He lives with me. He drives a truck that is in my name .I pay the insurance & note. he rents it out for drugs. I am at my wits end. I have no social live anymore as always depressed or anxious. Please any advice. He is angry at me because I took the truck away last time he let the dealers have it.
Well him being angry at you is not your fault. He is not going to like anything you do that hinders him from getting his drugs. I know it may not be easy but he will not recover if you are enabling him. Stand your ground and hope that he decides to get help but if you let yourself get consumed by his addiction it will not help him and it will definitely hurt you. It is not being selfish and it does not mean you don't love him but you have to weigh the consequences of him being upset with you against him dying or ending up in jail. He will likely find another way to get it if that isn't enough to get him to think about stopping but at least you will start his recovery in a sense and if and when he does get clean I promise you he will appreciate it.
Hello and welcome. Love your screen name. There is always hope... Hold on your faith..... How old is your son ? Don't worry about him being mad. How long has he been using? I would go a step further and make him move out. I know this sounds very harsh. I had to do it to my son and daughter. They get to comfortable, mime stole money, jewelry, always arguing, disrupting the household. I have 2 younger children. It couldn't go on any longer. We try to help them. Our help then becomes enabling. They need to help themselves. Please check into alanon meetings. It is a support group for the loved ones of addicts. You will find others in similar situations and find a lot of support and encouragement there. There is always hope...... My son has been clean for almost 4 years. My daughter has been in a Christian rehab for 6 months.
Keep the faith......
Sending hope, support, encouragement and prayers,
Hi..I'm on the opposite end of the pole.I am a in the process of recovering addict..I just broke my safety net with a par methadone program. ..my mom was in your shoes..I stole from her..when she would tell me no for money I would just take her card n checks n help myself..I've sold all her jewelry. I could go on and on..my mom eventually got sick of it and told me if I stepped one foot on her property she would put me in jail..eye opener of course not I just started stealing from elsewhere. ..and boy was I mad at my mom then..I finally hit my own rock bottom and decided it was time to get help..I found methadone program and through family counseling and my mom quit being in denial of my addiction things got better on feb 20 of this year its been 2yrs since I've touched a roxy and 11days off methadone today...I look back and it hurts to knw all the things I've done to my mom it hurtd n my soul n my core and the fact she forgave me and has supported me from day one of recovery hurts worse I feel sometimes I don't deserve this amazing mother I was blessed with..I have a 5yr old son anf I often wonder what I would do if he traveled my road and I honestly don't know I just hope I can do my best and keep him away from drugs....if your son doesn't want help I agree with someone above me take one mre step n make him move as long as he has his saftey net (you) he will continue to use..he needs to hit rock bottom to want to get better..good luck ..keeping you n yoir son in my prayers
drugs are hard to leave let me tell you, and you too are aware of it. But heads off to mothers like you who never give up on their son. Drug addicts always behave like this. All i can suggest you is some rehab center but as
jennlp29 told her story, he must have to prepare worst. It'll be hard for you to see your son go through all this, but guys like him can never understands what you are going through. God bless you.
Well the problem is he has been in prison almost 4 years. Then when he got out is when he started using. So he is on probation and if he doesn't have the truck to work he goes to prison. I believe prison is what caused him to start using when he got out. It is a very violent place. He kept saying it was full of evil when he was incarcerated. He has a cousin that had been doing crack since he was 14 & he has been clean a year now. He said he thought he was dying & God healed him ..had lost a lot of weight etc. But I think he was just sick & tired of it. Thank you so much for your reply. God Bless.
No...he is not in denial. He has been going to na groups.on his own. But still uses once or twice a month. He just started na 2 months ago. I don't mind him being angry with me. It is just such a mess.
Hi i have just recently found a crack pipe in my 21 year old sons room , he has been living with us for a year rent free now, he has a job , but let me take u to the beginning of it ,at xmas time started having seizures and ended up i a coma for 4 days, we were beside ourselves ,we lent money from family to be by his side as my husband has been on compo for 3 years due to
a work accident , as he comes out of the coma it felt like my son was little all over again it fill my heart with so much love and wamth he hugged us for ages and told us how much he loved us , but little did i know how short lived that would be .He had to stay in hospital for a few days afterwards to get some test and a MRI done but by the second day after the coma he was very agitated and was abusing us and checked himself out of hospital didn't want any test done , didn't mater how much we tried to tell him to stay in and get this sorted he wouldn't listens back home we were. Since then he won't take his medication properly so that led to more seizures and every time we rang the ambulance he had come out of the seizure and wouldn't go to get checked it was ripping our hearts out but he wouldn't listen. So after the last seizure with happened at his work he got stood down and they want a doctor clearance for him to be able to go back, his licence has been suspended as once someone witness you having a seizure it automatically gets suspended for 2 years. So now he has been taking his meds properly and for the last 3 weeks no seizures, bout 2 weeks ago he started to get very voilent towards my husband (his dad) & i although it hurt me i had to ring the police and get him removed thas when we went through his room and found the crack pipe , we had never gone through his room before in the past , but were at wits ends to understand his behaviour , so a week later his girlfriend dump
s him , his phone gets cut off and his bank is overdrawn by this stage he rings and appoligies for how he had actedand we let him back in , on the condition is we want to sit down and tell him what we found and how we can help him with the situation , 2dash into him being home we hadn't got the chance yet to say what we wanted to my husband flew out the next day to visit the surgeon for his leg and i had to go to work ,well it started when i got home , where's my crack pipe the abuse and name calling that went with it was discusting even got up into my face , spat at me told me how much he hates us all , how much he wants us to die it was heart breaking so i had to call the police again and get him removed , now he is using all this emotionaly black mail on us saying its our fault he is homeless and he is gonna kill himself , i just don't know what to do or how to help him, he just won't listen to anything we say or suggest , i know one thing is i don't want him back in this house with that violence it is unacceptable any help to this situation would be appreciated . Thank u for reading my story
I feel for you & all involved. My son was violent towards his wife & verbally abusive to me for a time. Now he is separated from his wife & I kicked him out of the house for awhile. He has learned he can't be that way with me or he won't have a place to live. However, my son is 34 probably more mature than yours. I believe the crack is what makes your sons behavior the way it is. My son has changed a lot since he started using 5 years ago. He does not use but 2 or 3 times a month. (as far as I know) but is causes so many problems when he does use.Because when he uses the crack he spends every cent he has to keep using.He has stolen, borrowed, hocked his truck/tools. You name it. I will pray for you and your son. I believe they have to get tired of the problems of using causes before they can quit. And then it is still hard for them to stop..My Sons cousin had been using since age 14 now 35 & has been clean for the last 2 years. He said he felt like he was dieing he got so thin. He said he just got sick of it. Now he is married has a child & doing well. God bless you Bernie.
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