My son is 22 and was cornered into admitting he uses Heroin earlier tonight (tested positive - at home drug test). He has been using all sorts of drugs since I suppose around the age of 17 on a regular basis. It all seemed to start with marijana. I have seen evidence for a long time and knew he was using something. I just did not know what and how bad it was. I have heard many lies and I know I did my share of enabling him. I am a single father, he is my only son -- And I love him dearly. My story is not unique after reading so many heart breaking VERY SIMILAR stories from other parents. I have many questions I want aswered from addicts . But for now, I really am looking for solutions. How to help my son get clean, sober, and stay clean.
In my research, I have found many possible treatment for detoxing, rehab, in-patient, out-patient, etc. I also came accross a non-conventional treatment called IBOGAINE TREATMENT. Ibogaine comes from a plant (I think the root). It apparentlhy has been around a while. It seems to cure the Heoin (and other opiate) drug addicts from their withdrawl and cravings after only 1 treatment (which last I think a few days). The drug treatment is unfortuantely illegal in the US, but there are many treatment facilties around the world. There is much information from Google and YouTube (testimonials). Does anyone have a reliable source that can share information. Does it work? Is it really a miracle drug? Do you recommend this treatment? Do you think that most young Heroin addicts want to stop abusing and fully recovery (would this be an answer to their prayers)?
I appreciate any and all advice that will save my son (and your addict as well).
Unfortunately, there is no miracle fix or cure for addiction. The KEY to an addict getting better and on the track to recovery is them WANTING to, and putting a lot of hard work into the process. The w/ds are a big deal to most people, and a big reason why so many struggle to get clean, they fear the w/ds, so they stay stuck in the cycle of addiction. As long as your son is healthy, opiate w/ds will not harm him, even if he does it cold turkey at home. They FEEL like they will kill a person, but they won't, and they don't last forever. Has your son tried getting clean before? Had he tried an inpatient rehab?
There are a few things that are necessary for your son to be successful. For starters, he needs to cut his sources. Without that, he will have access, when, during a vulnerable moment, will put him at HIGH risk of relapse. He needs block numbers, get a new phone number....do whatever it takes.
He needs to tell his secret. Sounds like he's started that process by confiding in you, which is great. The more people he confides in, the more support he'll get, and the more accountability he will have.
Lastly, and probably the MOST important part is aftercare. Aftercare consists of addiction education, learning coping mechanisms, learning all about relapse, the stages of it, and what to do when he's at risk. It means AA/NA meetings, private counselling, it means a lot of work. He will never stop being an addict, even when he's clean. His addict brain will always try to trick him. That's why the aftercare is SO important. He needs to empower himself.
You need to let HIM take the bull by the horns and research recovery options and let HIM put his own plan in place. Your job is to support him emotionally, and get help for yourself, to learn how addiction affects EVERYONE in the addict's life. You need to learn about enabiling and codependency. Often what happens is, the addict is addicted to their drug of choice, and the loved ones are addicted to the addict. Usually, everyone gets sick. You can look into alanon or naranon meetings, as well as recovery programs for loved ones. That's very important.
Your son has to do this himself. You cannot love him well...you cannot be the one handling everything. Part of the learning process comes from the addict taking back control. They cannot do that if someone else is doing a lot of the work.
Very best to you...I hope your son chooses a recovery path soon. Not a miracle cure path that involves going to another country. Please be SO cautious with things that make such big claims to "cure" addiction and so forth. It's just not realistic, as long as the addict is "all in" recovery will be successful, no matter what path they choose. Unconventional treatments like that sadly often take advantage of people when they're desperate for an easy way out. There IS no such thing I'm afraid. There are plenty of reputable treatments available...he could find the best rehab center in the country, but if HE'S not dedicated to the process and if he doesn't WANT sobriety, it likely won't happen. That's just the unfortunate reality.
Hello BlueMercury. Welcome to the forum.. NurseGirl gave you excellent advice and support It is very hard too add to it all but I will reiterate what she said about a Miracle cure for addiction. I'm a addict in recovery. There is No cure but what was described above. It is a life long maintenance once we get clean, for this kind of dedication it is the addict that has to want it for themselves. It is such hard work on our part but it is necessary This is part of the insanity of addiction. Only the sick can help themselves... We have a addiction forum you our your son may want to check out It is made up of addicts helping addicts to get clean and to stay that way.. take care of you ok for if you are not well in your thinking You will not be a support. Look into the AlAnon They will be able to guide and support you as they are made up of members that have gone thru it our are going thru it.. Addiction is a family sickness but the addict is the center and he needs to lead the way in his recovery. I wish you and your son the very best. lesa
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