the pain killer me. When I'm taking the meds, I am so irrational, I don't take them as prescribed, and I run out to quick b/c I take them for the pain and the high. I wish there was a way around the addiction part so I can get up, be active, get in shape, and do normal everyday things. I'm only 25.....I want to enjoy life..................
Hey I understand exactly where you are coming from. I never took my meds as prescribed either.
Exactly 2 months ago I weaned myself off of lortab and hydromorphone. I have complete torn gluteus tendon on one side and partial on the other along with disc problems in the lower back. It was amazing to me how much LESS pain I had once the meds were out of my system. The injuries still hurt but for some reason the pain was much much sharper as each pain pill wore off. It has taken these 2 months off the meds to actually get back any energy and feel like life is worth living!'. Hope it can be that way for you too sometime in the near future, no pain (at least not much) and no meds!
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