Husband's emotional withdrawal from Roxy - HOW LONG?!?

My husband is on day 7 of detoxing from Roxy. He was taking 1 1/2 pills of 30mg each, so 90mg a day. We cut it to one pill, then half, then a qtr and after that he physically seemed to be doing well after the 4th day. Since then it's been all emotional. He says he just wants to be happy again but it's so hard for me to understand how this is having such an effect on his psychy. I have been doing my best to stay optimistic for him and keep hopes up. I have always been a very bubbly, sunshiny person but I'm starting to have trouble. It's not been easy for me to be in a "good" mood no matter what for these past 7 days and I'm starting to just get angry with him for being such a baby. I need to know how long this emotional roller coaster is going to last for him. I need for him to see what other people have been through. Ever since he read some article that it would take 2 years to get over the emotional part he has been a mess! That was actually on day 4. I'm trying to figure out if he's causing this himself because of that ONE article or if this is real. Please help us.

[scarytrip]

Hang in there. My kid is on day 6 and the immediate family is going through hell.  

The drama is coming from the addiction.  

My family and I are going to Al Anon and we are learning how to STOP trying to reason with the "insanity".  We are powerless. Addiction is a disease like any other disease.  You can't be mad at your husband for having a disease, right?

I suggest you find a meeting for yourself.  Hope you feel better. Get some rest and keep up with your health.  

[concernedwife81]

I meant to say he was up to 45mg of Roxi a day, not 90mg.

Here is the thing, yes he's been taking it for 2 1/2 years but it is such a LOW doseage. I realize that he is physically addicted. That is clear by the physical withdrawals but I can't see this as a disease. I'm mad because no matter what I say it doesn't help, he's telling me he can't do this, that he's going to give up. It's not worth it. I'm getting fed up because I know he just wants me to enable him and say then start using them again. I am angry that he chose this path and I am having to suffer for it when I have never put him through ANYTHING. I am angry because he wants to say that he has zero reasons to fight through this when we are barely getting the bills paid because of his habit. We've only been married for a year this coming Saturday and I feel like we will stay in this same place forever and that my dreams will never be realized because he can't quit taking ONE ******* GD PILL a day!

[atthebeach]

i understand your frustration. i am the wife of a recovering addict. the addiction can consume you. it is very hard for us who arent addicts to understand what they are going through. my family and i lived with my husbands addiction for 14 years. it was hell.
i didnt know about alanon or naranon which are support groups for the familys or about medhelp. to bad i didnt know then what i know now. i  would have spared myself alot of heartache and grief living in his addiction.

even though your husband was on a low dosage he took it for 2 1/2 years. the brain chemistry gets all mixed up. the pills essentially take over his brain chemistry and artificially produce the them. so when he stopped using his brain was left without the serotonin,dopamine and endrophins. these regulate sleep,mood,emotions,anxiety,depression,. it will take his brain a few months to begin to produce these chemicals again.

he could go to a doctor and get anti-depressants to take for a short time.
exercise helps get to start the production of the natural chemicals again.
eating a healthy diet with lots of fruits,veggies and protein.
please check out the bottom of this page under the health pages. there is alot of info there.
the amino acid protocol is good.
he needs to go to counseling and also support groups such as na/aa.
this will prevent him from relapsing. he can go to the substance abuse forum and he will get his own support there. lots of people going through what he is going through now.
here is an article that will help you understand about substance abuse a but more.

http://drugabuse.gov/consequences/

please try to be patient he didnt become an addict overnight and it will take awhile for him to heal.
debbie

[Jaybay]

OK, take a few deep breaths.  What your husband is experiencing is completely normal where detox is concerned.  I know 45 mg of anything sounds like it shouldn't be a big deal, but where narcotics are concerned it's a really big deal where brain chemistry is concerned.  His brain is sick.  His neurotransmitters and feel-good chemicals are all over the place and that's what causes the physical and mental aspects of detox.  Once the physical part is over, the real mental torture begins and it's that part that drives people back to using again.

Right now, he needs to get into AA or NA and you need to hit Al-Anon.  Your anger is perfectly understandable but trust me, it's nothing compared to what he's thinking about himself right now.  He didn't start using to hurt you and he didn't start using to hurt himself - at least, not directly.  At some point, the choice of whether or not to use was taken away from him by his brain.  It takes a dam strong person to decide to detox and admit to having a problem.  It takes an even stronger person to get help from others like AA.

We who live with and love addicts and alcoholics become just as sick as they are in our own way.  Do you really want to hold on to all this anger or make a rash decision about divorce while you're still this angry and his sobriety is so new?  Al-Anon can educate you about the truth of addiction and alcoholism and help you find constructive tools to deal with it.  It really does take life-long effort on everyone's part to live a life of long-term sobriety.  Right now I'll bet most of what you think you know about addiction is myth and misinformation.  Get the facts before you make any big decisions or do something you may regret later.

I completely understand your position because I've been there and done that.  Addiction is a relapsing "disease" (for lack of a better word) and both AA and Al-Anon can give you both the tools you need to avoid relapse or better deal with it if it happens.  Detox is only the first step.  Now the real work begins if you're both willing and open to it.