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Sister in Law is a terrible addict..
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Sister in Law is a terrible addict..

Hey everyone, My sister in law has been a user of percs and pretty much any other pain killer for the past 4 years. When i first met her she didn't do any drugs. She was a wonderful person who cared and love for her family and kids. five years ago she was admitted to the hospital for serve cramps in her stomach and was given percs and from that moment till now she has been taking them everyday. I have lost ever ounce of respect I have ever had for her. She has stolen thousands of dollars from her family and friends.  If something comes up missing she blames her 4 year old little boy. It's the most sadest thing I have ever seen. My husband has cut off all communication with her. She has done so many bad things to him he can't find it in his heart to ever forgive her. She has had numerous boyfriends in the passing years and remember one time picking up our niece for the weekend and her telling us how her house is like a revolving door for men. I was completely crushed to think that she had to see all this crap. She treats her daughter more as a friend than her parent. She talks to her dealers in front of them, puts her family down in front of them and talking very very bad in front of the kids. She doesn't cook for them and vary rarely cleans the house. She stays in her room and watches tv or lay in bed reading a book. she has totally shut down from life, her kids and friends. Now it has come to the point of no return our niece has started trying alcohol, going to parties. talking to adults like sh*t and has the worse attitude. Plus the amount of boys she has dated as she said is sick considering her age.
I honestly don't know what to do anymore. She is such a strong manipulator that she makes people feel sorry for her which makes it easier for the people to enable her to continue use. Her parents pay for everything for her and the kids. They don't fully understand what they are doing because they justify it by thinking it's helping the kids. My husband and i try and open his mothers eyes to the fact she isn't helping her she is helping KILL her. She just doesn't get it. We try to tell her that our niece her granddaughter is following the same path as her mother and it's not healthy. That's when the grandmother gets defensive shuts down and gets so angry about my husband speaking the truth. He is the type of person to tell you how it is. I really admire that about him. How do we get his parents to see how bad his sister addiction really is and how much it's destroying their family. Thank you so much for reading this story.
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hello and welcome. i hear the concern and frustration you have.
denial is a very big stumbling block. your in-laws and your sister-in-law are still in the denial stage of addiction.
addiction is a family disease. it can and does cause such emotional pain,insecurity and fear. unfortunately it is very common for the children to follow in the same steps as the addicted parent. my 2 oldest children followed in their dad's (my husbands) path of addiction and destruction.
yes your in-laws are enabling her. it is not helping it is causing further destruction and dysfunction. is it possible to remove the children from the house and let her fail on her own. is the father of the children still in the picture?
addicts are great manipulators,deceivers and liars. the stealing goes with the turf.
i would strongly urge you,your husband to attend alanon meetings. invite your in-laws to go with you. they could be just turning a blind eye. they are aware of it,but "they are helping the children". then have them take the children out of the environment.
if your sister-in-law cant pay the bills, buy her pills, suffer the consequences of her actions she wont have to wake up and see what she is doing to herself and her family.
can you try an intervention with her? there are professional who do that.
there is hope, dont loose faith. many times it takes years for them to see themselves for what they really are.
hugs,hope,prayers
debbie
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