Addiction: Living with an Addict Community
Please help!
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WELCOME TO THE ADDICTION: LIVING WITH AN ADDICT COMMUNITY. This patient support community is for family members and loved ones of people who are substance abuse addicts. Discussions cover how to help your loved one, enabling, coping with the emotional impact of addiction, intervention, and when to seek medical help. If you are not a family member of a substance abuse addict and instead need help with your addiction, please visit our Addiction: Substance Abuse Community to get the support you need.

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Please help!

I am a mother of a 40 year old addict of soma & vicodin. He doesn't think he has a problem but he has been doing this for a least 10 years. The doctors keep prescribing him these drugs and I know it just any day I will get a phone call. I thought having 2 children would stop him but he has gone to jail for 6 months, lost his driver's license. None of this has changed his mind he was taking 5 and 5 and now I think it is up to 10 and 10. He is a zoombie. When you ask him he says he is always tired or has a headache and then gets really angry. I usually can tell when he is not on any thing as he is in a pest off mood. I want my child to trn his life around please any suggestions will be so appreciated. Thanks a million.
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Your child is no longer a child.  He is an adult and he is a very sick adult.  Does he live with you?  You're caught in the same trap that so many of us are.  Our goal is to keep our loved addict alive at any cost to ourselves.  We keep them housed and fed, bail them out of jail when necessary, and lie to anyone and everyone to keep the secret of their addiction safely covered up.  How sick is that?!

You son is in denial and he will rationalize and justify any action that will allow him to keep using.  Your feelings and your life have nothing to do with that decision.  It's not personal.  He's just so deep into his addiction that he can't see how his actions affect anyone else but himself.

The hardest thing we as family members can do is what we need to do before our loved ones see that they have a serious problem.  We have to step aside and allow their lives to fall apart.  We have to resist that urge to save them from themselves.  Only when the consequences of addiction become too hard to deny can change happen.  Al-anon can help you learn to set boundaries so you can save your own life from disintegration.  Just as the addict dies a little more every day, so do we.  It doesn't have to be that way.
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Does he live with you?
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