My fiancé and I have been together for over 2 years when I first got with her I knew she had a problem with OxyContin but i didn't think it was that bad and we talked about it as a requirement for us being together that she stops especially since I have two little children well the years have gone by and she is still doing OxyContin but not to get high more just to not feel sick but yes I know that all her mood swings ect are from doing this. But during the last month I have been suspecting heroin use and come to find out I was right I called her on it in a fight and she finally admitted it! So she told me she thought I would leave her. I don't want to is my problem I love the person under all of this too much that I can't seem to figure out the right thing to do. And ever since I found out she has been leaving her foil with her burnt lines all over everywhere almost as if she things I don't care! I do care I don't want it around myself or my children this is not the life I choose to be in! What should I do?
Well im really sorry what your going through. Such a sad waste of time. Smoking oxyes is very addictive and she most likely would need intervention or at a minimum, admit herself into detox. And if she now is on heroin, then i think it is clear the path she has decided to take.
Youve only know her 2 years and since you have children that are now being exposed to this lifestyle, if it were me, i would break this off and run as fast the other direction. Be aware, this could be a life long struggle on her part.
I can't relate in the way of that exact drug. Except that I can relate in the not knowing what to do. My husband and I have been married almost 13 years and have 3 kids. I recently found out for sure he has a opiate addiction (tabs,adderall,Addipex) and its been hard. I've suspected it for a couple years and have found myself going behind him. He has lied so good and covered his tracks quite well. No matter who I asked, they lied for him. Either they didn't want to rat him out or stop selling to him. It's been a horrible couple of years. I keep being to that all his actions are all addict related. Not being a addict it's hard for me to wrap my mind around. This week he is supposed to start treatment. So lets say him only having a little to take until he goes has been horrible. Just trying to give you a little back story before I give you my opinion.
I know how hard it is to watch someone you love slip away. I know a the worrying and pain associated with it all.
Honestly, if you have tried to help and it's still not being done. Plus you think she's getting more careless with leaving it laying around? Then seeing as though you have kids. I have to agree with the above comment. Since you are not married and your ties with her are less. I would leave. If he wasn't the dad to my children I would of already been gone. Maybe you leaving will help wake her up. And she'll get help and y'all can get back together. Then maybe it won't. At least you won't worry with your children finding her stuff. Cause if she's leaving it laying around for you to see. She probably feels as though your ok with it. And if you stay and she keeps getting worse or not caring as to who find her stuff? Your just enabling her. I can my husband always hid it. No matter how much I confronted him.
I hope some of this helps. I'm sorry for your troubles. I know how it is. Hoping it all turns out well!
I think that you must protect your little ones right now, as your priority. If you can help her to get into a treatment program, do that, and leave the question of your marriage open ended. See what happens in treatment. It's a long process to recover from addiction. She may not even want to quit, at this point. But don't allow her to continue to live this way with your kids in the house. She needs to move on, whether it be to treatment or elsewhere. Kid's that are given the impression that it's alright to be an addict and live in the house, will have many opportunities to use themselves in the very near future. You need to be adamant that this is unacceptable behavior near your kids. It's a hard lined approach you must now take. I don't envy you. But will be here for you, should you need to talk. I've been clean from opiates + for 14 years. I know the process that it takes, should you need to talk about it. You're in my prayers.
What you need to do is ask if she will go to treatment now. That you can't have it around your children. If she goes, she is ready to change her life, if she doesn't go now, you may be living with an addict using in your house forever. She can quit with treatment. But only if she wants a clean life with you and the little ones. Think of your family first.
I use to smoke heroin for almost 4 years and there is nothing good that came of itexcept meeting my current boyfriend. I have been off of it for a year in May but it was because I wanted to... If she doesn't want to quit u can't force her. My bf told me get clean or he is leaving so I decided I lost everything else to drugs... I wasn't going to lose him. Now I'm 33 weeks pregnant and life is completely diff. It will be hard but def can do it. I ish u the best of luck. She needs to get off of that shot while she Still can. Heroin takes u fast...
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