Avatar universal
not sure of future
I have been with my boyfriend for 23 years.  We have three children together.  Hes been dx with bipolor, adhd and schizohnrenia.  At one point he was on meds for them but stopped saying he doesnt like taking pills.  A couple of years ago he was involved in a wreck and has had two surgeries on his knee.  He start taking pain pills. Right before that he had a heart attack (he is only 41) and i found out that they did a blood test and he was positive for cocaine.  Over the last couple of years things have come up missing...tv, money, my meds, and other items.  Our middle daughter caught him stealing the tv from our bedroom.  That same weekend he went to rehab.  He is now out and I not sure i can live with him. I know he has to go to meetings but im not sure if he is going.  hes only been out a few weeks and i have noticed my meds gone and a few dollors missing.  ive asked and he states ge didnt take anything. he is currently on sequel so i dont know if its them or hes using again as the sequel keeps doped up....Just not sure how much more i can take of this.....Are addicts this selfest?  All this is stressing me out.
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3149845 tn?1452625053
Hi and sorry what your going through. Those with addictions are for the most part not in control of their actions. When the drug wears off they get panicy and will do and say most anything to get it again. The physical demand can be overpowering.
I will say that if you cant take it anymore, i dont believe starting over with a new life should be ruled out. After all its your life with a world of opportunity still waiting for you. Fullfilling your life is the most important thing you can do as we only get one shot at this.
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495284 tn?1333897642
Sounds like he is back to using again.  Are you getting any type of counseling?  Have you tried Alanon?  You deserve to be happy and to live life without all of this.  Our loved ones take the brunt of our addiction,sad but true.
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3060903 tn?1398568723
I had to blood and urine test test every second day for over two years, after rehab, to be taken seriously by my family and even get to sit at the same table as my son.  I understood how disgusting we become on crack.  I initiated it myself, because I wanted my son back, period.  An addict that has gone through rehab, and who was serious to begin with will go to any lengths to stay clean and sober. It doesn't sound like your boyfriend has gone that route. You shouldn't have to chase him to do what has been suggested, he should be doing that plus anything he can over and above it to prove himself to you, your kids, and mostly himself.  Go and find a home drug test, and find out what he's been taking, if he refuses, you have your answer and you can ask him to leave. It's for your children's sanity that you must force this man to take his parental responsibilities seriously. If not, then how skewed are your children's expectations of relationships going to be? Please think about going to Alanon and get some support from some good folks who are going through what you're going through. Once you have, you can suggest to your kids, if they're teens to do the same. This might save them from getting involved with a drug addict themselves. You owe it to them to be a stickler and doing all you can to remove this problem, as it stands now, in their lives. And remember how many clean and sober addiicts there are here, to support you in knowing all the good things that you must expect for yourself and the children. Please message anyone of us, if you need to chat, okay? You're in my thoughts and prayers. Peace to you. xo Liz
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